


By Any Other Name

by allthislovetogive



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Avengers Family, Canon-Typical Violence, Child Abuse, Domestic Avengers, Domestic Fluff, Flashbacks, Fluff, Natasha Romanov Is Not A Robot, Parent Natasha Romanov, Parent-Child Relationship, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Natasha Romanov, Separation Anxiety, Tragic backstory unlocked, mama nat
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:53:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 81,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25916908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allthislovetogive/pseuds/allthislovetogive
Summary: It was supposed to be a quick in and out mission. Get in, gather intel, destroy the base, and get out. They did not expect for it to be a rescue mission at all, not until Natasha turns a corner and catches a glimpse of a small figure behind a glass panel.A small child is rescued and entrusted into Natasha's care, forcing her to come to terms with her past.A series of one-shots.
Relationships: Bruce Banner/Natasha Romanov, Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov, Natasha Romanov/Avengers Team, Natasha Romanov/Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 226
Kudos: 540





	1. Chapter 1

It was supposed to be a quick in and out mission.

Get in, gather intel, destroy the base, and get out. They did not expect for it to be a rescue mission at all, not until Natasha turns a corner and catches a glimpse of a small figure behind a glass panel.

“Five minutes, Nat,” Natasha hears through her comms, and she hums, aiming her gun at two men heading towards the cell before they could raise theirs.

“Bringing out a captive, Cap, give me a sec,” Natasha stalls, firing her gun again, this time against the digital lock of the cell and stepping inside. The sound brings the child down on the ground, and curls into a tighter ball when Natasha steps closer.

“Safe.” Natasha tells the child gently, but with a firm urgency. Basing simply on the shaved head, she immediately assumes the child as a small boy, and looks to be no older than four. She sees him flinch when he hears more gunshots from not too far away, too used to white noise and he immediately panics, not necessarily knowing just yet what to do with an intruder attack. Natasha attempts to move forward again, and feels slight relief when he doesn’t inch away.

“We can’t stay here, the facility is set to go down in a few minutes. I need to carry you out, alright?” Natasha manages to get out, not waiting for a response before scooping the small child in her arms and running towards the nearest way out.

“What the hell is that, Red?” Tony asks incredulously at the sight of the Black Widow carrying a trembling child in her arms.

“I’m sure you know what a child looks like,” Natasha comments as she steps into the Quintjet in record time, already hovering away just as the facility goes up in flames.

“HYDRA’s been keeping this bit quiet,” Natasha looks down to get a better look at the child, and she fights back a frown at the confusion and fear the child’s wide eyes held. She notices brown patches of stubble starting to grow, and the dirtied smock he was wearing. Natasha sets him down on his feet, not letting go of his shoulders until he could stand steadily. Steve shuffles close, kneeling down to the child’s level and he immediately tenses up, not knowing what to expect.

“Hey, buddy,” Steve starts, and he shrinks into himself a fraction but manages to stand his ground. “I’m Steve, and this is Natasha. Can you tell us your name?”

The child simply stares past his gaze.

“We can find it out for you and if not, I’m sure you can pick out what you’d like to be called. Would you like that?”

The child still looks at him blankly, hearing his words but not at all comprehending. He takes a step back, his hand absently grasping at the fabric of Nat’s suit. When Natasha shifts to kneel, he takes it as a rejection and quickly lets go of her pant leg.

“Sorry!” He gasps out, balling his little fists to the side and hunching his shoulders up to his ears. To his surprise, he feels the lightest touch going up and down his forearm, and he cracks an eye open to see that it was Natasha, giving him a small, earnest smile.

“It’s okay,” Natasha soothes, and he relaxes slightly, his nails no longer digging into his palms but he keeps them closed. “There we go.”

Steve feels a bit out of place now. “We’re the good guys, yeah? You’re not going back there anymore.”

The child doesn’t respond after that, the concept too foreign for him to grasp. He does, however, think back to the warmth that surrounded him when he was being held against the woman’s—Natasha’s—chest, and his little mind reels, wanting to feel that sensation again, but knows better than to ask for it.

As they land the jet, he’s surprised when he feels himself being lifted up and holds back a smile when he meets Natasha’s eyes.

“I’ll have to clean you up, is that alright?” Natasha asks quietly, and he nods, keeping his arms clipped against his chest as Natasha carries him down and into the compound.

The child doesn’t protest when Natasha eventually puts him down, shivering slightly at the cold tiles of the bathroom floor. She removes his clothing and quickly realizes that he is a she, her lack of hair and slightly gaunt face giving the illusion of boyishness.

Natasha makes quick but gentle work to scrub her down, taking note of the scars that reveal themselves on her skin as she continues to slough off the dirt and grime. She changes her in one of her shirts, and she has Friday order a week’s worth of clothing and supplies for the meantime.

“He needs to see Cho, or Bruce, at least,” Steve mentions once she sees the two of them emerge from the bathroom. “At this point, I don’t even want to know what HYDRA’s planning to do with him.”

“First of all, _she_ needs some food,” Natasha says, maneuvering around him to get to the kitchen, leaving the little girl hovering awkwardly by the bathroom door. Natasha looks down and cocks her head. “Come on. It’s okay.”

Steve watches the child—the little girl—pad tentatively towards her direction and she lifts her up to sit on a bar stool next to Steve before shuffling around and grabbing ingredients for a sandwich.

“You’re pretty quiet, huh?” Steve drops his voice down to a near whisper. He doesn’t move to touch her, observing the way she sits stoically and watching Natasha’s every move. “Yeah, she’s pretty mesmerizing to watch. Still can’t get myself to get used to it.”

Natasha rolls her eyes as her back was turned towards them. She turns around and settles the plate with a peanut butter sandwich cut into quarters in front of her.

“You must be hungry,” Natasha tells her, but the child eyes the plate warily, and she immediately understands.

Natasha grabs a quarter of the sandwich and takes a few bites, polishing off her slice with an encouraging nod. Steve watches on with rapt interest.

“See? All good.” Natasha declares, and that was all it took for the child to reach for a piece and wolf it down as fast as she can, her other hand already reaching for the rest. “I’m not going to take it from you, slow down.”

She chokes out a cough as she immediately drops the smushed sandwich slice from her hand.

Steve tries to make himself useful by grabbing her a glass of water, waiting until her eyes land on him before taking a sip from it and handing it over to her. She takes it gratefully, her hands sticky with peanut butter wrapping around the glass as she guzzles half of it down.

She forces herself to slow down after that, and Natasha hands her a tissue to wipe her hands on. Before she could stop herself, she reaches over to swipe her thumb against the side of her lips to wipe off a smear of peanut butter.

She leans into the warmth of her palm, her eyes fluttering closed and sighing slightly. Swallowing down all the thoughts that she never had the chance to entertain, she uses this to soften to blow.

"I need to bring you in for a check up," Natasha starts tentatively, and when she doesn't flinch away, she takes it as a sign to continue. "We just need to see if you're healthy and if there's anything you need to be treated for."

"Small but strong." She says, and Natasha shares a quick look with Steve. It sounds like they've been repeated to her. "Healthy."

"I bet you are, but I—we just want to make sure,”Natasha bargains, and she sees fear flash across her eyes before she lets her shoulders slump down. 

"Hurt? No..." she trails off, then mimes stabbing the inside of her elbow. She trembles slightly in her seat. “No more, p-please? Please. I say please. Good—I am good."

"Hey, hey, look at me." Natasha waits until she meets her eyes. "I'll be there with you, will that help?"

The little girl bursts into tears. Natasha doesn't want her to go as much as she does, but she lifts her up in her arms and moves her limbs to wrap around her neck.

"I'll be there with you," Natasha repeats, dropping her lips near the shell of her ear. "I'll bring you there now, okay?"

An involuntary whimper escapes her throat, and Natasha shifts her to support her with one arm against her chest and her other comes up to rub circles on her back. She’d seen Clint and Laura do it with the kids a handful of times, and it seems to be a universal technique when she feels her slightly relax into her hold.

“I’d offer to go with you, but I need to go back to debriefing. I just dropped in to see how the both of you are doing.” Steve brings his hand up to rub the back of his neck, and Natasha shakes her head.

“We’re just fine, aren’t we?” She plays it cool, but manages to give him a tight lipped smile before shooing him off as she makes her way down to the labs.

Bruce catches sight of the pair and motions for her to sit on a free chair, positioning the little girl on her lap.

"Thanks for not stalling too long, Nat," Bruce smiles, and she gives him a curt nod in reply. He turns his attention a bit lower. "Hey, Rose. I'm Bruce."

Natasha inhales sharply, her blood running cold at Bruce's words. She sets her jaw.

"Tony managed to extract her file from the intel we gathered from the base. No last name, but the document said that her name was Rose."

Vivid memories resurface in her mind and she holds the small child in her arms just a little tighter.

If Bruce noticed how much Natasha’s demeanor had changed since stating her name, he didn't say anything to indicate it. He focused his attention on Rose who was tightly clutching onto the forearm wrapped around her middle.

"So, just a standard check up. Breathing, eyes, ears, the works," Bruce jumps right to it, clearly wanting to cut the tension. He holds up the stethoscope and Rose tries to move away when he brings it closer to her. "It doesn't hurt, and it won't hurt. It just lets me listen to your breathing. May I?"

A few beats pass before she manages a nod. Bruce follows through, and he picks up on a slightly elevated heart rate, but he chalks it up to nerves from just moments ago.

"Good job," Nat whispers in her ear, and she blushes lightly at the praise. "Just a little bit more."

Bruce holds back a smile as he continues the routine check up, noticing how she would tense up for a fraction of a second when he pulls out a new object but would relax when she would feel Natasha’s fingers lightly rubbing against her stomach.

"Underweight and on the small-ish side for her age, but nothing that can't be remedied. I'd insist on a body exam now, but I don't want to push her when she's this skittish. Have you noticed anything concerning when you were cleaning her up?"

"Giant lashes on a child's back is very concerning, I would say," Nat says nonchalantly, but Bruce can read between the lines. "Mostly healed, there's one that looked a few days fresh. There's a surgery scar at the back of her head, but apart from inevitable PTSD and trauma, she's peachy."

"Nat..."

"Is that all?" Nat cuts him off. “I don’t know the extent of HYDRA’s experimentation on her but if she's enhanced, those details are most likely in her file. I don't want this to be longer than it has to be, she needs—I want her to rest." 

"Yes, of course," Bruce wheels away to give them space, but makes a mental note to do some more follow ups in a few days. Nat puts Rose down on the floor but takes her hand and she leads them both to her living quarters.

Rose wants to ask if she had done well—she wasn’t hurt at all like she had expected to be, and Natasha had told her that she would stay with her, and she did. She’s still uncertain of what is expected of her here but they don’t seem to be in a rush to let her know.

“We’re here on my floor, and you’ll be staying in my spare room for the mean time.” Natasha explains, and she nods quickly. She gets shown a plain room with a large bed in the middle, a nightstand next to it and a dresser against the wall.

“I want you to rest, take a nap for a little while. I imagine the flight here had tired you out,” Natasha offers, but she does so mostly as an excuse to get some air. “I’ll be back here to wake you for dinner.”

Rose cocks her head to the side.

“Sleep. Come on, under the covers,” Natasha says, coaxing her in. Rose, not wanting to jeopardize the kindness being shown to her, nods obediently and crawls underneath. Natasha leads her to lie down, her palm resting on the crown of her head and her thumb running back and forth across where her hairline should be. “You good?”

Rose manages another nod, her eyes drooping slightly. Natasha waits until she’s fully asleep before stepping outside of the room, releasing the breath she didn’t know she was holding.

She stays on her floor, not wanting to be too far out of reach. Friday sends over the shipment of items for Rose up to her floor, giving her time to sort through them and letting her thoughts run free.

Her stillborn daughter from years ago, buried in an unmarked grave deep within the forests of Russia remains to be the largest source of her grief, hence, her best-kept secret as well. She had named her Rose and visited her spot frequently, now only occasionally whenever she was sent to the area for missions.

She sometimes unearths the memories of her baby moving within her, wanting to remember the fact that she had managed to carry life inside her, but also wanting so much to erase the fact that her child hadn’t managed to survive outside her womb. And now, they retrieve a small girl with the same name, and she is invaded by this overwhelming desire to protect her the way she hadn’t been able to for her own.

The universe has a wicked sense of humor. Natasha doesn’t appreciate that.

When Natasha goes back to check on Rose a few hours later, she panics momentarily when she doesn’t find her on the bed. She walks into the room and sees her curled up on the floor, her face serene as she continues to sleep.

“Rose?” Natasha says gently, crouching down to her level. The little girl bolts awake, slightly disoriented but mostly embarrassed at being caught away from where she was placed.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Natasha finds herself reassuring her with the same words again. “I’m going to get started on dinner, alright?”

She doesn’t bother with asking for her preferences, mildly aware of the lack of variety they most probably gave to keep her alive. She sticks to bland staples for tonight, lightly seasoned chicken breast and steamed greens. She places two plates with the food in between the empty ones in front of each of them, and Natasha serves them both.

Rose reaches for the chicken portion on her plate but immediately retreats her hand when she feels how hot it is. Her eyes stare into Natasha’s in betrayal.

“Hurt! You hurt!” Rose yelps out, cradling her slightly pink hand near her chest. She swings her free arm over the table, the ceramic plate shattering on the floor.

“Rose—,”

“No! No, you hurt! Not safe!” She screeches out, going down from her chair and hiding under the table, pulling her knees to her chest.

“Rose, come out from under there, please.” Natasha keeps her voice neutral, though internally she’s racking her brain on how to properly approach the child without spooking her.

Natasha lets Rose calm herself down for a few minutes, and very carefully, slides down under the table, bringing her own plate with her to set on the floor. She cuts the chicken on her plate into small pieces, spearing one onto her fork.

Rose peeks out from her position and sees Natasha blowing on it before eating it in front of her. She repeats the motion, this time holding the fork out to her.

“I didn’t realize it was too hot. My mistake.” Natasha says calmly. “Should be okay now. Will you try?”

Rose eyes her warily, sucking her lips into a thin line. Natasha doesn’t relent, and after a few moments, shifts ever so slightly near the offering, sniffing it first before opening her mouth.

Natasha exhales as she slides the piece in between her lips. Rose gives a few thoughtful chews before looking up at her, gingerly reaching out to hold her wrist and opening her mouth wide for the next one.

“There we go,” Natasha murmurs, feeding her piece by piece after blowing on each one gently. “We don’t know how long you’ll be staying here for, but while you’re here, you’re going to have to learn how to work with me, okay?”

Rose opens her mouth for another bite, but clamps it quickly when she sees it’s a different color from the white meat she’s become familiar with.

“This is broccoli. They don’t taste much but they’re crunchy. Fun to chew. Try?” Natasha says, and Rose obediently gives a small nod and accepts the strange vegetable. She doesn’t care for it much, so she allows her to feed her until the plate’s half empty.

“Good job, Rosie,” Natasha praises after giving her the last bite, the endearment slipping naturally. Rose straightens up at her words, giving her a shy smile. “You like Rosie?"

She doesn’t respond, but the blush on her cheeks is enough confirmation.

“I’ll just clean up here, and I’ll meet you in the bathroom to help you wash up,” Natasha informs her, setting the plate on the chair. Rose turns to look at the mess she’s made on the floor, and her bottom lip trembles again.

“S-sorry,” Rose whimpers out, and Natasha puts her hand on her knee, squeezing it slightly.

“It’s done. I’m not mad, but don’t do it again, alright?” Rose nods furiously. “Good girl, Rosie. Now go wait for me there.”

After that first evening, it seems as if Rose had imprinted on Natasha like a duckling, and very quickly a little shadow started to follow her everywhere she went.

Natasha surprisingly doesn’t mind this, and she chalks it up to the child still trying to feel comfortable in her new environment. Over the next few days, she takes care of her primary needs such as keeping her fed and bathed and clothed, and she doesn’t pay attention to the teasing she receives from Tony or Clint.

“Hey Mama, how's the baby bird?” Clint asks her off-handedly one morning, and Natasha doesn’t let the sting settle in at the monicker, opting to throw him a smirk instead.

“Baby bird has a name, and you can ask her yourself,” Natasha turns to look at her. “He’s stupid but he’s safe. Go ahead.”

Rose gives him a sideways glance before ducking her head down to stare at her plate of scrambled eggs. She pinches off a bit with her fingers and brings it to her lips, straightening up slightly as she chews.

“Mmm,” She hums appreciatively, and Natasha perks up at her reaction, handing her a fork. She grips it tightly in her hand.

“I'm sure they'd taste even better if you tried using a fork. Here, like this," She says, demonstrating by spearing a bit on to hers and bringing it up to her lips. She nods determinedly, replicating her actions but the egg keeps falling off. She frustratedly brings her fork down against the plate and it fragments into pieces, some pieces of egg splattering around the table.

She freezes after realizing what she's done—she’s been careful with her food ever since the first night and she’s broken another plate again despite promising Natasha that she wouldn’t. She doesn’t know how they do punishments here, and in her panic, tears quickly start to form in the corners of her eyes.

“Sorry! Bad, I bad, sorry,” Rose cries, and Clint immediately takes the fork away from her grasp, finding that her fingers had already indented the handle. Natasha immediately rushes over to her side, dragging her plate next to hers, and gently cups her face in her hands.

“Not bad. You’re not bad.” Natasha murmurs, wiping the tears away from her cheeks with the pads of her thumbs. She sniffles and nods, but her eyes are still filled with mistrust.

“”I—I brea...I b-break,” Rose hiccups out, and Natasha shakes her head. “Plate, I b-break plate, sorry. No hit, please. S-sorry!”

“Just an accident." Natasha reassures, and Clint looks on, not wanting to interfere with a situation that’s already under control.

"Hit?”

"No."

Rose stares at her with wide eyes, and Natasha softens her gaze.

“I’m not going to hit you, Rosie."

Natasha hates how her voice wavers at her name. She stares into her eyes, her thumbs still gently stroking her cheeks, and she gives her a slight nod, much calmer now.

Clint only feels pride welling up in his chest. Thinking on his feet, Clint shrugs as he pinches a bit from Natasha’s plate. “I don't know what you're talkin' 'bout, Nat. Food’s still good even with your hands, right, baby bird?"

"Here, have mine," Natasha says, placing her plate in front of Rose. She picks up the broken pieces and throws them directly into the bin, using a tissue to wipe the bit of egg left on the counter.

She turns her attention back to Rose and she's surprised that she hasn't touched anything on the plate yet.

"Aren't you hungry? Do you want anything else?" Natasha asks, and Rose furrows her eyebrows together.

"This yours, not mine. Bad to take. No asking, can't ask." Rose parrots again, and Natasha sighs deeply, sitting down on the barstool next to her and turns her sideways so that they’re facing each other.

"You're not taking, I'm giving it to you, there's a difference. And you _can_ ask. You're not there anymore. You can ask me for anything and we will try to give it to you within reason." Nat tells her, and she looks genuinely surprised at her words.

“Ask? Anything?"

"Within reason."

Rose swallows hard, not knowing how exactly to ask for it, so she leans forward and grabs her wrists, leading them to wrap behind her. Taking her hint, Natasha lifts her up and transfers her to her lap, her little legs immediately wrapping around her waist and her arms around her chest, not wanting any space in between them. Natasha lets out a shuddering breath as she embraces her tightly. 

"You just want me to hold you?" Natasha whispers, almost incredulously, and her little arms squeeze her a bit tighter in response. Natasha rests her cheek on the top of her head, her eyes gazing up to find Clint watching the both of them interact with a soft smile.

Natasha slides the plate near him before replacing her hand behind Rose’s back, her other hand coming up the cup the back of her head, and she hears Rose let out a soft whimper.

"Finish that, I'll make some more later. I'm busy right now."

"Can’t argue with that.” Clint's smile only widens. "Wait until Lila hears about this."

Natasha doesn't pay him any more attention, not when she feels Rose nuzzle her nose against her neck as she hiccups out soft sobs, feeling overwhelmed at the foreign experience.

"Shh, Rosie," She rocks them slightly. “It’s okay.”

Natasha goes heavy with the praise after that, telling Rose that she’s doing a good job after completing the simplest tasks. She preens at the positive affirmations, and the team had managed to pick up on what Natasha was trying to reinforce as well.

Truth be told, Natasha was not used to being the receiving end of praise, and has even less experience with being the one giving it. All she's known is how to spot the wrong, but she doesn't need another kid growing up thinking the same way she does.

She realizes within the first few days that she’s never been outside the confines of the HYDRA facility since she was rescued, and her only interactions with people have been the people who only see her as an experiment or potential weapon.

She remedies this by giving her a bit of structure that she’s familiar with such as a schedule for meals and naps and sleeping, but at the same time, allows her to explore things she otherwise wouldn’t have been able to experience or know. She introduces her to stories and fairytales in the evenings when they’re winding down, and they work on her motor and social skills throughout the day.

Rose slowly learns how to ask for things, little things like an extra serving of food or a glass of water or, if she’s feeling confident that day, asks to be held. She learns how to use utensils and play with legos and interact with the rest of the team without needing Natasha to be in the same room, and then eventually, she learns to ask about things. Why things are, what that’s called, how they work.

Natasha seems to have an answer for everything, much to the amusement of the people she lives with, and she doesn’t seem to be bothered by the onslaught of questions coming from her little shadow.

A few more weeks pass without a word from CPS, letting Natasha fall into false security, until they call up one Tuesday afternoon that they've found a temporary placement for Rose and that they'll be by the compound within the week to pick her up.

Tony claps a hand on her back, "Why don't you look happy, Red? She's gonna be fine."

"You try telling her that she won't be staying here anymore. She’s made so much progress—she'll be back to where she started."

“That’s not going to be your problem anymore, and frankly, nor is it mine," Tony says, and Natasha shoots him a glare. "Okay, that was harsh even for me. I'm not gonna lie, I'll miss the kid. And I know she's attached to your leg but has the little parasite actually grown on you?"

She continues to stare him down, not wanting to admit it out loud, and Tony frowns at the gravity of the situation.

"What do you want me to do, Red? Tell CPS 'oh, sorry, changed our minds, we're keeping the kid'?"

"What if that's exactly what I want you to do?" Nat huffs, crossing her arms across her chest. “She’s enhanced. She can’t possibly live anywhere else.”

“Peter lives with his too-hot but perfectly normal Aunt and he’s doing just fine! I don't know if you're thinking straight, but we are Avengers. You, out of everybody else, know that our line of work is nowhere near safe," Tony retorts. "Think of the kid, say we do take her in and one night we just don't come home for her anymore.”

“You think I don’t know that? But—,” 

"But what, Nat?"

“What if she’s my second chance?” Natasha throws the words out before she could take them back.

"What do you even mean?" Tony asks, his tone much gentler now.

"Nothing,” Natasha immediately withdraws. “Fine, take her away, see if I care. But I don’t want to be the one to tell her.”

Natasha doesn’t sound like herself, throwing all logic out the window and letting emotions get the best of her. She moves to leave, wanting to save face but Tony grabs her elbow to keep her in place.

"But you do care, because you wouldn't have been this affected in the first place," Tony says. "Come on, I know how to listen. Sort of. What is this ‘second chance’ thing you’re talking about? I promise I won’t laugh.”

Nat shuts her eyes tight.

“What, Nat? I don’t have all day. Are you supposed to tell me that you have a secret kid that we don’t know about?”

When Natasha’s eyes flicker open to look at him with grief heavy enough to weigh the world down, Tony frowns.

"Had."

Tony doesn't move a muscle.

"Stillborn." Natasha breathes out. "I was supposed to name her Rose."

"Jesus, Nat." Tony drags his hand over his face, immediately sobering at the information she had just dumped on him. "If we had known, we wouldn't have gotten them involved—,”

“Nobody knows about this, not even Clint. And even if you had them involved or not, I'm already compromised," Natasha explains, swallowing thickly. "It was easy to keep her at arms length at first but when I found out what her name was? I was gone. I asked her one morning what else she wanted for breakfast and she just wanted to be held and it made me think of how much I had never gotten to do, and how much I didn't know I was capable of."

Tony knows when not to pull jokes. He doesn’t dare to interrupt.

"I had never felt more alive than I have the past few weeks since we've had her and it would break me to be the one to take the happiness I know I can give away from her," Natasha exhales, swiping furiously at her cheeks. “I had a child once and the world took her away from me. I don’t believe in fate or destiny or all that bullshit, but what are the odds of this happening? I can’t just let that go.”

A few beats of silence pass.

“What…what do you want me to do?”

Natasha gives him a solemn look.

“What you can.”

Tony nods, reaching up to squeeze her shoulder. "I'll do my best."

Natasha inhales deeply, wiping away the last of her tears. “You say a word of this to the others—,”

"Not a peep. I actually like my face un-mauled. I got you, Red.”

Tony makes quick work with giving CPS access to a diluted version of the child's enhanced capabilities, given that the child was raised in a HYDRA facility with minimal social interaction and unpredictable violent behavior from various physical and emotional triggers.

They immediately take this into consideration and Tony comes in with more information of her thriving under Natasha’s care, knowing that they wouldn’t dare jeopardize undoing the child’s progress by taking her away. With lots of pulled strings and favors in high places, a week later, it was declared that Rose was to stay under the custody of the Avengers, specifically under Natasha Romanoff. 

Natasha doesn't admit it outright, but she feels nothing but relief, and she owes Tony a solid for getting this through quicker than she had anticipated.

They sit her down the day they had finalized the papers, with all of them gathering on Natasha’s floor with Rose sitting right beside her and the others surrounding in front of them.

“Rosie, remember on the first day, when I told you that I didn’t know how long you’ll be with us for?” Natasha starts, and Rose nods, a small frown appearing on her face.

“I going away?” Rose asks quietly, her eyes wide. Natasha shakes her head, lifting her up to sit her on her lap.

“Quite the opposite, actually. You’re staying with us from now on.” Natasha tells her, and Rose sees the smiling, encouraging faces of the men around her. “What do you think, Rosie? You’re part of the family.”

“Family?” Rose whispers, remembering Natasha’s bedtime stories. Natasha nods, giving her a small smile.

“That’s right.”

“Thank you,” Rose whispers to the small crowd before burrowing her face into Natasha’s neck. They all grin and chuckle at their newest addition, making their way back to their respective floors but not before Natasha could shoot Tony a grateful look.

That evening, after Natasha had tucked Rose into bed, she was alerted by Friday that she was in distress and she rushes towards her quarters to find her thrashing around, sweat clinging to her forehead.

“Wake up, Rosie,” Natasha urges gently, kneeling down by her bedside. She places a firm hand on her stomach to ground her but as she presses down, a wet patch on her blanket starts to spread. She whimpers feebly before her eyes flash open, her little body bolting upright.

“Hey, you looked like you had quite a dream,” Natasha murmurs, and Rose nods her head, sniffling. She wriggles a bit in her seat and nearly bursts into tears again when she realizes that she had wet the bed, her entire body trembling in fear.

“Sorry! I’m sorry, just ‘ccident, I don’t mean to,” She wails, her words sounding garbled through her cries.

Natasha takes a deep breath. There was no need to try and distance herself anymore—she was her second chance, as she had told Tony, and by hell, was she going to make it count.

She lets her walls down, allowing herself to become the version of her that she had always desired to be.

“Shh, it’s just an accident,” Natasha lifts her up into her arms, holding her tight against her body. “You remembered. Good job.”

She grabs a change of clothes from her dresser one-handedly before she makes her way out of Rose’s room and towards her en suite bathroom. She sets her down first before she turns the faucet on in the tub and comes back to take off her soiled clothes.

“Not bad. I’m not bad.” Rose repeats her words back to Natasha, and she kisses her nose, making her eyes widen in surprise.

“You’re not bad,” Natasha affirms, picking her up and plopping her down in the tub. “You’re very good. My good girl.”

“Yours?” Rose asks, hope coloring her voice. Natasha can’t help but give her a wide smile.

“Mmhmm,” Natasha nods, making quick work of scrubbing her body before motioning for her to stand up. She wraps her in a fluffy towel, sitting down over the toilet seat as she pats Rose dry in front of her and helps her get dressed.

Natasha pulls the sleep shirt over her head and combs her fingers through her short hair away from her eyes, leaning forward to kiss her forehead.

“Stay in my room for a bit, I’ll just clean things up in your room. It won’t take me long.” Natasha tells the little girl as she carries her out and lets her sit on the bed. She doesn’t wait for her to respond before she goes back out to strip Rose’s bed to put the sheets and blankets out in the hamper for washing the next day.

Natasha returns to the room a few moments later, finding Rose sitting exactly where she had left her.

“You wanna sleep here with me tonight?” Natasha asks her after changing her top, even though she doesn’t really have much of an option. Rose looks up at her with wide eyes.

“I can?”

“For tonight.” Natasha holds up the duvet for her to crawl into, and she follows right after. They face each other on the bed, and Rose fidgets slightly.

“Comfy?”

“Hold. Hold, please?” Rose whispers, her cheeks tinted as red as her name. Without another word, Natasha scoots forward to close the distance between them, wrapping an arm around her and curling into her body as if cocooning her into her chest.

“Better?” Natasha asks, just as quietly, and Rose lets out a shuddering breath.

“Thank you,” A few tears slipping from her eyes, warmth and security and love and all the good things she’s come to discover since coming here bubbling inside her.

They lay in silence for a few minutes, Natasha’s forearm pressed against Rose’s back and her fingers coming up to absently play with her hair. They’re past the stubbly length, but they’re not quite long enough yet to curl between her fingers.

She hears a sniffle, then feels a tap against her collarbone.

“Hmm?”

“You’re my?” Rose asks, and Natasha, despite her confusion, doesn’t stop her ministrations on her hair. She runs her index finger back and forth against the back of her head, gently massaging her scalp.

“What do you mean?”

“You say in bathtub. Yours. Your Rosie?”

_Ah._

“That’s right. You’re my Rosie, my good girl. My baby bird.”

She hears her giggle softly at that.

“You’re my?”

“Whoever you want me to be,” Natasha tells her gently, biting her tongue. “I’m your friend, your Nat.”

Natasha presses her lips against the top of her head, letting them linger there for a few moments.

“My…C-can I…I want—,” Rose stammers, and Natasha fights back a chuckle, hiding her grin into the crown of her head.

“Take your time.”

“My Mama.” Natasha’s breath catches in her throat. Rose frowns slightly at her lack of response, burying her nose against her neck and muffling her pleas. “C-can you be my Mama too, please? I’m good, you say I’m good. I be good ‘v’ryday, promise. Please, Mama?”

The dam breaks, and Natasha exhales deeply to gather her bearings. She remembers her Rose, never letting herself forget about the child who had made her a mother once, and she looks at the little girl in her arms now, asking her to become a mother again.

The universe has a wicked sense of humor, but she figures it couldn’t be all that bad.

Natasha brings her hand to tilt Rose’s chin up to look at her, and she gives her a watery smile.

“I would love to be your Mama, Rosie.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens the morning after, and Rose gets into a bit of trouble at the park.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't let this 'verse go, so here's a little addition/companion chapter to the supposed one-shot. Gotta love Mama Nat. 
> 
> And thanks so much for all the kudos and comments! They're very much appreciated xxx

Natasha wakes up the next morning feeling the most rested she’s ever felt in the longest time. She moves to stretch until she feels a weight pinning her arm down, and memories of last night flood into her mind.

She smiles at the sight of Rose still fast asleep, her lips parted slightly and her hand tightly grasping the front of her shirt. She brushes the hair away from her forehead as she leans down to brush her lips against it, inhaling deeply.

She watches her, marvels at her for a few more minutes as she ghosts her finger over her features—the light purple of her eyelids, the slant of her nose, the little scar below her jaw—her mind still reeling at the fact that she was real, and she was _hers_.

Rose stirs slightly, her eyebrows furrowing together as she lets out a soft groan. Her mouth opens into an ‘o’ as she yawns before snuggling deeper against Natasha.

“Gotta get up, Sleepy,” Natasha whispers, and Rose hums, burying her face into her chest. She’s never been this unapologetic with seeking her out, and Natasha stores that bit of information for later. A sleepy Rose is a cuddly Rose. “C’mon. Up.”

She feels a nod from below her, then Rose looks up, slightly bashful. “Hi, Mama.”

Natasha’s heart stutters. She was _Mama_ now.

“Hi, Rosie.”

Rose stares up at her for a few moments, and a light blush tinges her cheeks. “Mama?”

“Yeah?”

Rose shakes her head, and Natasha chuckles, running her fingers through her short hair. After giving her confirmation last night, Rose was ecstatic and kept using her new name, testing it out and twisting her heart in the best way possible.

_"I would love to be your Mama, Rosie."_

_“Really?” Rose whispers, her little voice packed with excitement at her bottom lip wobbles slightly._

_Natasha doesn’t trust herself to respond without letting her tears fall, so she settles for a steady nod. Before she knows it, Rose tilts her head up to kiss her on the chin._

_“Thank you, Mama,” Rose grins, her voice catching in her throat. “You the best Mama. I be best Rosie, I be good always for my Mama. I promise.”_

_Natasha exhales deeply, shaking her head and finally letting herself cry._

_“Baby,” Natasha breathes, and Rose sniffles at the nickname. She likes it a lot, she wishes she called her that more often. It makes her feel safer than she already is. “C’mon. Stop making me cry. You need to go back to sleep, it’s late.”_

_Rose lets out a soft giggle._

_“Okay, Mama.” Rose whispers, her voice still a bit wistful. “Mama?”_

_“Hmm?”_

_“Nothin’.” Rose giggles again, snuggling impossibly closer to Natasha, who doesn’t protest the little warm body clinging to her for dear life. “I happy. Thank you, Mama. Good night, Mama. I sleep now. You sleep now too, Mama?”_

_“I’m glad you’re happy,” Natasha laughs, pressing little kisses to her forehead. “You keep saying Mama like that, it’s going to get old real quick.”_

_That’s a lie, Natasha knows. She’ll probably never get over it, and having an overly eager little girl who can’t get over saying it doesn’t help her poor little heart._

_“Sorry,” Rose says noncommittally, her eyes fluttering closed._

_“Just kidding, baby,” Natasha whispers, sentimentality getting the best of her before she shut her eyes as well. “Call me that as many times as you want. I promise I won’t mind.”_

Natasha figures that she was just trying it out to see if it was real, if nothing had changed.

In all honesty, she doesn’t blame her.

“Are you hungry?” Natasha asks, and she feels another nod against her chest. “Alright. Let’s see what we can do.”

Natasha stands up from the bed, and when Rose doesn’t move a muscle, Natasha pulls the covers away.

“Carry, Mama?” Rose requests shyly, lifting up her arms while still lying down. Natasha resists the urge to roll her eyes but complies anyway, reaching down to collect her from the bed.

She walks with a sway in her step towards the kitchen, Rose on her hip and her other hand smoothing down her hair that was sticking up wildly in different places.

“Somebody had a good sleep,” Clint greets from the counter as he nurses a cup of coffee, spotting the child’s unruly hair. Rose jolts slightly at his voice, but calms almost immediately after, resting her head against Natasha’s shoulder.

“She didn’t even want to get up this morning,” Natasha comments, looking around to see the rest of the team scattered in her living space, with Bruce and Tony sitting by the dining table and Steve making pancakes in the kitchen. “Why are you here?”

“Thanks for the warm welcome, Red,” Tony hollers from where he was sitting, and she flashes him an impish smile.

“We just thought we’d celebrate her first official day here with a big start,” Steve says as he flips over a pancake. Rose turns her cheek to look at him and he gives her a soft grin. “Good morning, Rose.”

“Hi,” Rosie offers, reaching her hand up to give him a small wave. “Wha’s that?”

“Pancakes. I made scrambled eggs too since Nat says you liked them,” Steve tells her, flipping the pancake in the air nonchalantly and Natasha rolls her eyes. He was _so_ showing off.

It seems to have the desired effect when Rose gasps, tapping Natasha’s shoulder. “Look!”

“I saw,” Natasha nods. “Hey Cap, wanna teach her how to flip one?”

“Come here,” Steve smiles as Natasha transfers Rose to his free arm. She walks away to sit by the counter next to Clint, aware of Rose watching her settle down first before turning her attention back to Steve.

“Who knew you wouldn’t be above co-sleeping?” Clint teases lightly, and Natasha rolls her eyes and she steals Clint’s mug from his hands to take a swig.

“She had a bit of a rough night,” Natasha hums, taking another sip. “Get your own. This is mine now.”

“Figures,” Clint shakes his head, getting up to fix himself another cup. Natasha looks over to where Steve and Rose are, and she hears her giggle softly at something Steve had whispered to her.

Clint comes back to sit next to her after a few moments. “Everything alright, though?”

“Nothing I couldn’t handle.”

“Nat, incoming,” Bruce calls out, and she looks down to see Rose approaching her slowly with a plate of pancakes in her hands.

“Pancake! I make these with Steve,” Rose chirps, holding up the plate when she finally reaches Natasha. She sees immediately how lopsided they look, but they seemed to be cooked all the way and she really couldn’t complain.

“These look great. Good job, Rosie,” Natasha praises, taking the plate and placing it on the counter. Before she could pick her up, Rose turns on her heel and goes back to Steve for another plate of pancakes, presumably to hand out.

“Can I do ‘nother one?” Rose asks Steve just as Natasha pipes up, “What are you up to, Rogers?”

“Just sent her back with a plate for you. Didn’t know she wanted to do everyone.” Steve chuckles, but he obliges the child as she hands her another plate, this time making a beeline towards Bruce.

“Give me the next one, Ro!” Tony pipes up, and Rose nods, speeding back to Steve and nearly tripping over her feet in her haste to get back to Tony.

“Don’t hurt yourself, kid, or Red’s gonna kill me,” Tony tells her, but accepts the plate gratefully. “But thanks.”

Rose finishes up distributing the plates around, much to everyone’s amusement, before finding her way back next to Natasha and holding her arms up.

“Look at you, busy bee,” Natasha murmurs as she lifts her onto her lap.

“These are great, Cap, you should be on breakfast duty all the time,” Clint says through a mouthful of pancakes, and Steve raises his fork from the dining table in mock salute.

“Nah, this is more of a special occasion thing,” Steve replies, giving Natasha a quick glance.

“You want to try? You can have syrup with it, it’s sweet.” Natasha offers, and Rose nods her head, her hand gently circling her wrist.

Natasha slices her a small piece, dragging it across the syrup before feeding to it Rose. She perks up at the taste, chewing quickly so she could open her mouth for another bite.

"Looks like your pancakes got the Rose seal of approval," Natasha tells Steve as she feeds her little slices.

"It's been what, three months, since she's stayed here and I can't believe you haven't let her try pancakes. It's like, an American child's rite of passage." Clint comments, holding back a laugh when Rose reaches for the bottle of syrup before being placed farther away by Natasha.

"I'm Russian, so the only rite of passage I know I'll be showing her is how to down her vodka like water. Besides, like Steve said, this is a special occasion thing."

Natasha's not surprised when Rose manages to finish her plate of two pancakes, and she taps on the arm around her waist to get her attention.

"Mama?" Rose whispers in her ear, unsure if she's allowed to call her that when there's people around them.

"Hmm?"

"One more, please?"

"Go ask Steve for another one. Bring your plate." Natasha says, setting her down on the floor and handing her plate to her before shuffling shyly towards Steve, holding her plate out silently. He was about to slide her another pancake from the stack on the dining table when Natasha speaks up.

"Use your words, baby." Natasha prompts, making the rest of the team's ears prick up at the term of endearment.

"I have one more, please?" Rose asks hopefully, her eyes wide. Steve smiles and transfers a piece onto her plate.

"You want another one, Nat?" Steve calls out, and he catches her nod before adding another pancake on her plate.

"Thank you," Rose says quickly before scuttling back to Natasha, holding the plate up.

"We have one more!" She grins, and Natasha does a quick double take. She catches the lightness of her tone, then notices how much fuller her cheeks look, how bright her eyes have become, and for a few moments, Natasha relishes in the image of Rose looking like any normal, happy child.

"That we do," Natasha mirrors her smile, taking her plate before lifting her up and blowing a raspberry against her cheek, making her squeal in surprise.

"Mama!" Rose shrieks, all thoughts of discretion thrown out the window. The boys catch on to the nickname, their smiles growing impossibly wider.

Natasha finally relents, allowing Rose to slump back against her.

"Never thought we'd get to hear that around here," Clint grins, though his eyes flicker with a certain sadness, no doubt remembering his own family back at the farm. He drops his voice low. "You think she and Li would get along?"

"I'd like to think they would," Natasha shrugs, then smirks. "Baby bird and Hawklings. You've really got a theme going on for ya, Clint."

Over the next two weeks, Rose seems to be taking up on her promise of being on her best behavior more seriously than Natasha had anticipated. She makes sure never to act out or complain, always following her Mama when she says to do something, but this was also fueled by the fear that if she would mess up or disappoint her even once, she wouldn’twant to be her Mama anymore, which terrified her out of her mind.

They’ve been working on keeping her strength under control, but Bruce had observed that her enhancements only manifest when placed under large amounts of stress—he believes that she could tap into them as she pleases in the near future, but that would come in later with training and age.

Natasha worries about that the least--she's more concerned about her adjusting in the outside world. 

In an effort to help with Rose’s social skills, she brings her to a playground so she could learn how to play with other kids. She doesn’t have to do much to blend in the background, and with a small child in tow, she knows that most people wouldn’t be looking her way.

“Do you want to watch them first or would you like to try for yourself?” Natasha asks, her hand cupping the back of her head as she nervously grabs on to her pant leg.

“I want to try,” Rose whispers, then adds quickly, “Can you stay with me?”

“Of course. The swings are my favorite. I’ll teach you.”

Natasha teaches her how to sit on the swings and reminds her not to let go of the chains, which she clutches with a fear-powered grip. She pushes the seat of the swing gently, yelping immediately at the strange sensation.

“Stop, stop!” Rose shrieks in panic, the rush bubbling in the pit of her stomach and overwhelming her senses. Natasha grabs the swing by the chains, halting it to a stop. Rose jumps up to her feet, rushing around to bury her face into her leg.

“Hey, hey, malyshka, it’s alright,” Natasha soothes, crouching down to her level. “What felt wrong?”

“M-my tummy, it was dropping,” Rose sniffles. “Scary, Mama.”

Natasha had anticipated the little girl being wary of new experiences, and despite trying her best to acclimate her to things children her age should know, she didn’t realize how much human reactions she still had yet to discover.

“It feels funny, like little bubbles, right?” Natasha muses, a firm hand on Rose’s tummy. She nods, her lips into a slight pout. “That’s called an adrenaline rush. They can be bad when you feel it for a really long time, but with things like the swing, they just add to the fun. Like tickles from the inside.”

Rose gives her a doubtful look, but her Mama had proven to her time and time again that she was always right about things so she brings herself to believe her.

“Do you want to try again?” Natasha asks, wiping the remnants of tears from her cheek. Rose shakes her head. "Do you want to try something else?”

Rose looks around the park, spotting kids of different ages scattered around the playground climbing and sliding and playing. She knows what the equipment are called and how they work from the shows she’d seen on TV, but knowing what they were and experiencing them were two completely different things. Despite her initial excitement at the prospect of going out, the swings took her completely by surprise and had essentially influenced her feelings towards trying the other activities in the playground.

She really doesn’t want to try anything else, she just wants to go home and listen to stories.

Natasha has the patience of a saint, not at all bothered at waiting for a response from her daughter who was clearly still trying to come to terms with all of these things that she's expected to know at her age. She didn't push, simply rubbing circles on her back as she led the two of them to a nearby park bench.

"How's about we make a deal? We try one more thing here, anything you want, then if you still don't like it, we go back home. If you do, then we'll stay," Natasha bargains, and Rose looks up at her.

"You won't be mad if I don't like?" Rose had to ask, she couldn't afford not being in her good graces. Natasha shook her head.

"Not at all. I just want you to explore."

With a deep breath, she nods. She scans the playground again and watches a little boy go down the slide, giggling as he does. She figures she might feel the same.

"Can I try slide?"

"Of course," Natasha agrees immediately, standing up and taking her hand, leading her to a medium sized slide. She lifts Rose up to the top of the slide before rushing towards the foot of it, poised ready to catch her.

"I'm here, Rosie," Natasha says, and with a tentative nod, she scoots a bit farther until she feels herself sliding down swiftly. She shrieks in surprise, but Natasha catches her before she could shoot out to the floor, twirling her in a circle.

"Good job, baby!" Natasha praises, kissing her cheek. "How'd you like that one?"

She remembers the rush from the swings--it was still there but not as bad, and apart from the initial surprise of how fast she was sliding down, she had decided that she liked it enough to go for another round.

"I go 'gain!" Rose chirps, wriggling a bit to be put down, and Natasha obliges, watching her run towards the ladder then stopping short to give Natasha a shy glance.

"Help up, Mama?"

They play on the slide for a few more rounds, and went on the bigger slide once she felt comfortable enough. She sees Rose taking turns with another little girl who looks to be her age, and Natasha takes the chance to step back.

"Rosie, you keep playing, alright? We've got time. I'll just be by that bench over there," Natasha tells her, pushing her hair back which was already slightly damp with sweat. "Remember what I told you, come to me immediately if you need anything."

"Yes, Mama," Rose tells her quickly before running off with her newfound friend, and she smiles, retreating to the bench she had pointed to earlier.

"Your kid's sweet, I love the little pixie cut," A woman from the bench right next to her says, but Natasha doesn't even give her a second glance. She can't keep her eyes off Rose. "My kid's the one playing with yours."

"I can say the same about yours," Natasha offers safely, her eyes flickering towards the woman before training her eyes back on her daughter.

"I'm Melissa, by the way," The woman continues. "You must be new in the neighborhood, I haven't seen you around here before."

Before Natasha could open her mouth to respond, she feels a warm body barrel against her knees.

"Mama, I have water please?" Rose pants, her cheeks flushed pink from exertion. Natasha gives her a small smile.

"Duty calls," Natasha says unapologetically, but Melissa nods in understanding. She holds Rose's hand and leads her towards a nearby hotdog stand, letting her hand go briefly to get cash for bottled water.

Rose looks up at the man behind the cart and she gasps inaudibly, her voice catching in her throat. She recognizes his face, it’s the same one that shows up in her nightmares every so often.

“Go, let’s go,” Rose tugs on Natasha’s shirt, not so subtly side eyeing the man who was handing her a bottle of water. He looks at her and gives her a kind smile, holding one out for her to take.

“And for the little one,” He grins, and Rose swallows thickly as she reaches for it. Her mind goes on overdrive, and she’s imagining him dropping the water bottle in front of her to quickly grasp her wrists, yanking her harshly.

“Rosie?” Natasha prompts, but Rose panics, grabbing the bottle and swiftly chucks it back against his head with significant force that makes him stumble back a bit.

Natasha is stunned for a second but she immediately gathers her bearings when she sees Rose running off in the opposite direction.

“I’m so sorry,” Natasha apologizes quickly to the vendor before following after Rose, swearing under her breath when she couldn’t track her immediately.

She couldn’t let her emotions overwhelm her. Not now.

The park isn’t very crowded, and when she sees a little girl in dungarees running towards a bench, she picks up her pace and quickly grabs onto her upper arm to keep her from going any further.

Natasha’s heart hammers against her chest at the unadulterated fear in the little girl’s eyes. She hardens her gaze, keeping the emotion out of her voice.

“What you did was _not_ okay,” Natasha scolds firmly, and when Rose flinches, she fights off the urge to apologize or coddle her close. “We’re going home right now.”

Rose doesn’t protest, allowing Natasha to half-drag her back towards the car, and not even complaining when she straps her into her carseat a bit too tightly for her liking.

“M-mama?” Rose husks out, but Natasha grips the steering wheel tighter.

“Not now, Rose. Just quiet until we get home,” Natasha cuts her off, then adds in a gentler tone, “I need some time to think.”

That didn’t sound comforting at all to Rose, and at the sound of her real name, not Rosie or baby or even malyshka, her frown deepens, realizing that she might have finally done something bad enough to make her Mama—Natasha—not want her anymore.

She keeps quiet, hopeful that Natasha would change her mind when she sees her obediently following her again, but her mind is filled with unsettling thoughts.

What if Natasha was just bringing her back to pack up her things? She's never had things in the first place that were just hers, but would she let her keep a few toys? And maybe a few clothes? Does she even deserve keeping them?

She's been so in her head that she doesn't realize Natasha already pulling up at the compound, unstrapping her from her carseat and lifting her up and out to stand on her feet.

They make their way towards their floor and when Natasha opens the door to her room, Rose freezes. She fights off holding on to any part of Natasha that was within reach, not wanting to initiate anything unless she says it’s okay.

"I just want to talk." Rose hears from behind, and she gulps. She doesn't fight back, simply nodding as she trudges her feet towards her room, her heart feeling heavier with every step and she couldn't stop the tears that were starting to drip down her cheeks.

Natasha sits her down on the edge of her bed, and she pulls the chair from her desk to sit in front of her.

“What happened out there was not very nice. You know you’re strong, you could’ve really hurt him,” Natasha starts, and Rose hangs her head down in shame. “Why did you do it?”

Rose racks her brain for a reason but when she moves opens her mouth, she couldn’t seem to make out any words. She stays silent, her eyes still trained down on the floor.

“Rose, look at me,” Natasha says, and Rose forces her head up to meet her eyes. “Do you know why you did it?”

Rose shakes her head definitely, her fists coming up to rub the tears that were falling too quickly.

Natasha takes a deep breath, then switches tactics.

“Can you tell me what you saw?” Natasha asks, her voice still even, and Rose’s throat closes up. She swallows thickly.

“I saw him, bad man in my dreams,” Rose starts shakily, and Natasha resists the urge to reach out and hold her hands. “He keep…he keep me down when they give me needles. He—he…he follow me. He gonna take me away so I run.”

Natasha pieces the events in her head, remembering the face of the man from the files they’ve recovered and even though it wasn’t really him, the similarities were enough to trigger Rose into an episode. She shakes her head, realizing that she could’ve handled the situation more delicately.

“I’m sorry,” Natasha admits, and Rose whips her head up in surprise. “I know what he looks like, and that vendor, he looks similar enough but it wasn’t him. I should’ve paid more attention.”

Rose doesn’t respond.

“But that also doesn’t excuse you from lashing out. Remember what I told you? Always tell me if you need anything,” Natasha says, placing her hand on her knee. “You shouldn’t have just run off after hitting him. What if you got lost? What happens if someone swoops in and just takes you and I wasn’t around?”

Rose lets herself imagine these scenarios and she cries even harder, her whole body trembling.

Natasha knows she’s being heavy handed with the guilt, but she couldn’t seem to shake off her own demons at the prospect of losing another child under her watch.

“Come here,” Natasha exhales deeply, finally gathering her daughter into her arms. She wraps an arm around her body and her other to press her head against her chest, but Rose keeps her arms pinned to her sides.

“Shh, baby,” Natasha nearly coos, dropping her chin down to kiss the top of her head, keeping her lips there as she hushes her. “That must’ve been really scary for you.”

She rocks the both of them slightly from side to side, and Rose slowly brings her hands up to ball her fists into Natasha’s shirt.

“When you ran away, I couldn’t find you at first,” Natasha pulls her away slightly, cupping her face in her hands. “Rosie, that was my biggest nightmare coming true.”

Rose sees Natasha’s red-rimmed eyes that mirrored her own, and her bottom lip trembles, a fresh batch of tears rushing down her cheeks as she wails.

Natasha peppers little kisses over her wet face, and Rose’s hands finally come up to embrace her back, pressing forward to garble into her neck.

“I’m sorry, I-I sorry,” Rose hiccups out. "I didn't mean to." 

"I know you didn't," Natasha reassures into her temple, and she feels a soft nod against her chest.

They stay like that for a few more moments until Natasha feels a tap on her thigh. 

"Hmm?"

Rose grips the front of Natasha's shirt, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Do you-d-do you…do you still want to be my Mama? Please? Can you? I sorry, I promise I don’t do it again.”

Natasha hugs her impossibly tighter, nearly squeezing the air out of her.

“Yes, Rosie, I’m always going to be your Mama,” Natasha reminds her. “Whatever happens.”

“Even if I’m bad?”

“You’re not bad, Rosie. What happened was a freak accident, and that’s all the more reason to have a Mama, and even Steve, Clint, Bruce, and Tony around to help you.”

“Don’t want any other,” Rose mumbles, her cries petering out into little gasps and whimpers. “Just want you, Mama.”

Natasha feels her heart swelling with more love than she knows what to do with, so she pours it back out to the little girl in her arms.

“You’ve got me, baby. Mama’s got you, too.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha leaves for a mission for the first time since Rose's arrival, and she doesn't take it lightly.

“You can’t just drop this on me with three days notice. Do I have to remind you that I’m more preoccupied now?”

Natasha crosses her arms over her chest in disdain. She had been called in for a stealth mission two weeks after the playground fiasco to gather intel across the globe, and despite her protests, they try to remind her that she’s the best fit for the job.

She already knows that, but that doesn’t diminish her reluctance to take it.

“Yeah, we’re being generous. You used to leave after briefing,” Fury notes with a glint in his eye, nonchalantly waving his hand. “Make arrangements.”

Natasha turns on her heel, frustrated at her predicament with half a mind to stomp her foot like a petulant child. She knows that this was inevitable, going back to duty after an unofficial (and rather lengthy) maternity leave, but she’s finally found a priority that was much bigger than her job and she doesn’t want to jeopardize that any further.

She knows Madame B was right, but she's dedicated to keep proving that she was capable of having both.

Stepping into the elevator, Natasha quickly sifts through her options: Clint was away with his family for the rest of the month, and she doesn’t necessarily trust Bruce or Tony to be able to handle Rose when they could barely look after themselves. Thor was also completely out of the question, as were the newest occupants in the compound, leaving Steve the best person to ask.

“I need a favor,” Natasha says immediately when she lands on her floor, spotting him in his living area with a sketch pad on his lap. He immediately closes it at the sound of her voice, turning his head to look at her.

“Hello to you, too.”

“Fury is sending me on an op and I need someone to look after Rose,” Natashas shifts her weight to her other foot. “Can you? Are you free?”

“When do you leave?” Steve asks tentatively—he’s always had a hard time catching her tells but he’s also never seen her this agitated before. “And yeah, I think so.”

“You’re not sure?”

“Nothing’s ever sure in our line of work,” Steve points out, and Natasha presses her lips into a thin line. “But I don’t have anything planned, if that helps.”

“Alright,” Natasha blows out a breath. “So you’ll do it?”

“Of course,” Steve nods, his eyes serious. “About the op?”

“I leave in three days. Details are sparse but it’ll probably take another three, four days tops before I get back.”

Steve catches the hesitation in her eyes but straightens up immediately. “Have you told Rosie yet?”

“I needed to make sure that you were available first,” Natasha pinches the bridge of her nose. “I don’t know how she’s going to take it, if I’m being honest.”

“I can take the op, if you want,” Steve offers, rubbing the back of his neck when Natasha curls the side of her lip.

“Trust me, this is woman’s work.”

It doesn’t take long for Steve to catch on, and he nods again.

“Thank you, though. I’ll leave a note before I go.”

Natasha leaves his floor to return to her daughter in the common area, and she's slightly surprised to see Wanda kneeling by the coffee table next to her daughter, playing with legos.

She’s still trying to come to terms with the young witch living in the compound, but she’s proven herself relatively safe, if not still a little skittish around the people she had targeted beforehand.

“What’re you making?” Natasha hears her daughter ask the woman in question, and Wanda holds up her simple creation.

“I made a car,” Wanda states, then gently pokes Rose’s arm with the bumper of the lego-car, making her giggle. “Vroom, vroom.”

“Car has wheels, here,” Rose sifts through her little pail of legos, dumping the contents on the coffee table to find what she needs easier.

“Oh, this is flying car. No wheels, look,” Wanda grins, then watches Rose’s eyes widen in amazement when her red mist swirls around the small car, letting it float in front of them.

Natasha, still wary of Wanda’s abilities and the close proximity of her daughter as she uses them, finally makes herself known.

“Can I interrupt?” Natasha calls out, startling Wanda and Rose out of their little bubble. The red mist immediately disappears at the sound of her voice, but Rose only perks up, putting her work down to barrel towards her mother.

“Mama! Hi, Mama,” Rose hugs her thigh, and Natasha crouches down to soundly kiss her cheek. If she was this eager to get to her after an hour apart, she doesn’t want to imagine how she would be after a few days. “I make a new friend, Mama. Wanda make a flying car!”

“That’s great, Rosie,” Natasha smiles tightly, her eyes flickering towards Wanda who was still sitting by the coffee table, looking very much like a deer caught in headlights.

“Natasha, I did not know that you were her mother,” Wanda stumbles out. “I am sorry if I am intruding. She asked if I wanted to play.”

“It’s alright, just try not to use your magic around her,” Natasha tells her, also half-reminding her since she knows she’s not supposed to be using them outside the training facilities. “You both can keep playing, I just need to talk to her for a little while.”

Rose frowns at the possible implication of her words, tapping her shoulder to get her attention.

“I do something bad, Mama?”

“No, not at all, malyshka,” Natasha reassures, cupping her cheek. At the corner of her eye, she sees Wanda fighting off a small smile at the nickname. “Just need to tell you something important.”

“I can be elsewhere,” Wanda offers awkwardly, and Natasha nods, watching her quickly scuttle away before focusing back on Rosie when she turns a corner.

“Come on, let’s sit,” Natasha says, leading them to the couch and Rose follows, her hand grasping the hem of her shirt. She stays standing up and settles herself between herknees, and Natasha takes her hands and kisses her knuckles.

_Just rip it off like a bandaid._

“In three days, I need to leave for a work assignment,” Natasha starts, and when Rose doesn’t react immediately, she continues. “It’ll only be for a few days, four at the most. You’ll be staying with Steve until I get home on Sunday.”

“Can I go too?” Rose asks, and Natasha fights off a smile, squeezing her hands.

“No you can’t, Rosie. I’m sorry. They just need me to take care of things there then I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“What things?” Rose prompts stubbornly, and Natasha does let out a chuckle this time, leaning forward to kiss her nose.

“Work things, Mama things. Rosie, you have to trust me,” Natasha settles with that. “Can I count on you to be good for Steve while I’m gone?”

Rose deflates a bit, a pout already forming on her lips but nods obediently.

“Do you want to sleep in my room tonight?” Natasha offers, running her thumbs over the backs of her hands. To her surprise, Rose shakes her head. “No?”

Rose confirms with a sniffle and another shake of her head. Natasha doesn’t question it, but she’s never turned down an opportunity to be close to her and the rejection settles uncomfortably in her chest.

“Okay. Do you want to go back to playing?”

Rose gives her a slight nod. Before Natasha could lean forward to kiss her forehead, Rose yanks her hands away from hers and hurries off, most likely in search for her new friend.

Over the next three days, Natasha has noticed her daughter becoming more and more withdrawn—not immediately looking for her the minute she wakes up and even refusing to be picked up or embraced. She figures that it was her coping mechanism, an attempt to get herself used to not having her around for a few days, but she has to admit that it doesn’t sting any less.

The night before she was due to leave, she extends her daughter another offer to sleep in her room with her. She braces herself for rejection, but feels pure relief wash over when Rose quickly throws herself at her, clinging to her for dear life.

“Mama,” Rose breathes into her neck as Natasha holds her close against her, walking towards her room with a sway in her step. “Mama, I'nna stay with you.”

“Shh, Rosie, I’ve got you,” Natasha soothes, resting her back against the headboard and rubbing circles on her back. “I’ve missed holding you, baby.”

Rosie whimpers at her admission, her little fingers splaying over her collarbone.

“I asked you so many times, Rosie, why did you say no?” Natasha whispers into her hair, but she only receives a shake of her head against her neck in response.

“D-don’t want you to leave me,” Rose lets out instead, her breaths coming out in stutters and gasps that pull at Natasha’s heart. “Take me with you. I strong, I help.”

“I’m not leaving you, Rosie, I just have to work for a few days,” Natasha explains patiently. She slips her hand under the fabric of her shirt and lightly scratches her back, feeling the little girl slowly relax at her ministrations. “And I can’t do that, baby. I want you with me all the time, but this one I have to do alone.”

They fall silent for a few moments, save for a few sniffles from the little girl in her arms.

“You come back quick?” Rose whispers, a trembling finger drawing little patterns below her jaw. “Promise?”

“I promise,” Natasha swears, kissing her temple to seal it. “I’ll be back quick. Sunday.”

“I stay here, Mama?” Rose yawns, her voice sounding tired and strained from earlier. “P’ease?”

“Of course, I’m not letting you go tonight,” Natasha indulges her, nuzzling her nose into her hair. “Just want to keep holding my baby.”

She feels Rose preen at the attention, warmth flooding her veins as she sighs contentedly and eventually slumps against her. Natasha lets out a deep breath herself, trying to calm her racing heart before her own tears spill over.

It’s only for a few days but after tonight, it feels as if she’ll be gone for months.

The next evening rolls around, and she kneels down to talk to her properly.

“Remember what you promised me?” Natasha asks, shooting Steve a quick glance behind Rose and she meekly nods her head. “If something, anything, happens, you can ask Steve or Friday to call and I will try my best to respond as soon as I can, okay?”

Rose stares blankly, her hands fisted into her nightgown and Natasha is immediately reminded of that first day in the Quintjet when they had rescued her.

“Hey, come here,” Natasha pulls her daughter in for an embrace, and she feels her take in a sharp breath. “It’s okay.”

Natasha moves to stand up but Rose, coming to her senses, lunges forward to wrap her arms around the back of her thigh.

“Rosie,” Natasha sighs, leaning down to quickly scoop her into her arms. Steve watches on, unsure of what to do or how he can help.

“Mama, don’t go, please don’t go,” Rose repeats, her voice slightly panicked. Natasha presses her lips against her side of her head, bouncing her slightly.

“Let’s do something special when I get back, how’s that sound?” Rose buries her head deeper into her shoulder, wrapping an arm around her neck. “Can you be a brave girl for Mama, hmm?”

“Don’t wanna be brave,” Rose hiccups out. Natasha hears the elevator running and she squeezes her tighter.

“Baby, I have to go,” When Natasha gently pries Rose’s body away, she peppers her face with little kisses to soften the blow. The elevator opens with an agent coming to fetch her, and Natasha wipes her tears away with one hand before transferring her into Steve’s.

Natasha enters the elevator, blowing her a kiss before the doors close. When Natasha was out of view, Steve hikes Rose higher up on his hip.

“It’s okay, Rosie, Nat’s gonna be home before you know it,” Steve reassures, brushing his thumb over her wobbling bottom lip. “How’s about we get you ready for bed?”

Rose’s shoulders slump lower, wrapping her hand around his thumb as she nods.

Steve allows himself to marvel over her silent acceptance (and how incredibly tiny her hands are) before heading towards her room to pick up the bag Natasha had packed for her daughter.

They had agreed that Rose would stay on his floor for the meantime, telling him something about her not wanting to stay where she might be reminded of her absence and possibly send her into another crying fit.

He feels a weight pressing down against his shoulder and realizes that Rose has managed to drift asleep in his hold. He smiles a bit as he tries not to jostle her while he makes his way back to his own floor. He hasn’t really had use for a guest bedroom, using the spare one one his floor mainly as a storage room which led to him redirecting Rose into his own quarters.

At least his couch was comfortable enough.

“Good night,” Steve whispers into her ear, motioning to set her down on the left side of the bed. She wriggles around a bit, trying to get comfortable, until she lets out a sigh before settling down.

Steve grabs a change of clothes from his dresser and does his nightly rituals in the bathroom, stealing a pillow from the bed and making his way to the couch to retire to for the rest of the night.

“Friday, let me know if Rose wakes up?”

“Certainly.”

Roughly four hours later, Friday does just that.

“Captain Rogers, Rose has woken up asking for Miss Romanoff,” Friday chimes from overhead. “She seems to be in distress.”

“Thanks,” Steve says groggily, yawning a bit before padding towards his room, picking up the pace when he catches the intensity of her cries getting stronger with every step he takes. He opens the door and finds Rose standing by the side of the bed, her little hands tightly gripping at the sheets.

“M-mama!” Rose wails, her body trembling in fear. “ _I w-want_ _Mama!_ ”

“Rosie,” Steve quickly kneels in front of her, and she all but throws herself at him, crying into his chest.

“You was gone, I did—I d—,” Rose sobs, almost hyperventilating. “D-don’t be gone too.”

Steve dares to press a kiss on the top of her head, awkwardly stroking her back. “I wasn’t gone, Rosie, I was just outside. I went out to sleep on the couch because I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“No,” Rose whines. “You stay. Stay, please? Don't wanna be alone.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll stay,” Steve sits back down on the side of the bed with a slightly calmed down Rose on his lap, grabbing his phone on the nightstand and attempts to dial Natasha’s number. It doesn’t pick up even after trying thrice.

“Do you want some water, Ro?” Steve asks, and Rose shakes her head. “Alright. Let’s get you back to bed.”

Just as Rose was getting comfortable against his side, his phone rings and he immediately picks it up.

“What’s wrong, what happened?” Natasha frantically asks on the other line.

“We’re just getting settled in again. She woke up asking for you,” Steve sugarcoats, and Natasha sighs.

“Can you put her on?” Steve looks down and sees the little girl sucking her thumb, sniffling and riding out the last waves of her breakdown. “Put me on speaker.”

“Hey, Rosie, I’ve got someone on the phone for you,” Steve tells her in a low voice, not waiting for a response before pressing a button on his phone.

“Hey, baby,” Natasha croons from the other end, and Rose brightens slightly, pulling her thumb out of her mouth.

“Mama?”

“Yeah, it’s me,” Natasha confirms. R looks up at Steve incredulously before sitting upright. “I heard you had a rough night.”

"I can’t see you, Mama," Rose whimpers, and Steve’s arm wraps around her tighter.

"Only voice, Rosie. It's still me."

“Steve was gone when I wake up. Got scared, Mama,” Rose reveals, then frowns. “Mama, come back, please.”

“Rosie, I told you, remember?” Natasha reminds her gently. “I’ll be home on Sunday. That’s four more days.”

“I ‘member,” Rose says sadly, and Steve gives her shoulder a light squeeze. “I count, Mama.” 

“That’s good,” Natasha hums. “Try to go back to sleep, alright?”

“I try. Miss you. Lots and lots.”

“I miss you too, baby. I have to go, but I’ll try to call again, okay?” Natasha says in almost a rush. “I love you, Rosie.”

“Love you, Mama,” Rose responds before Steve turns off the speaker and presses the phone against his ear.

“Christ, Steve, her voice is messed up. How long has she been crying?” Natasha exhales, her tone disappointed but not accusing.

“A little while but she’s been a mess since you’ve left. I tried my best, Nat, I couldn’t calm her down fast enough,” Steve frowns, laying back low against the headboard when Rose was starting burrow herself against his side. “She just wants you. Though, after you called, she’s being very snuggly right now.”

“Yeah, she gets like that,” Natasha fights off a smile. “I have to go. Take care of my girl.”

“I’ve got her, Nat. Stay safe.”

Steve ends the call and places his phone back on the nightstand. He looks back down at Rose, her head resting on the crook between his chest and shoulder, her mouth slightly open. He smiles a bit as he wraps his arm around her, also drifting off.

When Steve wakes up the next morning at eight, he finds that Rose was still dead asleep. Not wanting to upset her like a few hours ago, he carefully lifts her sleeping form and settles her in one arm, feeling almost weightless in his hold. He carries her outside his room only to spot his best friend in the kitchen helping himself to a mug of coffee he’s most probably brewed himself.

“A heads up would be great,” Steve says groggily. Bucky raises an eyebrow at him, his eyes darting down to the sleeping child in his hold.

“Can say the same for you,” Bucky smirks, taking a long sip from his mug. “Who’s the kid?”

“Her name’s Rose,” Steve says, his voice still low. “Nat rescued her from HYDRA.”

Bucky’s eyes slightly soften at the revelation.

“Nat’s really great with her, you should see them together,” Steve adds, opening a cupboard and pulling out a few ingredients. “She’s on a mission now, first one since Rose came in. It’s been...quite a night.”

“So you’re not putting her down?” Bucky asks with slight amusement, sitting down on one of the barstools. “I’ll take a stack, by the way.”

“How’d you even know I was making pancakes?” Steve shakes his head, not bothering to wait for his response. “Anyway, already made that mistake last night.”

Steve turns around and feels Rose shift in his hold, letting out a small whine.

“Hey there,” Steve murmurs, putting the spatula down to wrap both arms around her. She coos at the warmth, her eyelids slowly fluttering open. “Good morning, Rosie.”

“Hi,” Rose yawns. “Eat?”

“Mmhmm. Can I put you down? I can get your pancakes done faster,” Steve says, and she nods before he sets her on her feet. “I have a friend over, you wanna say hello?”

Steve glances up and finds Bucky watching the exchange with rapt interest. Bucky immediately feels self-conscious about his metal arm, not bothering to cover it up this morning, but he nonetheless offers her a charming smile.

“Hi doll,” Bucky greets, and Rose cocks her head at the endearment. “I’m Bucky.”

“That’s a funny name,” Rose scrunches her nose, then after realizing her comment, hides behind Steve.

“Don’t worry, it _is_ a funny name,” Bucky chuckles, trying to telegraph with his actions that everything was alright. “You wanna tell me yours? I bet it’s nicer than mine.”

“Rose, but I like Rosie,” Rose tells him, stepping out from behind Steve when he tells her to move away from the stove. A flash of red catches her eye and she moves towards Bucky, holding her arms up in a silent request to be lifted. He quickly obliges, hoisting his flesh arm around her waist and sitting her on the counter.

“Star,” Rose mumbles, mostly to herself, but both men in the room catch it. Bucky shifts so she could get a closer look. “I like star.”

“That’s real neat. I like stars too.”

“My mama show me stars, we make pictures with them. Like connect the dots.”

“Yeah?” Bucky smiles. “You do everything with your mama?” 

“Mmhmm,” Rose plays with the hem of her dress. “She be back on Sunday. I ‘member.” 

Bucky doesn’t respond, and he also doesn’t stop her when she reaches out to trace the red star on his metal arm. He feels mostly relieved that she’s not afraid of him, but a part of him, the cynical part, can’t help but imagine the things she might have already seen before arriving here that clunky, cybernetic arms don’t phase her at all.

“Good job for remembering,” Steve pipes up, setting two stacks of pancakes in front of them. One of them was clearly for Rose, as it has small, star-shaped pancakes, making her gasp in surprise.

“Star! Look, same!” Rose grins widely, pointing at the star on Bucky’s bicep before looking down at her food then back to Steve. “Steve, you make stars!” 

“Yes, I did,” Steve laughs, a bit of pride welling up in his chest. He ruffles her hair before handing her a fork, smiling when she digs in with gusto.

“Whipped,” Bucky teases, but it lacks the sting.

Steve only shrugs, not at all denying the fact. Though Rose was officially and legally Natasha's, she's managed to worm her way into the hearts of all the other occupants in the compound, growing to treat her like their own. He's well aware that Rose didn't get the best start in life, and if he could make her smile like he'd given her the moon with star-shaped pancakes, then he'd do it everyday if he could. 

"So what's the plan today, Ro?" Steve asks, leaning against the counter. "We can do whatever you like."

"If I may, Captain," Friday chimes in from overhead. "Miss Romanoff has left a note for you regarding Rose's schedule." 

"Alright, let’s have it,” Steve says, and he hears a distant ping of a tablet from the living room. Steve grabs it and pulls it up, and Friday seems to have understated the note that Natasha had left, given that he was currently swiping through a few pages worth of notes-- apart from the schedule, it had several points detailing her food preferences, triggers, health developments, and even various night routines if she couldn't settle. 

He scans through them as he walks back to the kitchen, snapping his head up when he hears Bucky laugh loudly. He chuckles when he catches Rose bringing a star-shaped pancake up to her own bicep, giggling as she points at the star on Bucky's metal arm.

"Cheeky," Bucky huffs, clearly amused. Steve goes back to the page with her schedule, and he's surprised to see how loosely structured it was and not at all as regimented as he had expected.

"Nat says here that...” Steve stops to squint at the small text on his phone. “Let her take the lead with what she wants to do, within reason. Obviously no explosives or sharp objects, and walk her through new things that she might not have experienced yet.”

"Looks like you’re in charge, then, Miss Rosie,” Bucky says, holding his arm up for a high-five which she gladly returns. "Giving Captain here a run for his money.”

Steve ignores his jab. “So, Rosie, what’s the plan?”

Rose only shrugs, her feet swinging back and forth as she eats.

“Me and Mama run ‘round and play in gym ‘v’ryday, she says so I can control my strong,” Rose recounts after a few beats pass. “Sometimes I play with lego or my dollies when she gotta do somethin’ else, but she always play with me after.”

"I knew Nat was hands on, I didn’t realize just how much,” Steve shakes his head. “Do you wanna go out, Ro?”

"Hey, do you know about Coney Island?” Bucky asks, only to receive a disapproving grunt in response.

“Buck, she’s too young,” Steve interrupts, then glances at Rosie. “You can ask Nat about it. How’s about the museum?”

“No kid wants to go to a museum, punk, they want to go on rides and eat cotton candy,” Bucky smiles, only slightly dimming when Rose doesn’t seem to catch on to his excitement. “Isn’t that right, doll?”

Rose only shrugs as she finishes her last pancake. They eventually get Rose to open up and they create a short list of places she wanted to go to, even managing to rope Bucky into a few of their excursions due to Rose’s insistence.

Over the next few days, they keep up with her daily ‘training’, then takes the little girl out in the afternoon to places Natasha hasn’t brought her to yet. Steve insisted on the planetarium the first day, remembering the stars Rose was telling Bucky about, and she convinces them to go back the day after. They make sure that her days are full and action-packed, just enough to exhaust and distract her from thinking too much about her mother’s absence.

The day before Natasha was set to come home, Steve receives a message that the mission had gone south and might take another day or two before she could get back.

Steve tries to contact her, tries to ask her who would be the one to break the news to Rose, but his calls don’t come through due to the poor signal in where ever Natasha was.

A few hours later, just before Rose’s bedtime, his phone rings and he answers it immediately.

“Hey,” Steve greets casually, almost overcompensatingly. “Sorta left me hanging there.”

“Hey yourself,” Natasha replies, no ounce of guilt in her tone. “Signal’s shit. We’re doing a final sweep tomorrow before I go back home.”

“All good?”

“You have so much faith in me, I’m flattered.”

“Of course,” Steve lets out a chuckle, then clears his throat when he catches Rose crawling towards him with a curious look on her face. “What time on Monday?”

“Early,” Natasha exhales. “Put me on speaker?”

Steve motions for Rose to come closer to snuggle against his side as he presses the button, letting Natasha’s voice fill the room.

“Hello?”

“Mama! Hi, Mama,” Rose smiles, snatching the phone from Steve’s grasp. “See you t’morrow. Miss you a lot.”

“Hi, baby,” Natasha’s smile can be heard through the receiver. “I miss you, too.”

“We went to palnetarum—,”

“ _Planetarium,_ ” Steve corrects, and Rose nods once.

“Yeah, palmetarium! We saw so many stars, Mama, I’nna show you! Can we go t’morrow?”

“That sounds amazing, Rosie,” Natasha forces her voice to still sound light. “But I’m actually calling to tell you that I won’t make it in time tomorrow.”

Rose’s smile drops as quickly as it came, sending a panicked glance up at Steve.

“But you promise,” Rose argues. “Sunday. I count until Sunday, you’re s’posed to be home t’morrow.”

“Just one more day, I’m so sorry,” Natasha says, and it’s silent on both ends for a few moments. “Rosie?”

Rose furrows her eyebrows, feeling sadness and anger bubbling up inside her. Her Mama has never broken a promise, and she’s frustrated that she’s waited so long and just when she thinks she’s about to come back, she has to wait even longer.

“I pro—we’ll do something special when I get back, I told you that. We’ll spend the whole day at the planetarium, how’s that sound?”

Rose doesn’t respond, furiously rubbing her eyes with a balled up fist.

“Rosie, she asked you a question,” Steve murmurs, but Rose drops the phone on her lap, moving to throw her arm around his waist and burying her face against his side, frowning at how quickly her tears soak through his shirt.

“Mama loves you, Rosie,” Natasha’s voice wavers slightly. “Can I hear your voice, baby?”

Rosie shakes her head against Steve’s side, and he takes that as his cue to grab the phone from her lap and turning it off speaker.

“Nat…” Steve trails off, not knowing where to start.

“That went well,” Nat chuckles mirthlessly. “Keep her close tonight?”

“I am,” Steve affirms, gently rubbing Rose’s back for good measure. “She’ll come around.”

“She doesn’t want to talk to me, that’s fair,” Natasha shakes her head. “Gotta go.”

“Take care, Nat.”

He pulls the phone away and Rose seems dead set on melding herself to his side, a bit of his shirt balled up in her fist.

“No Mama t’morrow,” Rose hiccups, her cries slowly simmering down. “She p-promise.”

“I know, Ro,” Steve sighs, pressing a kiss to her head. “Just…try to get some sleep. We’ll think of something fun to do.”

Steve wakes up the next morning with Rose not next to him. Thinking the worst, he immediately bolts up and steps down, only to find her curled up in a ball on the floor. He picks her up and settles her back on the bed so she could get some more sleep, but she starts to stir when he moves to put the covers over her body.

“What made you want to sleep on the floor, hmm?” Steve asks lightly, but Rose doesn’t respond, her eyes dull and not meeting his. “Rosie?”

She looks up, her hollow gaze almost going right through him.

“Hey, are you alright? Are you sick?” Steve asks worriedly, moving to put his hand over her forehead but she immediately flinches away, hiding under the covers. “Hey, Rosie. Talk to me. What’s wrong? “

Rose doesn’t move a muscle, and his worry only grows as the moments stretch out. He tries to scan the note that Natasha had left but there was nothing in there that talked about what to do when she becomes nearly catatonic.

“Honey,” Steve whispers, kneeling down and putting a hand over her through the covers. “Are you hungry? Do you want me to make you something?”

The silence is almost deafening.

“Come on, Ro,” Steve pleads gently. “Help me out here, please. It’ll be okay.”

He waits for a few more moments and when Rose doesn’t move another muscle, he gets up and gives her a bit of space, heading to the kitchen to fix up something light for the both of them.

When he gets back with two bowls of soup on a tray, he notices that she hasn’t moved from her spot on the bed but the lump underneath was visibly shaking. Hastily setting the food down, he pulls the covers away to reveal Rose in a fetal position, her breathing shallow and sobbing uncontrollably.

“Rosie!” Steve exclaims, picking her trembling form up and pressing her against his chest, swaying her ever so gently. “Breathe, Ro.”

Rose squirms against his hold as she tries to breathe through her cries, then in a blink, her stomach lurches and the bile rises up in her throat, vomit staining their shirts and dribbling down her chin.

“S-sorry! Steve, sorry!” Rose gasps out, her cries making her breathing erratic. Steve resists the urge to pull her away from him, not wanting to set her off even further.

“It’s okay, Rosie, it’s alright,” Steve reassures, making a beeline towards the bathroom. He sits her down over the toilet and kneels down in front of her, taking her hands in his.

“Rosie, deep breaths for me, okay?” Steve tells her, lightly squeezing her hands. She struggles to follow him at first, but eventually manages to take in deep, shaky breaths. “That’s it. Good girl, Rosie.”

Once she’s mostly calmed down, Steve removes Rosie’s soiled clothes first before his own shirt, plopping her into the tub and making quick work of washing her down. She’s dead silent as he wraps her up in a towel and helps her brush her teeth, dressing her up quickly before taking care of the mess in the bedroom.

He’s surprised when Rose shyly reaches his arms up to him after putting on a new shirt, and he gives in without complaint.

“I’m guessing it’s a quiet day today, Ro, but that’s alright,” Steve says, carrying her out to the living room and the cold bowls of soup by the bedside long forgotten. “We’ll take it easy. Just stay in and let the day pass.”

And that’s exactly what they do—in between meals (or more accurately, Steve eating and trying to coax a few spoonfuls into Rose), Steve draws with Rose on his lap, silently watching him create black and white figures and being lulled in and out of sleep by the soft scratches of graphite against paper. He reads aloud every once in a while to keep Rose entertained, and when the night falls, he’s not at all surprised when she falls limp against him, seemingly exhausted by her inner turmoil.

He doesn’t let her leave his arms for the rest of the night, and it was in this position where Natasha finds them in the early morning. She stares at the two of them, her eyes zeroing in on her daughter, and then frowns when she spots the light purple circles under her eyes.

Natasha taps Steve lightly on the shoulder and he immediately wraps his arms protectively around Rose, his eyes flashing open.

“Just me, Cap,” Natasha keeps her voice low. “No threat.”

“Understatement,” Steve blinks a few times, relaxing slightly. He sits up slightly, keeping Rose flush against his chest. “Nice to have you back. When did you get in?”

“An hour ago. Cleaned myself up then went straight here,” She reaches out to press her hand on Rose’s back. “How was she?”

“Rocky at the start, then it was alright for the next few days, barely gave us any trouble—,”

“Us?”

“Bucky came over a few times, also Wanda and Sam. She’s fond of Buck.”

Natasha hums. “You were saying? What about after I called the other night?”

“Oh God, Nat, I’m sorry,” Steve frowns at the memory. “She wouldn’t talk or respond or eat. She wasn’t running a temperature or anything, I think she just worried herself sick.” 

“Shit,” Natasha mutters under her breath. “She wouldn’t talk to me. I’ve never felt that bad in my life.”

“You’re here now, though,” Steve offers. “She was calm the whole afternoon, if that helps.”

“I came down here to bring her up but she seems comfortable,” Natasha frowns, lightly stroking her back.

“You can stay. Might as well go for a run now that I’m up,” Steve yawns, sitting up fully and carefully sets Rose down on the bed as he stands up. She whines in her sleep but quickly settles, burying her face into the pillow.

“Mind if I stay here until she wakes up?” Natasha asks, but she was already making her way on the other side of the bed, slipping under the covers and next to her daughter.

“Not at all, she’ll be happy to see you,” Steve stretches his back slightly. “Need anything while I’m out?”

“Pastries, if you can. Breakfast treat for the kid.”

“Gotcha,” Steve nods.

“Hey Steve?” Natasha calls out before he leaves the room, and he turns around to look at her. “Thank you.”

He gives her a smile before leaving the pair in the room, and Natasha feels Rose shift in her sleep. She gently presses her daughter against her, inhaling her baby scent that she’s missed the past few days, and exhales when she relaxes in her hold.

Not being able to sleep again, Natasha simply watches her daughter as she does, her hand playing with the hair on the back of her head. Two hours quickly pass and when she hears the faint whirr of the elevator settling on the floor, she tenses slightly, holding Rose tighter. Steve knocks on the door, popping his head in to say that he bought an assortment since he wasn’t sure what they wanted, and goes back out to give them a bit of privacy.

Natasha takes a deep breath to steady herself before trying to coax Rose awake, pressing feather light kisses on her forehead, then over each of her eyelids and the tip of her nose. She moves back up, keeping her lips hovering over her hairline.

“It’s morning, Rosie,” Natasha whispers into her skin. “Time to wake up.”

Rose hums, her eyebrows furrowing when she reaches over and doesn’t feel the large bulk of a waist that she’s grown accustomed to. She flutters her eyes open and looks up, a small gasp escaping her lips when she realizes that it was Natasha smiling down at her.

“Hi, baby,” Natasha grins, holding her impossibly tighter. Rose haphazardly hooks her leg over her waist and clambers on top of her, making her chuckle. “Rosie, I’ve missed you so much.”

A shudder flows through Rose, all traces of anger and disappointment gone at the presence of her mother. She inhales deeply, burying her face into Natasha’s neck.

“M-mama,” Rose heaves out shakily, struggling to grasp at her shirt. Natasha takes her little hand in hers, bringing it up to kiss her fingers and the inside of her wrist, and tears escape Rose’s eyes at the sensation. “M-mama, you…y—,”

“Shh,” Natasha soothes, sitting up slightly with her hand slowly stroking her back. “I’m here. Mama’s here.”

“Don’t…d-don’t leave me ‘gain, please,” Rose struggles to get out. “Was sad, Mama. You say come back on Sunday but you didn’t. I thought—I th-thought you wasn’t goin’ back anymore.”

“No, baby, no,” Natasha squeezes her tightly. “There might be times when I need to go out but I am always, always going to try to get home to you when I say I will, no matter what. Can you remember that for me?”

She feels a small nod against her chest, then hears a slight rumble against her stomach.

“You hungry, Rosie?” Natasha chuckles, lightly poking her side. Rose sniffles feebly.

“Super hungry, Mama,” Rose admits. “Tummy hurts lots.”

“We can’t have that, can we?” Natasha tuts, and Rose lets out a sigh when she reaches up to wipe her tears away with her index finger. “Come on. Steve brought pastries. Were you good for him while I was gone?”

“I dunno,” Rose frowns. “I made sick on Steve. That not good.”

“Oh, Rosie,” Natasha exhales deeply to steel herself. “I’m so, so, sorry.”

“S’okay,” Rose whispers, and Natasha moves to stand with her daughter securely in her arms.

“It’s not. I made you a promise and I broke it, and you worried yourself sick because of it,” Natasha tells her, swaying the both of them slightly. “I’ll do better, alright? You have my word.”

Rose hums contentedly in response. Natasha slowly walks out the room, spotting Steve sitting by the counter and halfway through eating a croissant.

“How was the reunion?” Steve asks casually, pushing the box of pastries towards them. The second Natasha sits Rose down on her lap, she reaches in and grabs a chocolate danish, taking a large bite.

“Slow down,” Natasha chides quickly, and Rose takes another large bite, heeding her advice. “We’re good. Might not let me put her down for the rest of the day, but I’m not complaining.”

“That was us yesterday,” Steve grins. “But I’m chopped liver, now that you’re here.”

“Can I have ‘nother, Mama?” Rose asks, twisting around to look up at Natasha and she laughs at the chocolate smears around her mouth.

“Go for it,” Natasha smiles, plucking an apple turnover from the box and handing it to her. She turns her attention back to Steve. “She just hasn’t seen me in a while.“

“You’re really great with her, you know?” Steve tells her, and when she was about to brush off the comment, he continues. “I used to dream about settling down, having a family—I’ve stopped after a while, but seeing you with her doesn’t make it sound impossible anymore.”

She understands, more than he knows. And she looks down at Rose, her Rose, who had changed her life in such a short span of time, and looks back up at Steve to give him a small, genuine smile.

“It’s all worth it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Has anyone read Black Widow #2? Because I'm channeling the soft Nat there in this one.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Most of the time, the overwhelming need to protect and love and give Rose everything she’s been denied takes over her body like second nature, and Natasha feels like she does a pretty good job at providing such.
> 
> But waking up to anguish filled cries at three in the morning—it’s times like these that she second guesses her choice of taking Rose in.

“Rosie?” Natasha knocks over the sound of cries from the other side of the door. “I’m coming in, okay?” 

Without waiting for a response, she opens the door and quickly approaches the small mass of shaking limbs on the bed, sheets thrown off to the side and her shirt off her body, pooling around her neck. 

Most of the time, the overwhelming need to protect and love and give Rose everything she’s been denied takes over her body like second nature, and Natasha feels like she does a pretty good job at providing such. 

But waking up to anguish filled cries at three in the morning—it’s times like these that she second guesses her choice of taking Rose in. It’s not because she doesn’t want her, not at all, but rather it’s the crippling fear of inadequacy, the lack of preparation, and the question of ‘am I even doing this right’ constantly on her mind when she interacts with the little girl.

Rose’s eyes are wrenched shut, her hands balled into fists as she screams again, her head slamming against the pillow and her body arching off the bed. Natasha quickly moves to the other side in attempt to hold her still, but she wails again when she reaches out to remove the shirt from around her neck.

“Rosie, wake up for me, please,” Natasha tries to say above her cries, but Rose doesn’t hear her, seemingly unable to escape the confines of her memories manifesting as night terrors. “C’mon, Rosie.”

“Stop!  _ Stop!_” Rose screeches out, turning to flop onto her belly, digging her nails deep into the pillow as she screams, phantom pains flaring across her back, flinching at the unmistakable crack of the whip striking against skin.

Natasha feels her heart wrench in sadness and anger at the view in front of her, quickly realizing that she was unconsciously reliving one of her punishments from the HYDRA base. She takes a deep breath and tries again, reaching for her hand this time, and lets out a small sigh of relief when she doesn’t flinch away.

“Hey, Rosie, listen to me,” Natasha lays on her stomach as well, keeping a feather light touch on the back of her palm. “Mama's here, I've got you. Listen to my voice, baby.”

Rose screams again, her other hand coming up to strike against the air, managing to punch the bedside table lamp and sending the glass of water shattering to the floor. 

“Rosie, please,” Natasha pleads, daring to scoot a bit closer. “C’mon, baby girl. Focus on me.”

“ _Stop! No more, no more,_ ” Rose screeches, her voice hoarse from exertion and her body twitching away from the imaginary abuser. She attempts to curl into a ball but the skin of the back stretches, the healed welts seemingly fresh as she whimpers loudly, burrowing her face into the pillow. 

“No more, baby,” Natasha confirms, tapping a little code on the back of her hand.  _Love you._ “No more.” 

Natasha waits patiently, dutifully, whispering and tapping little messages of encouragement and reassurance, until Rose’s sobs slowly peter down into soft cries, her eyes remaining shut throughout her whole ordeal.

“Rosie, can you open your eyes for me?” Natasha coos, running her index finger back and forth over her fisted hand, as if petting a small animal. “Just a little bit, c’mon. You can do it.”

Rose lets out a shuddering breath, her eyebrows scrunching together as she slowly flutters her eyes open. Her vision is unfocused and blurry, her mind unable to register where she is now until she feels a warm hand enveloping hers.

“S’done?” Rose asks absently, wearily, and Natasha swallows down the lump in her throat as she helps her out of her shirt, using it to pat the sweat that covered her body. She squirms violently at first, but eventually settles when she feels the phantom pains evaporating at the light brush of fabric against her skin.

“It was just a dream, Rosie. You’re not there anymore, you’re safe at home with me.” Natasha breathes, shuffling closer to her daughter and she brings her little hand up to her lips, kissing her dimpled fist. “Just the two of us in the room, I promise. Can you look at Mama? Can you see me?”

Rose hums noncommittally, blinking a few times to make sure that her surroundings weren’t the cold concrete confines of her cell but rather in the soft security of a sturdy bed and glow stars above the ceiling. Her eyes track her adoptive mother, spotting a small smile growing on her lips as she meets her gaze.

“Hi, Rosie,” Natasha opens her arm up and she wastes no time in melding herself against her chest, heaving ribs against hers. “Shh, all over now.”

“S’not real?” Rose husks out, bringing her hand up to swipe at her face. Natasha drops her head down, shaking her head against her sweat matted hair. “M-my back, they—,”

“I know,” Natasha doesn’t want her to finish her sentence, doesn’t want to hear the words from someone so young. She uses her own shirt to wipe the tears and saliva from the little girl’s face, and she instinctively leans into her touch. “It’s not real. You...does it still hurt?” 

Rose shakes her head, but she tentatively hunches her back to make sure.

Natasha knows that even though she had calmed down, attempting to make her go back to sleep again didn’t seem to be in the cards tonight. 

“That’s good,” She exhales, kissing Rose’s forehead as she gently rubs her bare back, and she lets out a soft sigh at the sensation. She feels her damp shorts against her thigh, and a quick whiff confirms that she must’ve wet herself rather than sweat soaking her clothes. “I’m going to have to clean you up, Rosie. Okay?”

Rose only nods against her chest, her arms clasping around her neck indicating that she didn’t want to be put down. Natasha carefully extracts the both of them from the bed, careful to step around the broken glass as she wraps an arm around her back and another below her. She makes her way to her personal bathroom and quickly discards her shorts, having half a mind to bring out the pull ups Friday had ordered from the first supply run. As they wait for the tub to fill up, Natasha drops to her knees in front of Rose’s seated form on the toilet seat.

“Would you like to have a snack after this?” Natasha asks, and Rose cocks her head to the side.

“But it’s not snack time,” Rose sniffles despite her want, and Natasha fights the urge to smile. “S’dark. Still sleepy time.”

“Sometimes when I wake up when it’s still supposed to be sleepy time, a snack helps. Something light, like a sandwich and warm milk,” Natasha says, trying to entice her. “Would you like that?”

Rose thinks about it for a moment before settling on a small nod. When the tub is halfway full, Natasha turns the water off and lifts Rose up to plop her in, but she doesn’t make any move to relinquish her hold.

“You need to let go, Rosie.”

“In with me?” Rose hides her face into her neck, seemingly embarrassed by her request. “Please, Mama?”

She knows she’s defenseless whenever she uses her name, and even when she doesn’t, there’s still nothing she wouldn’t do to make her feel better. Natasha kisses the side of her head before muttering a soft ‘okay’, setting her down to remove her own clothes. She gathers her back in her arms and slowly lowers the both of them down in the tub, leaning back and allowing Rose to drape lazily against her body, her head resting against her chest. They were completely skin to skin, and Natasha has never felt closer to her daughter than she did in that moment. 

She feels Rose’s hand splay against her collarbone, and she turns her head to press her lips against the inside of her wrist. Rose frowns when her hand travels a fraction lower, her fingers feeling the smooth, puckered skin of a scar.

“Hurt?” Rose asks, her voice low. Natasha hums, and Rose lifts her head up to brush her lips against it, paying back the countless kisses she’s given her.

“Not anymore.”

Natasha cups her hand under the water and Rose sighs in contentment when she feels small streams trickling against her back. She coos and wriggles impossibly closer against her mother, wrapping her arms around her middle under the warm water.

They stay like that for what seemed to be hours, time stretching on and reveling in the comfort of simply holding each other. Eventually, Natasha makes quick but gentle work of properly cleansing after the leisurely soak, wrapping the both of them in towels before moving to change in her room. She puts on a a pair of joggers and an old t-shirt herself before pulling out another one for Rose, the hem reaching her knees. She tells her to stay put for a bit as she cleans up the broken glass, strips the sheets from Rose’s bed and takes out a pair of pull ups from her bottom drawer.

“Here, I want you to wear these just in case,” Natasha explains, and Rose compliantly steps into them, shifting a bit at the foreign sensation when it settles on her hips. “Comfy?”

“Fluffy,” Rose gives her a small smile, and Natasha ruffles her hair before lifting her up to sit on the counter.

“I’ll warm up some milk, do you still want a sandwich? You can have something else if you’d like,” Natasha offers, and Rose swings her legs back and forth as she weighs her options.

“Peanut butter?” Rose asks, and she nods.

“Girl after my own heart,” Natasha smiles, preparing a plate with eight sandwich quarters and two glasses of warm milk. She puts Rose down first and hands her the plate before grabbing the cups. “Follow me, I know where we can eat.”

Rose dutifully follows Natasha like a little duckling, stepping carefully to not jolt the food in her hands. She sits cross legged in front of a dark glass panel, putting the glasses down on the floor before patting her lap, which Rose settles into without hesitation.

“S’dark, Mama,” Rose tells her, and Natasha only smiles.

“Morning, Friday. Turn off sleep mode,” Natasha calls out, and Rose quickly follows up with “Please!”

“Good morning, Miss Romanoff, Rose.” Friday’s friendly voice echoes from above them. “And of course.”

The dark coating of the glass panel slowly dissipates until it reveals the orange yellow beginnings of a sunrise ribboning from below. The back field of the compound is still barely illuminated, but it wouldn’t take long for the light to cast over.

Natasha hears a small, delighted gasp and she feels a small hand circling her wrist in excitement.

“Mama, so pretty!” Rose smiles, looking up at Natasha to make sure she wasn’t missing out on the view. 

"Mmhmm," Natasha agrees, wrapping her arms around Rose and resting her chin on top of her head. "It's pretty nice."

Rose reaches over for a sandwich slice and nibbles on it absentmindedly, enjoying the warmth enveloping her and the sunrise before them.

"You feel better?" Natasha feels the need to ask, wanting to hear the verbal confirmation instead of assuming. "Hopefully no more bad dreams."

She knows that's a long shot, that it'll take more than a while for her to get over her nightmares and triggers since she hasn't fully gotten over her own demons herself, but she still allows herself the hope that she can give her enough love to make her forget the darkness of her early years.

"Happy now, Mama," Rose tells her honestly, reaching over to sip at her milk. She feels her eyelids grow heavy from the early morning exertions, and she snuggles deeper into her hold. "You make me happy, always."

Natasha inhales sharply, closing her eyes tight.

All her doubts are thrown out the window at her words. If she says she makes her happy, by hell, would she hold on to that confession for as long as she can.

"You want to know something, Rosie? You've made me so much happier too." 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request from MarvelObsessedgirl13: Maybe a chapter where she gets sick and doesn’t understand why people care about her, as she’s never had it before?
> 
> Most definitely a sickfic, but made a few personal touches with the latter part of the request. Set a few days after Rose’s rescue.

“She’s technically unable to get sick, but she’ll feel symptoms of a really bad flu for the first couple of days while the antibiotics work their way in.” Helen explains, and Natasha simply nods.

A few days after Rose's initial check up at the tower, they've managed to do a bit of bloodwork (something that none of them particularly enjoyed) and Helen had prescribed antibiotics to help flush the toxins and chemical enhancers that HYDRA's been injecting into her body.

“Could she still get sick even when everything’s flushed out?”

“I don’t believe so,” Helen looks back at her notes on the table. “Her immune system seems to be enhanced, I’m just anticipating how her body will react to the counter-medication given that she’s rather tiny. She’s three, correct?”

“Three and seven months,” Natasha corrects, having memorized information from Rose’s file. “Bruce said the same thing.”

Helen gives her an almost amused look, but she’s quick to neutralize it before Natasha could react. “Underweight as well, I’ve noticed. Does she have a strong appetite?”

“I don’t necessarily have a point of reference,” Natasha retorts hotly, toying with the bottle of medicine Helen gave to her beforehand. “She eats fast, I think she’s still afraid that I might take it away from her. But she finishes whatever I put in front of her, if that helps.”

“That’s good,” Helen nods, scribbling it down in her notes. “Make sure she takes the medicine after dinner. Just a teaspoonful, it’s rather potent.”

“What if she spits it out? Can I give her another one?”

“Unlikely. I made it strawberry flavored,” Helen smiles, and Natasha cracks a small one in return. “But if she does spit it out, you can give her another half dose.”

“Alright,” Natasha nods, looking down at the bottle in her hands. “For how long?”

“A week and a half, then I’d like to check up on her again,” Helen frowns a bit at the memory of their first meeting. “I don’t think she’d feel the same, though.”

Natasha lets out a laugh.

“To be honest, none of us are keen to see you.”

“Completely understandable,” Helen returns brightly, not at all offended. “But she’s my littlest patient. I’m not here all the time but it’s nice to see a little one roaming around. Even if she did try to bite my arm.”

“She’s wary of anyone in coats, I know I was,”  Still am,  Natasha thinks. “Come in casual when you see her?”

“I’ll make sure of it,” Helen nods. “Do you have any other questions?”

“I know you’re not a pediatrician, but apart from her weight, is she hitting all the markers for her age? Friday sent over bottles and pull ups and I know she’s potty trained to an extent but is she too old for those?”

“Children who have experienced trauma sometimes regress, so that might mean bedwetting or needing a bit more help with things they know how to do like eating,” Helen explains, leaning against the desk. “It’s important that you’re patient and allow her to give in to that, and help her when she needs or asks for it. I’m not sure about the bottle since she’s over the age of needing it but not over the age of wanting it as a comfort item, though it’s highly unlikely that she had those in that cell. The pull ups will come in handy for sure, it’s good to have those in case.”

“So, that’s a yes to both?”

“Try the bottle, see if she likes it. Again, you’ve mentioned that she hasn’t had a life outside that facility so it’s good to try out things even if you feel that she’s too old for them.”

Natasha checks her watch. Rose should be awake from her nap soon.

“Got it,” Natasha stands up, mulling over the information Helen had given her. “I need to go, I only came here to pick up the medicine. Thanks for...everything else.”

“You’ve already got a protective streak. It’s good on you.”

“I’m just watching her until CPS can find a good placement,” Natasha says almost defensively. “Plus, I found her, so she’s my responsibility.”

“Alright,” Helen replies in a knowing tone, but Natasha doesn’t snap back since she knows she’s more attached than she’s willing to admit. “See you both soon.”

When Natasha goes back to her floor, Friday’s voice greets her before she could step out of the elevator.

“Hello, Miss Romanoff. Rose is awake and is in the kitchen,” Natasha swears she hears a hint of amusement in the AI’s voice. “You might want to proceed with caution.”

“How ominous, Friday.”

“I have been monitoring Rose’s vitals and it takes longer than necessary for her heart rate to come down when she is startled,” Friday responds cooly, and Natasha nods, making sure to walk with a heavier step to let Rose know that she was approaching. She looks behind the kitchen island and finds Rose with her hand mid-plunge into the peanut butter jar, with half of the contents already smeared around her mouth and neck.

She bites back a laugh and the urge to take a photo.

“What do we have here?” Natasha crouches down to her level, and Rose is frozen in shock and fear at being caught red handed. “Looks like you've helped yourself to a snack.”

Natasha makes sure to keep her voice light, letting her know that she isn't angry in the slightest. Rose doesn’t move an inch, but when Natasha reaches for the jar, she drops it to the floor and hugs her knees close to her chest.

“Were you hungry when you woke up, Rosie?” Natasha asks, and Rose dared to peek at her through her knees, giving her an almost imperceptible nod before curling back into a ball.

“No harm done,” Natasha tells her, sitting down on the floor in front of her. She looks at the jar and smiles a bit. “Do you like how it tastes? It’s good, right? It’s my favorite.”

Rose raises her head again, mostly curious now. She gives a tentative nod, warier this time as she waits for the other shoe to drop.

“I’ll make sure to stock up on some more then, so we have a jar each,” Natasha stands up to grab a clean dishcloth and runs it under the faucet, squeezing out the excess before sitting back down, a bit closer to the little girl now. “Can I clean you up?”

“I can,” Rose offers feebly, reaching for the washcloth. Natasha places it on the hand without peanut butter and she haphazardly wipes it across her face, effectively smearing it around some more before returning it to her.

“You missed a couple spots. May I?” Natasha waits until she sees her nod, and she gently rubs it against her lips, cheeks, and neck. She looks down at her closed fist that was still covered in peanut butter. “I can wipe this up with the towel, or you can finish off your snack as long as you still have room for dinner. What will it be?”

Rose’s cheeks flush pink before slowly bringing her hand up and sucking on her fist. Natasha lets out a chuckle and before she could stop herself, drops a kiss on the top of her stubbly head before standing up and placing the towel by the sink, leaving Rose stunned in her spot.

After dinner, Natasha takes the medicine from the counter and brings it back to the dining table, sitting next to Rose as she measures out a dosage.

“This is medicine, Rosie. Dr. Cho said that your body needed a bit of help to remove the bad things they’ve put in you, and this does the trick,” Natasha says, giving her a watered down version of the truth since she doesn’t want to come across as untrustworthy. “Can you open up, please?”

Rose stares at the golden brown syrup on the spoon, sniffing it first before opening her mouth a little and allowing Natasha slip the spoon between her lips. She swallows immediately, smacking her lips at the sweet taste and opening her mouth again for another.

“Good job,” Natasha laughs, capping the medicine. “Just once a day, Rosie. But it’s good to know you like it. Makes things easier for me.”

The next day, Rose wakes up with chills. She’s not sure what’s happening to her body, but she’s confused why the room is so cold, why her head feels heavy, why she suddenly can’t breathe through her nose and she can’t help but feel as if this was a punishment from the peanut butter incident, that Natasha had purposefully done this to make her realize her bad behavior.

She deserves this, she thinks, but she’s mostly relieved that she hasn’t been hit yet in this new place. She swallows tentatively, her mouth feeling like it’s stuffed with cotton and her throat feels like nails were going down rather than saliva.

She feels helpless in this state, and as much as she wants Natasha to come in and give her kisses on the head, she knows that she’s the one who made her feel like this and quickly understands that it’s not real. It’s all just for show.

Before she could do anything else, Natasha comes in and frowns at her shivering state, rushing forward to place the back of her hand on her forehead.

“Friday, bring the temp in the room higher,” Natasha says quickly before slowly pulling the covers down, tuts at the sweat-dampened shirt despite her feeling cold. "Shh, it's alright."

“Friday, vitals please,” Natasha prompts, standing up to fetch her a change of clothes from the drawer.

“Rose’s internal temperature is higher than average at 101 degrees Fahrenheit,” Friday rattles on while Natasha coaxes a limp Rose out of her clothes, wiping her sweat off before dressing her in a light sleep dress. “Heart rate is higher than usual but still within average range.”

Natasha looks over at Rose’s poorly state, leaning forward to place a kiss on the top of her head before picking her up in her arms, pressing her against her body and gently stroking her back, careful of the almost healed lash that lined across it.

“I know, I know, it doesn't feel good," Natasha hums when she hears her whimper, but at her gentle stroking, she feels Rose tense up under her palm, her stomach lurching and quickly emptying its contents over Natasha’s shoulder.

Rose doesn’t remember ever feeling this bad in her short life, and feeling overwhelmed at the foreign experiences, promptly squirms in Natasha’s hold as she bursts into tears.

“Hey, shh, it’s okay,” Natasha soothes, her body going into autopilot as she carries Rose over to the bathroom, ignoring the putrid smell of vomit staining the back of her shirt. She puts her down near the toilet, squatting down next to her and rubbing her back with more purpose. “I know that isn’t all of it. It’s okay, I’ve got you.”

Rose heaves again, crying as she throws up what’s left in her stomach, then drops to her knees once she’s finished. Natasha fetches her a cup of water for gargling, teaching her how to do so and allowing her to spit a few times to get the taste out of her mouth.

“Better?” Natasha asks, cupping her cheek. Rose closes her eyes as her touch, trying to ignore the nagging feeling at the back of her head to stay away from her. She nods once.

“Alright, good,” Natasha offers her a small smile. “Could you go ahead to the living room? I’ll just clean myself up and we’ll see what we can do for lunch, alright?”

“No breakfast?” Rose asks in a small voice, but then quickly brings her hands up to cover her mouth for speaking out of line.

“It’s a little late for breakfast, I let you sleep in today since I thought you might’ve needed it,” Natasha explains, then stands up when she couldn’t handle the smell any further. “Go on, now. I’m stinky.”

Rose quickly scuttles away, and Natasha lets out a deep sigh once she’s out of sight. It hasn't even been an hour since she's been awake and so much has already happened, making her feel like she's already in over her head at what she's been allowing herself to consider since the first day she got here.

Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she makes quick work of changing into new clothes and cleaning up the bit of sick that landed on the floor in Rose's—the guest bedroom, and when she comes out to the living room, she spots Rose curled up on the couch with the throw blanket that was draped over the back of it wrapped around her shoulders.

She looks so much smaller like this, and Natasha feels a surge of protectiveness come over her, knowing that despite her doubts on her caring capabilities, she wouldn't hesitate protecting the little girl the best that she can.

"Hey, Rosie," Natasha greets, squatting in front of the couch so she could be eye level with her. "You comfy here? Are you hungry?"

Rose shakes her head at the prospect of food, trying to make herself even smaller by snuggling deeper into the blanket with only a bit of her forehead peeking out.

"Alright," Natasha stands up, patting her head through the blanket before moving towards the kitchen. She pauses once she gets to the island counter.

"Friday, chicken soup should be safe, right? That's a thing sick people eat?" Natasha asks, rummaging through her pantry for something easy to hold down. She pulls out a box of saltine crackers and a can of ready made chicken soup, and when she turns around, she's met with a little blanket-wrapped girl bumping against her thigh.

"Oh! Changed your mind?" Natasha chuckles, lifting her up into her arms, making sure the blanket's still securely around her. "It's not from scratch, but it'll do."

"S'it done?" Rose sniffles, rubbing her eye with the blanket. "I good now. Don't like 'nymore, please."

"I'm just about to heat it up, Rosie," Natasha furrows her eyebrows, hiking her higher up on her hip. "What do you mean don't like anymore? You want something else?"

"No," Rose drawls out, a hitch in her voice. "Me sick. You punish because I eat 'nut butter. Won't eat without you watching 'gain. Don't like sick, please. I good. I good now, promise."

"Oh, no, baby, no," Natasha puts down the cap of soup to hold her with both arms and shifts her to her front. "I'm not punishing you by making you sick, I'm sorry for not explaining it to you. It's the medicine, Dr. Cho said you might feel sick for a few days while the medicine works to fight the chemicals the bad men put in your body. It doesn't feel good at all but I promise it's not going to last."

Rose looks at her as if contemplating the truth in her answer, and Natasha waits patiently until Rose lays her head against her shoulder and wraps her hand behind her neck, a silent sign of acceptance.

"Don't like it," Rose whines, and Natasha turns her head to the side to nuzzle her nose against her nape.

"I know, Rosie, just for a little while, you're doing such a good job," Natasha murmurs into her warm skin. "I'll try to make things as comfy for you as I can, okay?"

Rose doesn't respond, her hand only moving up slightly to play with the ends of her hair.

"Nat?" A voice calls out and Natasha snaps her head up, instinctively tightening her hold on Rose. Her eyes land on Bruce, who was walking towards them slowly with a paper bag in his hand. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"Just clearing things up,” Natasha cocks her head towards the child, slightly loosening her hold. "What brings you here?"

"Cho updated me on Rose's medication, is she feeling alright?"

"Fever, nausea, the works," Natasha shrugs. "She's managing."

"And you?" Bruce raises his eyebrows.

"About the same."

"That's good," Bruce offers awkwardly before settling the paper bag on the counter. "Cho told me about the side effects and I thought I'd drop off lunch today for her—the both of you, I mean."

Natasha frees up a hand to drag the bag closer to her and peeks in to find a large microwaveable container of chicken noodle soup.

"Just in time, I was about to heat some up from a can," Natasha gives him a genuine smile. "Thanks, Bruce."

"There's also fever cooling patches in there too, you stick them on her forehead," Bruce adds, shrinking a little when he sees Natasha raise an eyebrow at his second statement. "It's strange but they should help."

"Got it," Natasha nods. "You wanna stay for lunch? I doubt she'll be able to have much."

"Oh, no, I just came by to drop it off," Bruce starts to step back, but not before leaning forward to talk to the bundled form in Natasha's arms. "I hope you feel better, Rose."

Rose looks at him for a moment before burying her face into Natasha's shoulder, frustratedly breathing through her mouth. Natasha shakes her head and Bruce only smiles, saying goodbye again before retreating into the elevator.

Natasha sits Rose down on the countertop as she takes the container out, spooning some into a bowl before dragging a barstool to sit in front of her.

"I know you're not hungry, but you need something in your stomach. Just a little bit," Natasha tells her, gently blowing on a spoonful before bringing it near Rose's lips. She allows her to feed her a few spoonfuls until she clamps her mouth shut on the next one.

"Good job, Rosie. We can heat the rest of this later tonight," Natasha places her still half full bowl in the sink, and Rose looks at her as if she'd grown two heads.

"Hafta finish. Can't waste," Rose croaks out, but makes no move to reach for it since she can't imagine stomaching another spoonful. "They get mad if I waste."

"Hey, look at me," Natasha says, cupping her cheeks with both hands. "You're not there anymore, and I don't expect you to finish your food, especially now that you're feeling sick. You eat when you're hungry and stop when you're full. Can you remember that for me?"

"S'okay if I don't finish?" Rose asks just to make sure, trying to make sense of it all. Natasha nods in confirmation.

"Yes, Rosie. It's okay."

Later that evening, they do eventually heat up the rest of the soup with Rose being able to stomach a bit more than earlier. When Natasha brings out a spoon and the medicine bottle, she clamps her mouth shut, not wanting to get even sicker that she already is.

“I know, I know,” Natasha sympathizes, still carrying on with pouring out a dosage on the teaspoon. “But you need to take this. I don’t think you’ll feel as bad tomorrow.”

Rose stares at her dubiously, her frown deepening when Natasha brings the spoon closer to her lips. She tries to nudge her bottom lip out with the rim of the spoon, but Rose shakes her head stubbornly, covering her mouth with her hands.

“I don’t think so,” Natasha chuckles, circling her hand around her wrist to try to coax it away. “What will it take for you to drink this for me, hmm?”

Rose ponders on it thoughtfully for a few moments, then with her lips still sucked in, she pats her palm over her mouth then taps the top of her head.

“Wha— _oh_ ,” Natasha exhales, quickly getting the hint. She nods in confirmation and Rose immediately opens wide for the medicine. Natasha leans over and places several kisses on the top of her head, then travels down to press a few over her forehead and cheeks, making her giggle softly.

“Good girl, Rosie. Is that all you wanted?” Natasha asks, her tone light. Rose nods, nudging the top of her head against her chin and she laughs as she carries her to the bathroom to get her ready for bed.

To both of their relief, Rose feels slightly better the next morning with a low-grade fever and a stronger appetite. She mostly takes naps throughout the day as the fatigue settles in, and Natasha trains during these times with her coming back up every once in a while to check on Rose and prepare their meals.

Rose wakes after her third nap of the day, feeling both brave and particularly clingy as her first instinct was to look for Natasha the minute she woke up. She takes the blanket she’s claimed as hers and wraps it around her body before padding out of the room, spotting Natasha and Steve chatting in the kitchen.

She makes a beeline towards Natasha, burying her face into the side of her thigh.

“Someone’s finally awake,” Natasha muses, bringing her hand down to cup the back of her head. Rose presses against her palm. “Had a good nap, hmm? How are we feeling?”

Without another word, Rose pulls an arm out from under her blanket cocoon and grasps at the hem of her shirt, pulling it slightly. Natasha picks her up and settles her on her hip, the little girl resting her head against her shoulder.

“She looks cozy,” Steve smiles, and Rose glances at him at the corner of her eye. “Hi, Rose.”

“You wanna say hi to Steve?" Natasha murmurs near the shell of her ear, and she responds by hiding her face in the crook of her neck, feeling little puffs of air from her breathing through her mouth. "She's still a bit sick. Doesn't really feel up to doing much."

"That's not fun," Steve shakes his head, then squints his eyes. "If she's still congested, let a hot shower run and let her sit in the steam. Helps with the airways."

"Is that an old timey remedy, grandpa?" Natasha teases, earning a pointed look from Steve. “But yeah, sure. We’ll try that.”

“Na’,” Rosie mumbles against her neck. “Eat?”

“Sure thing,” Natasha replies just as softly. She looks back up at Steve who watches them with a small smile. “Gotta feed the kid. You staying?”

“What are we having?”

“Soup for her, it’s all she can hold down as of now,” Natasha sways absentmindedly in her place. “We can order in if you want.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Steve says, looking through the assortment of takeout brochures Natasha pulls out before bringing Rose to the living room, sitting down with her on her lap.

“Can you stay here for a little bit while I heat up your food?” Natasha asks, and Rose wraps the blanket around her tighter as she nods, hopping down from her lap and sitting in the corner of the couch.

Natasha turns the TV on to a children’s program, and Rose immediately perks up at the vivid colors playing on the screen. Natasha lingers for a few moments before returning to the kitchen, and Steve holds up a leaflet for Chinese takeout when she's in his line of sight.

“This good with you?” Steve asks, and Natasha gives him a nod before plucking out the can of chicken soup from her pantry, pulling the tab off and transferring it into a saucepan.

“I need to get her some toys,” Natasha thinks out loud. “I don’t feel comfortable setting her in front of a television.”

“Mmhmm,” Steve says, slightly amused but mostly intrigued at this facet of Natasha he’s witnessing. It fascinates him to no end. “Fried dumplings, right? What kind of toys?”

“Yup, extra sauce on the side. I don’t know, just something tangible,” Natasha stirs the soup, the smell starting to waft through the air. “Also, Friday, could you put in a request to stock my pantry with fresh produce every weekend? I need to introduce Rosie to more food.”

“I’ve uploaded a catalogue of seasonal produce for you to select from,” Friday chimes in helpfully. “I’ll have them scheduled for delivery on Saturday morning.”

“Rosie?” Steve raises an eyebrow, and Natasha hopes he mistakes the blush that rises in her cheeks as heat from the stove. “Nat...”

“I’m not attached,” Natasha says quickly, but her defensiveness gives way to the truth. “I just...want to do right by her while she’s here, while she’s mine to take care of.”

“I was about to say it’s a cute nickname. It suits her,” Steve smiles gently, looking back at Rose who was still watching TV in the living room, having moved to sit on the floor now. “Nat, you don’t have to do this alone, you know. I’m happy to help however I can.”

“You can start by ordering our food, I’m almost done heating this up,” Natasha deflects, but flashes him a grateful look before pouring the contents of the saucepan into a bowl. Steve quickly does as he’s told, and tells Natasha that they should have it within half an hour.

“I’m never going to get tired of saying that food is better this time around,” Steve grins, sitting down by the dining table. “Has Rose—Rosie tried anything she really likes?”

“We’re still in the exploratory stage at this point. Her file doesn’t state anything about allergies so I’m staying with bland food for the meantime, chicken soup being the most flavor she’s had so far,” Natasha grabs a spoon from a drawer and brings the bowl over to the table, breaking out into a smile as a memory pops into her head. “I caught her literally with her hand in a peanut butter jar the other day. She likes that one a lot. I wish I took a picture.”

“If I may,” Friday interrupts, and a second later her phone pings. “From my monitoring.”

“Oh, look at this,” Natasha smiles at a clear capture of Rose grinning at her first handful of peanut butter. She turns the phone for Steve to see, and he chuckles at the sight. “This is great.”

“She’s definitely one to watch,” Steve nods. Natasha stands up and he watches as she makes her way to Rose, squatting down to her level and saying something low enough that it’s imperceptible even with his enhanced hearing. Rose grabs Natasha’s hand tightly as she stands up from the floor, walking back to the table hand in hand.

“Steve’s staying with us for dinner,” Natasha tells her, setting her down on the seat next to her. “I have your food here, do you want to try eating by yourself?”

Rose looks at Steve warily before shaking her head, circling her hand around Natasha’s wrist.

“You,” Rose whispers, squirming slightly in her seat. Natasha turns Rose’s chair so that she’s facing her, and she takes the bowl in one hand and the spoon in the other. She feeds her after gently blowing on each spoonful, and halfway through the bowl, Friday lets them know that their food is ready for pick up downstairs. Steve quickly excuses himself and Rose relaxes visibly once he’s out of sight.

“Does he make you nervous, Rosie?” Natasha asks, wiping the bit of soup that spilled on her chin. “It’s okay, I won’t get mad.”

“Big,” Rose tells her in a small voice, sniffling when the heat from the soup unclogs her nose. “Scary.”

“He’s big alright, but he’s very nice,” Natasha says. “He just wants to be friends with you, sort of like we are.”

Rose scrunches her eyebrows a bit, but Natasha offers her another spoonful and she opens her mouth wide before she could say anything. Steve returns to their floor with a bag filled with takeout containers, and he lays them all out on the table, holding back a laugh at how wide Rose’s eyes get at the spread.

“This is how he stays big, Rosie,” Natasha whispers loudly, grabbing a pair of chopsticks from the bag and setting it next to her. “Most of this is his.”

“Can finish all?” Rose asks incredulously, and Steve gives her a wink.

“You bet,” Steve grins. “You wanna try some?”

Rose, slightly overwhelmed with the amount of choices and smells, shakes her head, grabbing Natasha’s wrist again.

“Hey, it’s okay. Last one,” Natasha says, and she feeds her the last spoonful of soup. “Good job. Stay here, I’ll go get your medicine.”

Rose looks at Natasha pleadingly, not wanting her to leave her with Steve, but when she turns to look at him, he quickly pulls a funny face, balancing his chopsticks between his nose and pursed lips, making her break out into a small smile.

“You like that one? How about this,” Steve crosses his eyes and flares his nostrils, effectively eliciting a giggle out of Rose.

“Told you,” Natasha chuckles, sitting back down and measuring her dosage. Rose sobers as she eyes the medicine warily again, but when she sees her tap her lips, her mouth opens like a baby bird waiting for food. She slips the spoon into her mouth before putting it down and gathering her into her arms, pressing little kisses all over her face and making her squeal in delight.

“That’s a good girl, Rosie,” Natasha praises, not minding the face-splitting smile that was plastered on Steve’s face. She focuses on the sound of her unbridled laughter, making it her new personal mission to hear it more often. She settles her on her lap after a few moments, dropping one last kiss on the top of her head. “You alright here? Let me just get a few bites in and we’ll get you ready for bed.”

Natasha makes quick work of grabbing her orders and eating for a few minutes, chewing and chopsticks scraping against cardboard the only sounds filling the room.

“I need that laugh as my morning alarm, by the way,” Steve brings up, grinning as he remembers the absolute joy he witnessed between the two of them. “She’s good for you, Nat. And I can tell you’re good for her, too.”

“You think so?” Natasha asks, partially out of curiosity, mostly out of needing to hear reassurance. Steve only nods, but he gives her a meaningful look as he does before biting into a spring roll.

They finish up with dinner with Steve offering to clear the table as Natasha helps Rose wash up for bed. She tucks her in and bids her goodnight before stalking out of the room, seeing Steve out of her floor before sitting down on a barstool by the counter.

She creates a mental to-do list, asking Friday to order a handful of things for delivery, standing up to tidy around her living space after a while before getting herself ready for bed. As she’s putting on her sleep shirt, she hears a door click open and she immediately hastens her pace, grabbing the gun by her dresser and stepping quietly through the door only to find Rose sucking her thumb as she pads towards the living room, grabbing the throw blanket from the floor with her free hand. She looks around before pressing the fabric against her cheek and walking a leisurely pace back to her room.

Placing the gun back in her dresser, she makes her way towards Rose's room to check on her and spots her on top of the covers, the throw blanket wrapped tightly around her curled up form, staring out with her thumb between her lips.

"Rosie?" Natasha calls out tentatively, and in a flash, Rose yanks her thumb out of her mouth, attempting to scramble under the covers but she struggles slightly against the throw blanket, only halting when she feels Natasha's hand on her shoulder. "Hey, hey. It's alright. Couldn't sleep?"

Rose lets out a soft whine, shaking her head. Natasha remembers Helen's words and she excuses herself quickly to grab the bottles still in their packaging from a kitchen cupboard. She takes one out, her heart pounding in her chest as she rinses it before filling it halfway with milk. She pops it in the microwave for a few seconds before returning to the room, sitting down on the other side of the bed.

Rose looks at the bottle curiously and Natasha suddenly feels stupid for taking it out in the first place.

"It...I thought it might help you settle down, and you don't need to sit up or anything," Natasha tells her, offering her the bottle. "I saw that you still suck your thumb and this is sort of like that. Do you want to try? See if you like it?" 

Rose doesn't make a move to grab at it, too comfortable in her self-made cocoon, but her eyes stare at the bottle almost longingly. Natasha, indulging herself, sits cross legged on the bed before taking Rose's bundled form into her arms, cradling her head against the crook of her elbow. She grabs the bottle from the nightstand and slips the nipple between her lips, watching as she gives a few tentative sucks before sighing contentedly, snuggling deeper in her hold as she starts to drink eagerly from the bottle.

"You seem to like it a lot," Natasha can't help but smile wistfully, her heart filling to the brim with warmth. She hums a little tune as she drinks, noticing her eyelids slowly drooping as the minutes go by. "There we go."

Natasha pulls the bottle away, wiping a bit of milk on her chin away with her thumb. She ghosts her fingers over her features as she watches her sleep for a few more moments, leaning down to press a long kiss against her forehead, her own eyes fluttering close at the overwhelming feelings that were threatening to wash over her.

She unwraps the throw blanket around her, earning a small whimper from Rose, and quickly tucks her under the covers and places her new security blanket over it. She makes sure she's fully asleep before dimming the lights further, grabbing the empty bottle from the nightstand and stalking out of the room.

Natasha knew in that moment that she had become more than attached. She had almost instantaneously become devoted into taking care of Rose, and she can't help but dread the day when they place her with a complete family—the only thing that she simply cannot provide. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose celebrates her first fourth birthday.

Natasha had called for a meeting in the common area, and the compound’s residents arrive within fifteen minutes of receiving the invite, knowing that the Black Widow usually never calls in unless it’s absolutely urgent.

“Why aren’t we using the conference room?” Steve asks, and Natasha shakes her head.

“It’s not that kind of meeting,” She starts, giving her teammates a quick once over before carrying on. “It’s Rose’s birthday in two weeks. I need to assign tasks.”

Natasha had realized that Rose was turning four within the month, and even though she’s mentioned it to her daughter, the concept of celebrating age was too foreign for her to grasp and doesn’t think much of it despite her trying to warm her up to the idea with the promise of presents and balloons.

Even though she’ll be celebrating her fourth birthday, Natasha knows this is essentially her first. And she’s determined to make it count.

“Jesus, Nat, I thought it was an emergency,” Tony pipes up, but was acutely aware of how much this means to her. “What’s the plan?”

“Nothing fancy, I don’t want to overwhelm her. Sam, can you take care of the food? I’ll order the cake. Steve, decorations. Definitely include a banner, and not themed, maybe primary colors,” Natasha lists on, checking her notes. She continues to delegate more tasks, grateful at how seriously they’re taking her.

“Alright, mom of the year, what about gifts? Any parental restrictions?" Clint raises an eyebrow, and Natasha turns to look at him.

"You all know what she likes. Just please, nothing that jumps out or excessively loud, she's still skittish around those," Natasha lets them know, and they discuss details further before she allows them to disperse.

As the day of Rose's birthday draws closer, Natasha constantly mulls over what to gift to her daughter but steps back and doubts her choices every time she thinks she's already settled on one. On the eve of Rose's birthday, she reminds her of the significance of tomorrow and allows Rose to sleep in her room, her tiny body curled up against her.

"If you could have anything you want, what would ask for?" Natasha muses as her fingers run across her back. Rose, half asleep, mulls over her question thoughtfully and snuggles closer.

"I dunno," Rose yawns, and Natasha frowns. "What 'bout you, Mama? What you ask for?"

"I've always wanted a baby girl," Natasha says honestly, and Rose looks up at her in surprise. "And I already got you. So I think I already have everything I want."

"Really?" Rose whispers, and Natasha's heart grips, nodding as she presses her forehead against the crown of her head.

"I don't know what a Mama was before," Rose mumbles into her clavicle, causing Natasha to hold on to her that much tighter. "But when you got me and became my Mama you take care of me and give me lots of love and kisses and holds and I really like that. I just want you to do that always."

Rose, despite constant verbal encouragement, still struggles to voice out her thoughts, and Natasha feels proud that she's managed to confess this to her, even if it does shatter hear heart in the best possible way.

"I can promise you now that you're always going to be loved and kissed and held," Natasha tells her, dropping a few kisses on the top of her head for good measure. "If that's all you want. I can do that, I can give that to you."

"Yay," Rose whispers, making Natasha chuckle. "Mama, sleepy time now. Good night, love you."

"Love you too, baby," Natasha continues stroking her back to coax her to sleep. "Good night."

When they wake the next morning, Natasha is surprised that Rose had woken up earlier than her, her eyes opening to warm weight pressing over her torso.

"Mama, I'm four."

"Hmm, yes you are," Natasha sits up to embrace her properly. "Happy birthday, Rosie."

"Happy birthday, Mama," Rose greets back, earning a hearty laugh from Natasha and effectively waking her up. She gathers her into her arms, and they stay there for a few more moments.

"No, Rosie, it's only your birthday. You turn a year older today," Natasha explains patiently, smoothing her hair down. Over the last five months, her hair has grown to touch the tips of her ears in soft ringlets, and Natasha enjoys running her hands through them just as much as Rose enjoys the fact that she gets to grow it out this time around. "You're practically a big girl."

Rose frowns at this. "But you say you want baby girl. Don't wanna be big girl, Mama."

"Rosie, Rosie," Natasha grins, hugging her tight. "Even if you get older, you're always going to be my baby girl."

Rose seemed to be appeased by this, preening at the affection she was being showered with the first thing in the morning. They have a simple breakfast and Natasha lets her know that they'll be spending the day out together, taking her to the toy store today to pick out her gifts.

Natasha puts on a simple disguise, contouring her cheeks slightly and pulls her hair into a low ponytail. She opts for a summer dress, prompting Rose to want to wear something similar as well.

“Same, Mama!” Rose grins, letting the red dress billow around her knees.

Natasha holds her hand as they enter the toy store, and her eyes widen at the bright displays that lined the shelves. She’s already amassed a small collection of legos, plush dolls, and various transportation toy vehicles, mostly from her mother and a few from the rest of the team, but she hadn’t thought about taking her to choose for herself until now.

“Alright, you can pick out two things that you like,” Natasha squats down to her level. “Do you already have something in mind?”

“Have lotsa toys at home,” Rose tells her, furrowing her eyebrows. “Dunno what to get.”

“I know you do, but it’s your birthday and I want to get you something you like,” Natasha reaches to tuck her hair behind her ear. “We can go out here with something or nothing at all, and that’s perfectly fine. But if there’s anything that catches your eye, you can let me know, okay?” 

Rose nods and takes her hand again as they walk aimlessly through the aisles with Natasha purposefully avoiding any staff that looked ready to approach. They turn a corner and Rose points ahead at a Hotwheels race track, gently tugging Natasha towards it.

“I like this one, Mama,” Rose grins. “Like Tony’s cars, and can play race with Wanda too.”

“They do look like his cars, don’t they,” Natasha muses, plucking the box from the shelf and tucks it under her arm. “Let’s get it then. That’s one down, you can get one more.”

“You’re getting her a car set?” A woman pushing a cart asks rudely, glancing at the pair before her eyes dart down to Rose, grimacing at her short hair. “There’s a reason why they have a boys and girls section, hon. The poor thing, you even cut her hair to look like a boy.”

“I don’t think that’s any of your business,” Natasha retorts, her voice low as she reaches for Rose’s hand. “C’mon, Rosie.”

“Wait a second,” The woman squints her eyes, stepping forward to get a closer look. “You’re the Black Widow.”

“I get that a lot,” Natasha replies cooly despite wanting to deck the woman right then and there. “It’s the hair. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to continue shopping with my daughter.”

“You could very well be calling her your son at this point,” _The woman doesn’t seem to have a brain to mouth filter,_ Natasha thinks. “She needs to know her place. The tea party sets are on the other side of the store.”

Rose clutches the front of Natasha’s dress when she sees the woman move closer with her cart.

“Mama,” Rose whimpers out, and sensing Rose’s distress, put the car set down to pick her up in her arms. Natasha quickly walks away to pluck the nearest staffer by the wrist and dragging him back to the aisle.

“This woman has been verbally harassing me and my child,” Natasha lays it on thick, coddling Rose close. She hates bringing attention to herself, but the minute the woman mentioned her daughter, she knew that all bets were off.“Could you take care of this, as I would like to carry on with our day instead of dealing with her nonsense.”

“Excuse me, hon, all I’m saying is that you shouldn’t be telling your little girl that being a tomboy is okay,” The woman bites out, and the man quickly moves in between the two women, starting to usher her away. “Get your hands off me!”

“I’m so sorry for the trouble,” The man quickly apologizes, grasping the woman by the shoulders and walking away. Natasha sighs, picking the box up from the floor and moves to the next aisle, dropping a kiss on the side of Rose’s head to check in with her.

“You alright?” Natasha murmurs, and Rose nods her head. She turns her body and frowns at the box set in her other hand.

“Don’t want ‘nymore, Mama,” Rose whispers back into her neck, and Natasha mentally curses the woman, hating that she didn’t bring Rose out before she could hear another word out of her. “S’okay.”

“But you were so excited when you showed it to me,” Natasha tries to convince her. “Are you sure?”

Rose squirms in her hold, and Natasha puts the box down as she sets Rose on her feet, squatting down to meet her gaze.

“Hey, Rosie, listen to me,” Natasha holds her chin to keep her eyes trained on her. “You can like whatever you want, as long as you’re happy and you enjoy playing with them.”

“I don’t look like a boy,” Rose frowns, patting her hair. “I have now.”

“Yes you do,” Natasha humors her, reaching out to ruffle her curls as well. “It’s just because it’s still short, but that’s not your fault.”

Rose nods, reaching over to pat the box set next to Natasha.

“I still like,” Rose admits, and Natasha leans forward to kiss her forehead. “Can we still get it?”

“Absolutely,” Natasha affirms, picking it up and grabbing her hand. They go through the aisles again but they don’t find anything else that grabbed Rose’s attention, eventually making their way to a vacant counter. Rose is perched on Natasha’s hip as she watches her pay for her new toy.

“Thank you, Mama,” Rose says in a small voice, wrapping her arms around her neck, and Natasha is quick to return the embrace. The cashier gazes up and smiles at the exchange.

“She’s so polite, much nicer than most the kids that come by here,” She tells Natasha, and she can’t help the surge of pride that fills her chest. The cashier plucks a lollipop from the display, scanning it before handing it over to her. “It’s on me.”

“Rosie, she has something for you,” Natasha murmurs, and Rose turns her head to look at her, silently asking for permission. “Go on. It’s a lollipop, Rosie.”

“Candy?” Rose asks near her ear, and Natasha nods, chuckling when she turns again to shyly reach for the treat. “Thank ‘ou.”

“You’re very welcome,” The cashier responds, watching Natasha unwrap the sweet and giving it to Rose, who makes a tentative licks before popping it into her mouth with more enthusiasm. Natasha puts her down, grabbing Rose’s free hand and the gift bag with the other and they walk out of the store in search for an afternoon snack.

They stay out for two more hours, only starting to head back to the compound when she receives a message from Clint that everything’s nearly set up on their floor. On the elevator ride up, Natasha squeezes Rose’s hand.

“Did you have fun today, Rosie?” Natasha asks, and Rose gives her an enthusiastic nod.

“Mmhmm,” Rose grins. “M’excited to play.”

The doors open and Natasha rushes out first, spotting her teammates scattered around the area and quickly turning around to catch her daughter’s reaction.

“Happy birthday, Rosie!” A chorus of voices sound out, and Rose jumps at the volume. Her eyes land on the colored streamers and balloons that decorated their floor, then at the smiling faces of the people she’s grown to know and love.

She squeaks out in surprise before a bright wide smile appears on her face, bursting out into little giggles before running towards Natasha’s waiting arms.

“Mama, s’prise!” Rose’s voice is high and airy, looking around again with watery eyes. “For me?”

“All for you, baby. Happy birthday,” Natasha kisses her cheek soundly, lifting her up and pressing her close against her. “You wanna go say hi to everyone?”

Rose nods, kicking her feet until Natasha sets her down again, making a beeline towards Wanda. She tugs on her dress and she looks down, smiling and squatting down to her level.

“Wanda! Mama got me new cars, can we play later?” Rose asks, her hands on her shoulders as she looks at her earnestly.

“Of course! I would enjoy that very much,” Wanda smiles. “What else did you do today?”

Before Rose could respond, she feels herself being lifted up and thrown up into the air. She gasps loudly, and when she lands safely in the tosser’s arms, she turns around to find Bucky who was wearing a similar smile.

“Happy birthday, little Miss,” Bucky greets, and when Rose kicks her feet, he tosses her up again, eliciting a belly laugh out of the little girl and causing a few eyes to turn to the pair.

“‘Gain, Bucky!” Rose giggles out, just as Natasha calls out from across the room, “Don’t you dare!”

“I don’t think your mama’s on board with it,” Bucky tells her, but winks as he tucks a curl behind her ear. “Later, when she’s not looking.”

Rose gets passed around some more, receiving hugs and high fives from her family until Sam brings out a cake with four lit candles to the dining table. Natasha has her daughter on her lap with the rest of the team surrounding in front of them, a few with their phones out to record the moment.

They sing the customary happy birthday song in unison and Natasha claps Rose’s hands along to the beat, and once they finish, Natasha presses a kiss to her temple.

“Make a wish, Rosie,” Natasha says, and Rose turns her head slightly to look at her.

“But I already got my cars, Mama,” Rose responds innocently, earning a few laughs.

“Any kind of wish, Rosie. Like a wish for life, not just things,” Natasha gently corrects, wrapping her arm around her stomach. “And you don’t have to tell us, can be just for you. Go on, close your eyes.”

Rose does as she’s told, but her eyebrows furrow, seemingly in deep thought. The team wait on patiently, knowing that this was her first time experiencing everything.

“Can I...Mama, can I give you my wish?” Rose says, recalling their conversation from the night before with her eyes still squeezed shut. “I wish for a Mama and I already gots you. Don’t want ‘nything else.”

Natasha looks at her incredulously, ignoring the ‘awws’ that resound in the room. She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes as well.

“Okay,” Natasha breathes out, simply wishing to be able to provide for her daughter the best that she can, for as long as she’s able. “Go, Rosie. Blow out your candles.”

Rose opens her eyes and blows, her cheeks puffing up as she does and blushes when she hears another round of claps and birthday greetings surrounding her.

Natasha gives Bruce the task of slicing the cake to distribute around, and she stands on her feet with Rose in her hold, directing her gaze to the large pile of gifts on the coffee table.

“Look,” Natasha hikes her higher up on her hip. “Those are for you.”

“More s’prise?” Rose gasps, her eyes widening as she takes in the varying sizes of the wrapped gifts, putting her hands on her shoulders as if to keep herself from exploding. “All?”

Natasha simply nods, a smile playing on her lips as Rose gently wiggles around in excitement. “Really, all? Mama, that’s so many!”

“You deserve all of it, baby,” Natasha nuzzles her nose against her cheek. “How’s about we have a bit of cake first before you open them?”

“Biggest slice for the birthday girl,” Sam approaches as if on cue, handing Natasha a plate with a sizable piece and two forks. “How is she?”

“Probably overwhelmed, but definitely happy,” Natasha tells him, smoothing down Rose’s hair. “This is more than I expected, to be honest. You guys did really well.”

“I never do anything half-a...heartedly,” Sam catches himself when Natasha raises an eyebrow. “Plus, that reaction was priceless. It was worth the logistical nightmare.”

“Of food catering?”

“Hey, I’m just trying to respect everyone’s dietary restrictions,” Sam chuckles, and Natasha gives him a genuine smile before finding a vacant seat and setting Rose down on her lap.

“Look, it’s chocolate cake, Rosie,” Natasha hums, eating a bit of it. She hands her a fork and she mimics her movement, grinning when she gets a taste of it.

“This is my fav’rite now,” Rose says, shoveling another piece into her mouth. “Can we have this t’morrow too?”

“If there’s still some left over, and only after finishing your food,” Natasha sets her conditions, but Rose only nods absently as she steadily demolishes the slice.

“Mama,” Rose looks back at Natasha with pleading eyes, and she already knows what she’s about to ask. “One more?”

“That was a really big slice, I don’t want you getting a stomach ache,” Natasha tells her, and Rose almost deflates until she sees Tony sliding another slice towards her.

“Rite of passage,” Tony winks, and Natasha rolls her eyes.

“That excuse doesn’t work if you use it all the time.”

“She’ll be fine,” Tony waves his hand nonchalantly, and Rose stares at the new slice longingly.

“Please, Mama?” Rose takes Natasha’s hand and places it next to the plate. “Sorry I finish first one, I share now. You first, Mama.”

“Yeah, c’mon Mama. Let her have cake,” Tony goads further, earning a pointed look from Natasha. “This aside, I’m just swinging by to ask when she’s opening gifts.”

“You have somewhere else to be?”

“Nah, I just want to see the look on your face when she opens mine.”

“Stark.”

“I promise it’s kid friendly, I made it myself,” Tony crosses his heart. “It’s great, she’ll love it. You, though…I never know with you.”

Natasha looks back at the pile of presents and immediately narrows her eyes at the largest one right next to the coffee table, almost rivaling its size.

“I’m not letting her on it.”

“Mama, can I still have?” Rose interjects, oblivious to the conversation happening and Natasha breaks her gaze to look down at her daughter, fork in hand and second plate of cake untouched.

“Go ahead,” Natasha tells her, and Rose wastes no time in attacking the slice.

“Look, it’s like a sequel to Jaws,” Tony chuckles at how ravenously Rose devours the cake. “And come on, Red. She hangs out in my workshop all the time. It feels right.”

“No.”

“Why not?” Tony shoots back petulantly.

"You know what she got when I took her out today? Hotwheels. She said they looked like your cars," Natasha shakes her head, reaching out to grab a tissue. "I don't mind her playing with them but what you have over there is a completely different thing. She's only four."

Rose, after polishing off another bite from her second slice, manages to catch the mention of her new toy and shoots a chocolate-covered grin to Tony.

"Tony, even the red shiny one, I have it now too!" Rose beams, and Tony reaches over for a high five, the little girl reciprocating it quickly.

"You do? Oh man, if you already have it then my gift's pretty much useless now," Tony fake pouts, and Rose frowns at his words.

"No! I can play with both, promise." Rose stares up at him, and Natasha uses this time to wipe the chocolate from her cheeks and mouth.

"You're a good kid, you know that?" Tony smiles, trying to mellow Natasha down after purposefully riling her up. "Nothing to worry about. She'll love it."

"That's what I'm afraid of," Natasha sighs. "You got any idea what everyone else got her?"

"Not a clue, been too busy making her the best one," Tony wags his eyebrows, and Rose doesn't mind his words, tapping the back of Natasha's hand.

"I leave cake for you, Mama, look," Rose points out, and Natasha lets out a laugh at the bite sized portion of cake she's left over.

"That's very nice of you, Rosie," Natasha scrapes the bit of it into her mouth before looking back at Tony. "Gather everyone for gifts in five?"

Tony turns on his heel, giving her a thumbs up as he walks away to do as he's told. Natasha thoroughly wipes her daughter's face and brings her to the living room, setting her on the floor to let her choose which gift to open first.

"Remember what I told you, Ro," Tony leans forward against the armchair to tap the largest box. "Pretty exciting."

Rose nods then proceeds to carefully peel the tape off from the wrapping paper.

"You rip it open, Rosie. That's the fun bit," Natasha says, and Rose looks at her dubiously before doing so. When Natasha doesn't stop her, she carries on until it reveals a sleek electric ride on car that looked like a miniature version of Tony's Acura.

Rose gasps at the sight, her eyes widening.

"Tony! Red car like yours!" Rose says reverently, bouncing over to him to give him a hug which he returns after a second of hesitation. "Thank you."

"I'm glad you like it," Tony smiles, shooting Natasha a quick glance and was surprised to see a wistful, almost disappointed look on her face. "No using this without any of us around, got it?"

Rose nods obediently before returning to Natasha's side. She opens gift after gift, giving each one equal appreciation and thanking the person who has given it, and even though Rose is clearly excited, Natasha can see her growing more agitated by the minute, her eyes glossing over with unshed tears as she poises herself to dive into her last few presents.

"Hey, hey, what's wrong?" Natasha asks, pulling her away from grabbing the next one. Rose melts into her embrace, surprised to feel tears drip against her neck. "What happened?"

"Jus' so many," Rose sniffles, and Natasha holds back a chuckle despite the smiles that appear on everyone else's faces at her words. "Dunno. Sorry, Mama."

"Nothing to be sorry for," Natasha murmurs, kissing her temple. "Take your time. We'll be here."

"Is she okay?" Steve asks, moving close to place a hand on her back. Rose feels the familiar touch and slowly transfers herself into his hold, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"It's a lot for her to take in," Natasha reports, watching Steve whisper something incomprehensible into Rose's shoulder, making her let out a watery giggle. "But she's good. Never better. Thanks for making this special for her."

The group mumbles their support and 'no problem's back to her, and she relaxes when Rose settles on Steve's lap, continuing to open the remainder of her gifts in his hold.

As the party come to a natural stopping point, people slowly start to disperse back to their homes or respective floors, with Steve and Wanda staying back to help clean and pack up things on Natasha's floor.

Rose walks around aimlessly after fiddling with her new toys, seeing that they were starting to put the decorations away.

"Can we keep b'loons?" Rose asks, rubbing her eyes with a fist. Natasha nods, quickly telling Steve to leave them up before he could untie and deflate them. The new four year old brings her thumb up to her mouth, walking closer to Natasha and grasping the hem of her shirt.

She crouches down to her level, and Rose pulls her thumb out to whisper in her ear. "M'tired, Mama. Can we mil' please?"

Natasha stares back at her for a moment--the bottle's only come out a handful of times, mostly during the first few weeks of her adjusting to living with them and occasionally when she needs the extra comfort to calm her down. She nods once, bringing her hand up to cup her cheek. "Do you need your blanket too?"

Rose slips her thumb back in her mouth, giving her a single nod.

"Okay, okay," Natasha murmurs, glancing back up at Steve and Wanda who were transferring leftover food into plastic containers in the kitchen. "You go get your blanket from your room and I'll prepare your bottle."

Rose obediently scuttles away and Natasha makes her way to the kitchen, maneuvering around the two extra people as she pulls out Rose's bottle from the cupboard.

"Steve, could you grab me the milk from the fridge," Natasha asks, turning around and Wanda helpfully grabs the bottle from her grasp as she screws the cap open, handing it to Steve for him to fill.

A blanket-wrapped Rose rams against her thigh at that moment, and Natasha doesn't hesitate to pick her up, making sure that the blanket is still securely wrapped around her.

Rose whines a bit in her hold as she warms her bottle up in the microwave, and Natasha brings her hand up to press against her back. “Shh, almost done.”

"I don’t want to offend, just genuinely curious. Isn’t she too…” Steve trails off, and Natasha schools the genuine look on his face before shaking her head.

“I give it when she asks for it,” Natasha explains simply, taking the bottle out and giving it a light shake. “You both alright here? We’ll be on the couch if you need me. And take some food to your floor, it’s too much to keep here.”

Natasha turns on her heel without waiting for a response, resting her back against the couch and shifting Rose sideways on her lap, her head resting against her shoulder and knees drawn close to her chest, fully cocooned in her security blanket. "There you go. It was a really full day for you, hmm?”

Rose slowly takes over holding the bottle, humming as she suckles lazily. Natasha wraps her arms around her small form, pressing her cheek against the top of her head.

"I’m sorry I couldn’t find you a gift, I had to let you choose,” Natasha murmurs, her voice low but loud enough for Rose to hear. “I’m…I didn’t know what to get you, and I couldn’t settle on anything because I’m not sure how you’d like it. But I hope you enjoyed the party.”

She feels a soft nod against her shoulder, and Natasha revels in the stillness of this moment, Rose leaning against her with all the trust in the world.

"I’m glad,” Natasha exhales. “That’s what I wished for, baby. I wished for you to be happy.”

Rose has her eyes closed, but she pulls her free hand out from her blanket and pats around until she finds Natasha’s hand, grasping two of her fingers.

"I promise to give you whatever you need, whatever you want. Not just on your birthday. Just ask. Mama’s gonna try her best.”

It doesn’t take long for Rose to drift off to sleep, exhausted from the day’s activities. Natasha pulls the near empty bottle from her lips and sets it down before tightening her hold around her daughter, earning a soft coo in response.

She begins to hum to lull her into a deeper sleep, her voice carrying over to the two people in the kitchen, unaware that Steve’s also managed to catch Natasha’s one sided conversation with her daughter.

"I wish I had that,” Wanda says, catching Steve’s gaze. “It’s clear how much she loves her. She’s not shy about it.”

"Nat’s always got a big heart, she’s just careful who she opens it to,” Steve stacks a container on top of another. “Or were you talking about Rosie?"

"Maybe both," Wanda chuckles. "It's nice to see. They are both so content."

They watch as Natasha slowly carries Rose towards her room, walking with a slight sway to her step. When she emerges after a few moments, she goes back to the living room to retrieve the bottle and walks towards them in the kitchen.

"You both aren’t very subtle,” Natasha comments, cleaning the bottle before turning it over to dry. Wanda only shakes her head, a small smile forming on her face.

"I like watching the two of you,” Wanda admits. “Your energy with her, I can feel it. It is very fierce.”

"Wanda,” Natasha warns, and Wanda only shakes her head, her hands up in surrender.

"No powers, promise. Just something I cannot help,” Wanda defends. “I can also feel Rosie’s. It’s bright, but very contained. But when she’s with you, it’s stronger. Radiant.”

"That’s...that's good, right?" Natasha asks, not being able to help herself. Wanda nods, looking proud.

"It’s direct. You make her happy,” Wanda tells her, and she’s surprised to see Natasha’s eyes glaze over. "The first time you caught me playing with her, I felt it. Her energy just filled the room at the sight of you."

"Christ,” Natasha mutters under her breath, choking out a laugh as she swipes at her cheek. “I think I needed to hear that.”

“I think my Ma’s great, but after seeing you, Nat? I think you’re the best mother in the world," Steve offers honestly, and Natasha smacks his stomach with the back of her hand. “Really.”

"Alright, alright. It’s her birthday, not mine,” Natasha breathes out, running her hand through her hair. “Thanks again for coming by today.”

They eventually exchange goodbyes, each with a few containers of food to bring back to their respective floors, and after a few moments, she’s alone with her daughter again on their floor.

She takes a good looks around, seeing children’s books lined right next to hers, the scattered pile of toys in the living room, the bottle by the drying rack--tangible signs of a child growing and thriving within her living space, and she never thought, in her entire existence, that this was a possibility for her.  


That this was the view that would bring her the most joy. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Natasha get together. A day at the beach, clashing parenting styles, and evening revelations.

“Steve, could you grab Rosie’s b—oh, thanks.”

Natasha cuts herself off when Steve places the packed tote on top of her suitcase. Pepper had planned for a ‘team building’ activity which was essentially an extended weekend on one of Tony’s private islands, and despite the initial complaints from the group, Natasha finds herself looking forward to it since it would also serve as a beach vacation for her daughter as well.

“Got mine out too,” Steve says, patting the duffel next to it. “Did we miss anything?”

“Me!” Rosie pops out from her room, making a beeline towards Steve and he manages to catch her in midair. “Don’t f’rget me, Steve!”

“Of course! Couldn’t forget you,” Steve laughs, giving her a small squeeze before setting her down. “Pepper said to meet at the lobby before we load in.”

Steve had managed to hold on to his promise of trying to help out as much as he can with Rose, and he’s become a constant presence on Natasha’s floor, popping in a few times a week whenever he’s not called for missions just to check in, and he’s the first in line to watch Rose whenever Natasha gets called for emergency ops.

Over the past few months, Rose has warmed up to him enough to be comfortable around him, but doesn’t seek him out as often as she does with her mother.

“Okay,” Natasha replies offhandedly, checking her mental list for anything she might’ve forgotten. “You excited, Rosie?”

“Yea,” Rose nods, her little pigtails flailing. “Are we going now?”

“Mmhmm,” Natasha takes her hand and grabs the suitcase with her other, wheeling it behind her with Steve not far behind them. Along the way, Rose dallies between the two adults, eventually ending up to meet everyone with with the four year old in Steve’s hold, causing Tony to shoot them a teasing smirk.

“There’s the happy family,” Tony remarks, earning an elbow from Pepper.

With Steve being more hands on with Rose, he and Natasha had naturally grown closer as the months pass, and he manages to muster up the courage to ask her out on a date, genuinely surprised (and partially relieved) when she concedes. They haven’t gone pass the occasional dinner out and sleeping over after winding down with a movie, but neither are in any rush to put a label on what they have.

They load into the private jet, and Natasha sits Rose next to her by the window while Steve and Bucky stay across them. She buckles her seatbelt and places her blanket over her lap, smoothing her hair down right after.

“It might be a bit bumpy going up,” Natasha lets her know, and Rose nods, looking out the window with her sandaled feet swinging back and forth. When the plane begins to go down the runway, Rose gets tossed back into her seat at the sudden movement, grabbing Natasha's forearm and squeezing it using nearly full strength, making her wince.

"Almost up in the air, Rosie," Natasha grits through her teeth, and Steve immediately reaches forward to pat Rose’s knee.

"Ease up, Ro," Steve says, and she immediately lets go of Natasha’s arm, frowning when she sees light purple imprints starting to bloom on her skin. "Just a bit longer.”

Rose uneasily squirms in her seat, whining loudly when the pressure punches against her ears and her stomach drops as the plane lifts from the ground. 

"It's okay, Rosie, shh," Natasha soothes, her hand on the back of her head. When the seatbelt sign finally turns off, she immediately brings the armrest up and unbuckles Rose from her seat, transferring her sideways on her lap.

"Sorry, Mama," Rose whimpers, tracing her finger over the bruises on her arm.

"No harm done," Natasha reassures her, rubbing her back. "You were so brave, I'm proud of you."

Natasha wraps her blanket around her small form before hugging her tightly against her chest, resting her cheek against the top of her head.

"You want to take a nap? I'll wake you up for a snack in a while," Natasha mumbles into her hair, and Rose nods, bringing her thumb up to her lips.

Rose drifts off half an hour into the flight, and Natasha asks Steve to recline the seat next to her before settling her down.

"Has she ever done that before?” Bucky frowns, glancing at her arm and Natasha nods once.

"A few times, but that’s out of her control,” She looks over at Rose to make sure she looked comfortable enough in her sleep. “This wasn’t the worst.”

"Oh yeah, Rose wouldn’t go near you for days after that one,” Steve recalls the memory, the fear evident in her eyes when she accidentally threw a fork mid-tantrum. Natasha was able to dodge the projectile utensil but wasn’t quick enough, scraping her thigh and effectively drawing blood, much to the little girl’s horror. Steve had been called down to help calm Rosie as Natasha cleans herself up, and even afterwards, she had refused to even so much look at her mother, too afraid of hurting her again. “It was rough on the both of you.”

"Oh, don’t remind me,” Natasha lets out a chuckle despite recalling Rose crying herself to sleep for how many nights and refusing all forms of contact. “She’s getting better at controlling herself, though. She was scared but she let me go immediately—on any other day, she would’ve probably even dug her nails in.”

Despite Natasha’s promise, she wakes Rose up an hour before they land and she’s much calmer then she was when they left, much to her relief. They arrive at the island just before dinner, and Pepper hands out keys to their assigned rooms, giving Natasha the largest one since she’s sharing with Rose. She settles the both of them in, allowing her daughter to roam around the space to acquaint herself before deciding on getting a head start with cooking dinner for the team. 

As she adds thickener to the sauce, she feels two hands wrap around from behind her and a chin resting on her shoulder, and she turns her head slightly to press her nose against his cheek.

“Hey there,” Natasha murmurs, and Steve only smiles, slightly tightening his hold. “Are you here to help with dinner or are you freeloading as usual?”

“You’re such a mood killer, Nat,” Steve groans playfully, burrowing his nose against her shoulder when she laughs. “I actually swung by to see if you were free. Everyone else is out watching the sunset, and I was hoping you’d come and watch it with me.” 

“Is that so?”

“Mmhmm, had a blanket laid out and everything, but I guess I can chop carrots instead,” Steve shrugs, earning a chuckle and a smack against his chest. “You’re so mean to me.”

“It’s how I show affection,” Natasha grins, but reaches up to brush her lips against his cheek for good measure. “Finely diced, if you can.”

“On it,” Steve does as he’s told, and when the team starts filing in, Bruce and Sam offer to help out as well, relieving Steve from chopping duty. Natasha tells him to call Rose for dinner, and he wanders around the large house, eventually finding her in her and Natasha’s shared room playing with her dolls on the bed. “Hey, Ro. Dinner time.”

“Okay,” Rose mumbles, dropping her dolls and grabbing her throw blanket, starting to make her way through the door until Steve stops her.

“Maybe leave your blanket here first, Rosie?” Steve asks, and Rose looks up at him confused. “We just don’t want it to get dirty.”

“Oh,” Rose says, thumbing the edge of her blanket before reluctantly placing it back on the bed. She takes Steve’s hand and they walk hand in hand towards the dining area, and both were met with the smell of lasagna wafting through the air.

Dinner was relatively quiet, apart from a few jokes and anecdotes shared around the table. Sam had proposed to watch a movie in the living room to cap off the night, and Natasha lets Rose wait for her in their room before letting him know she’ll join as soon as she can.

“Rose has a bedtime, and I’m staying with her until she falls asleep,” Natasha says when Steve asks about it. “Why?”

“Nat, don’t you think you might be coddling her too much?” Steve gulps when Natasha snaps her head to look at him in disbelief. “She needs to be more independent and she can’t do that if you keep babying her.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Natasha starts, her tone not at all apologetic. “So when she asks me to stay with her, you expect me to say no? To not let her sleep with her blanket that she brings around? I might as well stop preparing her food while we’re at it!”

“Nat, that’s not what I meant,” Steve tries to backpedal, but Natasha jabs her finger against his chest.

“Then what do you mean? Enlighten me please,” Natasha bites out, not wanting the rest of the team to be listening in. “That child had absolutely nothing when I found her. If she finds security in a bottle or me holding her through the night, I’m not going to take that away."

"Nat..." Steve trails off, knowing he's struck a chord. "I'm sorry. I just...I'm pulling things from my own childhood and call me selfish, but I don’t get to see you by yourself anymore."

"I don't have much to pull from so I'm taking her lead," Natasha sighs, running her hand through her hair. "I let her decide when she's ready to grow out of things. And of course I can’t be by myself anymore, she’s still dependent on me. I can’t just leave at a drop of a hat."

“Mama,” Natasha hears a muffled voice before Rose pokes her head out of the door. “Mama?”

“I’ll be right there,” Natasha calls back, waiting for her to close the door before returning her gaze on Steve. “She's grown fond of you and I hope you listen to what she needs instead of deciding for her. That's all I'm asking for, Steve. Don't rush her.”

“I’m sorry, Nat,” Steve frowns, and Natasha only shakes her head.

“No worries,” She throws back nonchalantly, making her way into the room. Steve doesn’t expect her to come out for movie night after their talk, and his suspicions are confirmed when the end credits roll and there was still no Natasha in sight.

The team had planned on spending the next day at the beach, and when Natasha emerges with a tote bag slung over each shoulder, Steve uses this as an excuse to approach.

“Steve! We’re gonna go in the ocean today,” Rose rushes towards him, wrapping her arms around his thigh before he swings her up into his arms. “Are you gonna go too?”

“Of course I am,” Steve grins, tickling her neck. “Is your mama gonna teach you how to swim?”

Rose shakes her head. “She said ocean’s really big, but I can play near the water.”

“The shore’s fun too, you can collect some really pretty shells,” Steve tells her, glancing at Natasha at the corner of his eye . _I’m heeding your advice, Nat. I’m still sorry for last night._ “You can find hermit crabs if you’re lucky.”

“And if you stay still when I’m putting on your sunscreen, maybe I’ll let Steve teach you how to swim,” Natasha cuts in, giving him a meaningful look.  _I’m still overprotective, but I’ll try to loosen up._ “Just don’t go out of his sight.”

They make their way to the beach, wordlessly resolving their quarrel from the night before. Natasha takes her sandals off and squats down to remove Rose’s as well, letting Steve go ahead to set up their towels on the sand.

“I’s mushy,” Rose smiles as she squishes the sand in between her toes before eventually stomping her feet towards their blankets with more enthusiasm. She removes their cover ups, revealing her in her plain black bikini and Rose in a pink one-piece suit with a low cut back and ruffles around the waist.

“Rosie, you’re so cute!” Wanda compliments, reaching out to touch the ruffles on her swimsuit. She gives her a shy thank you while Natasha slathers sunscreen over her exposed limbs. When she turns her around to get her back, Wanda can’t help but let out a sad gasp at the scars that marred her skin.

Rose is too young to feel self-conscious about it, but Natasha makes quick work of spreading the sunscreen on her back before sitting her down and covering herself with the lotion as well.

“Are they all gone?” Wanda asks Natasha as she works her hands over her calves. There’s a certain fire in her voice, and she won’t be surprised if she turns her head and sees her eyes glowing red.

“Every last one.” Natasha confirms.

“Good.”

“Mama, can we go in the ocean now?” Rose asks, turning her head to look between the both of them.

“Of course,” Natasha smiles, taking her hand standing up from their spot on the blanket. “You coming with, Wanda?”

“I will be, as you say, working on my tan,” Wanda laughs, and Natasha chuckles before padding through sand with her daughter until they reach the shore, allowing the water to crash against their ankles. Rose looks up and sees Steve with the water coming up to his knees.

“Come here, Rosie,” Steve calls out, and when she feels Natasha’s hand gently pushing her forward, she wades farther, growing nervous when the water reaches her waist but relaxes when Steve crouches down and grabs her hands. “Look at you!”

“Mama, I’m swimming!” Rose squeals excitedly, grabbing Steve’s forearms as she swishes her in a circle. Bucky joins in after a few moments, splashing a bit of water in her face and making her shriek in surprise.

“Swim to me, Rosie, I’m more fun than Stevie over there,” Bucky goads, earning a ‘hey!’ from his friend and actually frowns when Rose relinquishes her hold on him, bouncing towards Bucky instead. The minute she reaches her arms out for him, he takes her by the waist and throws her up in the air, letting her crash down into the water but still firmly in his hold and the little girl laughs with delight all throughout the surprise attack.

“Bucky, careful!” Natasha calls out, but lacks the usual edge of panic to her voice at the sight of her daughter being so carefree.

“We’ve got her, Nat,” Steve reassures her, looking at her earnestly until he feels himself getting soaked from his right. They turn their heads and sees Bucky keeping Rose afloat on her back, encouraging her to keep kicking her feet to splash Steve. “Go relax.If you’ll excuse me, I need to get back at these two.”

Natasha chuckles but nods, watching them play for a little while longer before retreating back to her towel next to Wanda, lying down on her back and facing her head towards her.

“Break time for Mama?” Wanda muses, and Natasha gives her a small smile. 

They talk about mundane things, allowing herself to lower her guard down with Rosie for a little while, trusting them enough to keep a watch on her. She keeps an ear out for her voice, though, and when she hasn’t heard her distant giggles in a while, she looks out to check, her stomach dropping when she sees the boys neck deep into the ocean and no Rose in between them.

“I’m not very familiar with th—,”

“Hold on, I can’t see...” Natasha interrupts, her heartbeat picking up by the second. She’s on her feet in a flash, calling out to them. “Steve, where’s Rosie?”

“She wanted to show us how long she can hold her breath underwater,” Steve answers back nonchalantly as he was laughing at something Bucky has said. He brings his arms together, expecting to feel ruffles on a tiny waist but blanches when his hands meet.

‘How long?” Natasha asks, starting to remove her sandals and quickly making her way past the shoreline. “How long has she been under?”

‘Almost two minutes,” Bucky supplies, and flinches at the murderous look on her face.

“Idiots!” Natasha bites out before diving her head under. Her eyes sting initially at the saltwater but she pushes further in search of a small figure. She comes up for air once, and she was about plunge down again when Bucky resurfaces a few moments after, an unconscious Rose in his grasp.

‘She must’ve went deeper, got her foot caught on something so she couldn’t resurface,” Bucky recounts but Natasha doesn’t listen, laser focused on getting Rose to shore and water out of her lungs.

“Pull her out _now_!” Natasha barks out, and Steve moves to follow after, attempting to circle her wrist but she quickly yanks it away. “Don’t touch me.”

“Nat,” Steve tries, but Natasha was already rushing to join Bucky nearing the shore. He lays Rose next to Wanda on the beach towel and she immediately sits up, two fingers sliding over her neck to check for a pulse. Natasha frantically kneels down next to her daughter, slightly tilting her head up and crouching down near her ear.

“Rosie, can you hear me? It’s Mama, can you move for me?” Natasha tries to keep her voice level, but not seeing the steady rise and fall of her chest shakes her to the core. She gently opens her mouth and puffs a few breaths into her system, her fingers pressing almost harshly against her neck, desperate for a sign of life.

Natasha curses under her breath when she feels a barely imperceptible thump against her fingers, and she maneuvers herself in a position to start chest compressions.

“Come on, come on,” Natasha heaves, counting in her head before alternating with rescue breaths. The team watches on, making sure not to crowd her, and Steve fights the urge to come close.

“Rosie, please!” A guttural plea rips from her throat, unrelenting with her motions. Her heart beats twice as fast with every compression she does, as if trying to compensate for the slow pace of her daughter’s pulse. “Come on, stay with me!”

“Nat,” Bucky tries to pull her back after a few more minutes, but Natasha shrugs him off, determined to keep time with her attempts at revival. Wanda feels for a pulse again, and was relieved to feel a stronger one against her fingertips.

“She’s coming around,” Wanda murmurs, and at that moment, water sputters out of the little girl’s mouth, and Natasha can’t help but choke out a gasp of relief. She continues to cough water out of her system, and Wanda gently assists her to sit up, resting a hand against her back.

“Rosie,” Natasha manages to get out, her voice shaking as she presses her lips against her daughter’s temple. “You’re okay. You’re safe, baby. You’re okay.”

Rose’s eyes slowly flutter open, her sight slightly hazy but she hears her mother’s voice murmuring soft words in her ear and she instinctively leans towards it, her hands blindly searching.

Rose tries to croak out her name out mid-cough, and her heart clenches, thinking that a few minutes ago, there was a possibility that she wouldn’t be able to hear her voice again. She carefully transfers her on her lap, wrapping a clean towel around her shoulders and rocking her gently.

“Shh, Mama’s got you,” Natasha reassures, swallowing thickly to steel her voice. “Focus on breathing for me. That’s it.”

When Rose gets the last bit of water out of her system, she eventually slumps her side against Natasha’s form, shivering slightly.

“Don’t wanna swim ‘nymore,” Rose murmurs, trying to curl into herself as much as possible but Natasha keeps a hand on her chest, not wanting her to tighten any airways that she’s only recently been able to clear up. “M’tired.”

“We’ll rest back in the room,” Natasha murmurs into her salt-damp hair. “Wanda, can you help me bring her things?”

Wanda only nods, quickly moving to pack her belongings into her tote as Natasha stands up, holding Rose as close to her as possible and allowing herself to savor the warmth of her little body and the shallow breaths against her collarbone.

“Nat, I’m—,” Steve moves forward to apologize, but she shoots daggers with her glare, rendering him frozen in his spot.

“Not now,” She cuts him off, and he nods defeatedly, stepping back. The girls make their way back inside the beach house, and when Natasha tries to set her down to change her out of her swimsuit, she lifts her feet up to keep from touching the floor.

“No,” Rose drawls out, her hands firmly gripping her forearms.

“Baby, I need to change you out of your bathing suit,” Natasha explains. “We can get you showered later.”

Rose shakes her head frantically, her bottom lip slightly jutting out and beginning to tremble. Wanda takes initiative, pulling several drawers out in search for her clothes, and Rose concedes with changing into a light dress with Natasha keeping her on her lap.

“I need to dress up, Rosie, can you go to Wanda for a bit?” Natasha asks gently, and Rose reluctantly nods before Wanda picks her up, letting her rest her head against her shoulder.

“You’re okay, malyshka,” Wanda sways Rose in her arms to appease her while Natasha steps into the bathroom to change into a pair of sweats and a tank top. She takes a few grounding breaths while she’s in there, trying to ignore how her fingers were still trembling even after everything that had transpired.

When she’s managed to gather her bearings enough to appear composed, she goes out of the bathroom and takes Rose from Wanda’s grasp, thanking her in the same breath for helping out.

Wanda leaves the room to give them some privacy, her last view before closing the door was of Natasha gently rocking Rose in her hold, one of her hands resting against the back of her head.

Rose eventually drifts off to sleep, and Natasha keeps a vigilant watch at the rise and fall of her small form, hovering her hand over her nose every once in a while to feel puffs of warm breath against her skin.

Steve, on the other hand, feels responsible for what had happened and stops by their room to attempt to apologize again a few hours later. When he opens the door, he finds Rose starting to rouse from her nap, with Natasha resting against the headboard pretending to read a book.

“Nat, you don’t know how sorry I am,” Steve starts, and Natasha flicks her eyes up at him for a brief moment before looking back down at the book.

“I think I’ve got a clue.”

“Don’t be mad, Mama, was jus’ an accident,” Rose yawns, trying to placate her. She sits up rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. “He didn’t mean to.”

“I’m not mad,” Natasha downplays. She was downright furious. “I’m just upset. He was supposed to keep an eye on you.” 

“I wanted to go deep and I swim 'way from Steve," Rose admits, frowning. "Was gonna swim up to s'prise him and Bucky but I got stuck under."

“Rosie," Natasha stares down at her for a moment. "The ocean is dangerous, I told you that so many times, just in case you didn't already see how big it is. Why would you do that?"

“I don't know," Rose mumbles, and her heart fills with guilt when Natasha puts her hands on her shoulders to face her directly, shocked when she sees her eyes brimming with tears.

“Baby, why would you do that?” Natasha whispers, her tone borderline hysterical and her hands reach up to cup her face. “The one time I look away. I can’t…I can’t lose you. Mama can’t lose you, too.”

Rose’s face scrunches up in anguish, breaking out into sobs as she fists her dress in her hands.

“I don’t know! Mama, I’m sorry!” Rose wails, leaning forward to close the distance between them. “M’sorry, Mama. I won’t do it again!”

Natasha doesn’t speak, only envelopes her arms around her daughter as she finally lets her tears fall freely down her face. They cry holding each other for what seems to be an eternity, but Steve drops to his knees by her side of the bed, ready to offer whatever he can.

When they eventually calm down, Natasha, not lifting her head up from her daughter’s shoulder, reaches an arm out for Steve and he eagerly takes it, feeling her squeeze his palm. The room feels lighter at her touch, and he knows that they’ll be okay.

Later that evening, Natasha gets Rose settled down and had requested for Steve to tuck her in as well. She sets her in the middle of the bed and places her security blanket over her before laying down propped up on her side. Steve sits down first on the opposite side of the bed before eventually mirroring her position, Rose nestled in between them.

Steve watches Natasha for a few moments, marveling at how visibly she wears her heart as she hums a soft tune to lull Rose to sleep, how her body relaxes when she leans down to kiss her goodnight.

“I was in Russia, serving in the war when I fell in love with a soldier I was fighting alongside with,” Natasha whispers out of the blue, the flow of voice sounding like the lost words to her lullaby. "His name was Nikolai. We declared ourselves married, and he tied a black ribbon around my ring finger."

Steve doesn't dare to interrupt.

“I became pregnant soon after. He died months before I could deliver, and the midwife couldn't meet my eyes when she saw her."

Sadness flashed in his eyes, trying to piece everything together in his mind.

“She was the most beautiful baby I've ever seen. Her hair was dark brown, and I imagine her eyes to be blue,” Natasha continues wistfully, not stopping her ministrations as she ghosts her finger over Rose’s features. “I never heard her cry and I didn’t get to hold her for long. She was dead when I delivered.”

“I can’t imagine...” Steve trails off, and when Natasha meets his gaze, she gives him a sad smile.

“Her name is Rose."

“Nat," Steve feels like his breath had been punched out of his stomach at her revelation. "When you said…”

Natasha only nods.

“That's why I'm so careful, why I don't let her out of my sight," She exhales. "Because I don't know what I'd do if I lost her too."

Steve reaches out for her hand and he’s relieved when she doesn’t pull away, and he squeezes it with a certain tenderness she’s never seen from him.

“I know sorry doesn’t cut it,” Steve shakes his head. “I never understood why you protect her so fiercely—I know it’s out of love, but now I know that you’re just trying to give her everything you weren’t able to in the first place.”

“I’m not…I haven’t replaced her,” Natasha lets him know before he gets the wrong idea. “I’ll always carry little Rose with me and that loss…it’s just easier to bear with Rosie in my life.”

Steve understands to a point, not about having children but outliving every person that he’s loved, and he slowly picks Natasha’s hand up and brushes his lips against her knuckles.

“I made a promise, I told you I’ll help however I can,” Steve murmurs into her skin. “I’m sorry, Nat, for letting the both of you down.”

“Don't do it again,” Natasha whispers, closing her eyes.

“Never,” Steve affirms. It’s a hard promise to keep, but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t try his hardest. “Whatever you need, both of you. I’ll do my best.”

Natasha takes her hand away before placing it over Rose’s sleeping form, and she finally lays down, curling her body next to her daughter.

“Stay with us tonight?”

Steve didn’t have to be asked twice.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha had no idea that three little words from the compound's resident AI would make her blood run cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, just wanted to say a huge thank you to all of you who have showed your appreciation for this verse! I love writing for soft Mama Nat and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy coming up with these little slices of life.
> 
> Comments and feedback is very much appreciated, and do let me know if there’s anything you’d like to see down the line!

Natasha had no idea that three little words from the compound's resident AI would make her blood run cold.

It was three fifteen in the morning, and Natasha shoots up when she hears a soft beep and FRIDAY’s voice filling the room.

“Systems back online.”

She grabs the gun from her nightstand and bolts out of her room, stalking towards her daughter’s at a wild pace.

“How long, FRIDAY?”

“Approximately an hour and eight minutes.”

Natasha curses under her breath, and when she shimmies the door open, she pales at the strewn sheets on the bed and her daughter’s security blanket rumpled on the floor near the window.

That, and the fact that Rose was nowhere in sight.

“FRIDAY, call for emergency meeting,” Natasha bites out harshly, trying her best compartmentalize her emotions, gearing her focus into finding her child the fastest way possible.

When the rest of the team stumble into her floor a few minutes later, Natasha feels livid that none of them seemed to have woken up at FRIDAY’s warning of a security breach.

“What’s the matter? This is the most secure building in the—,” Tony yawns, but gets cut off at the sight of Natasha tightly clutching her daughter’s blanket. “No.”

“Yes, and she slipped right through all of us,”  _Right through me,_ Natasha chides herself. “I’ve combed through the footage. Even FRIDAY’s backup surveillance was down for that hour.”

“Shit. Shit, Red, I’m—,”

“You can apologize by helping to look for her,” Natasha says stoically. “I’m figuring it’s HYDRA trying to take back what’s theirs. Start by running a search on any potential hidden bases they still have in operation.”

“And if she’s not there?” Bruce asks, his eyes remorseful.

“Then we keep looking.”

It takes them several days to locate a singular base but after a quick sweep of the area, they realize that it’s not the one where her daughter is held captive in, spurning Natasha’s anger and grief even further.

“Nat, when was the last time you slept?” Steve frowns at his teammate when they hit the one week mark. He’s not one to talk, though, but figured that taking out his frustration and stress over Rose’s abduction on a heavy bag was better than depriving himself of rest. “Rosie wouldn’t—,” 

“Don’t do that,” Natasha snaps her head from the monitor and looks at him with bloodshot eyes. “I need to find her. I’m not going to rest until she’s back here.”

“You can’t keep looking if you’re burned out,” Steve pushes, grabbing her wrist but she’s too tired to yank it away. “Just two hours. Then we’ll go back to the search.”

Natasha looks down at the blanket she’s laid over her lap and had taken to holding whenever she’s running a search, and lets out a deep sigh.

“An hour.”

As another week passes, Natasha feels her resolve starting to waver. They’re all huddled together in her living area as they pull another all nighter to confirm a potential location, and when she offers to bring the team coffee to the living room, she spots Rose’s bottle next to her personal mug and she erupts into tears right then and there.

“Oh, Nat,” Clint catches her gripping the counter as she lets out silent sobs, and he’s next to her in a flash, enveloping her in a hug. “We’ll find her, I promise.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” Natasha mumbles against his chest, and Clint squeezes her tighter. “For all we know, she could be dead.”

“Don’t say that,” Clint pulls her away to look at her straight in the eye. “I believe she’s still out there. We’re not stopping until we find her, alright?”

“I don’t know if I can take another false base,” Natasha whispers out, embarrassed to admit her weakness. “It’s been over two weeks.”

“Would you stop if any of my kids went missing?” Clint suddenly asks, and Natasha shakes her head, suddenly aghast at the thought of herself giving up for her own daughter. They hear murmurs of coordinates being exchanged, and Natasha hastily swipes at her eyes before joining the conversation.

“We’ve got the details. Fourth time’s a charm.” 

The team flies out for over three hours before landing a few hundred meters away from the HYDRA base. They spread out and easily eliminate outside security without sounding any internal alarms, and Natasha is the first to slip into the facility, taking down any person that gets in her way.

She turns the corner and finds Wanda blasting a man several feet away as she guards a door, and when she peers through the glass panel, she barely contains her gasp at the sight of her daughter.

“Rosie,” Natasha whispers, her eyes immediately scanning her unconscious body. They had shaved her head again, and her wrists are bound and chained to the wall, perhaps to keep her from fighting back or being taken again.

“Stand back,” Wanda says quickly before grabbing the lock with a red-misted hand and yanking it off, throwing the now scrap piece of metal violently against another crony approaching them. “I’ll keep guard. Get her.”

Natasha enters the cell and was immediately welcomed with the pungent smell of urine. She breathes through her mouth as she approaches her curled up form, looking even smaller than she remembers, and gently touches her shoulder to rouse her.

Rose opens her eyes blearily, lifting her head slightly but lolls back down, seemingly too heavy for her to hold up on her own. Wanda steps in after a few moments, silently asking permission to pull her restraints away and Natasha nods almost immediately.

When Natasha brings Rose up in her arms, she curses at how alarmingly light she feels, and how her ribs poke out against the flimsy gown she had on.

“We’re taking you back home, alright?” Natasha says, hauntingly reminiscent of the first time they met, and Rose doesn’t seem to comprehend, her head resting heavy against her shoulder.

Natasha, having an idea of what HYDRA was capable of, had anticipated her daughter not recognizing her but didn’t take into account just how dehumanizing their methods of erasure would be.

They step out of the cell and makes a run towards the nearest exit when she feels a hand yanking her elbow back, almost relinquishing her hold on Rose. She quickly spins around and shoots him twice before tightening her arm around her daughter and running back to the quintjet.

“We got her, she’s safe,” Wanda informs the team as they step in. Steve all but rushes towards the pair, but Natasha puts a hand up and he stops in his tracks almost immediately.

“She doesn’t…they drugged her to keep her complacent,” Natasha informs him, her voice loud enough to let the team know as well. “She’s also lost a lot of weight. Can you have Cho on standby?”

“Her team’s prepping as we speak,” Tony offers, still slightly guilt ridden that his technology had indirectly caused all of this. “What else do you need?”

“I don’t know if they wiped her.”

“I can check,” Wanda rushes, eager to be useful, and Natasha gives her a warning look before conceding. “Just check, I promise. Nothing else.”

Natasha sits down on the floor with her daughter limply propped up on her lap with her back against her chest. Wanda’s eyes glow scarlet as she works, her scarlet haze wrapping around the two of them. She frowns after a few moments, her eyebrows furrowing.

“I believe they had tried to remove her time with us but they’re still in her head, if not a little hazy,” Wanda says before her frown deepens. “Her mind is partially focused on the pain. They whipped her repeatedly. They injected her multiple times with this green liquid and she sleeps almost immediately.”

“What else?” Natasha finds herself asking despite her hands threatening to tremble. “What else did she see?”

“She…she dreams of you, Natasha,” Wanda reveals, a pained look on her face. “Also Steve and me, Bucky once, but it’s almost always you. She’s hallucinated you multiple times there, saving her. I do not think she realizes you are real now.”

When they arrive at the compound, they rush a still unconscious Rose to the medbay where Helen was already waiting for them with a prepped room. Natasha immediately notes that she, along with the rest of her staff, were wearing casual wear underneath their scrubs and coats.

“We will take it from here,” Helen says, almost regretting her words when she glances at Natasha’s defiant look.

“I need to be in there,” Natasha protests, and Helen only shoots her an apologetic smile before closing the doors. 

The whole team quickly changes out of their uniforms and into daily wear before starting a vigilant wait outside the emergency room. It takes a few hours before Helen comes out, and Natasha jumps to her feet the second the door swings open. 

“She’s stable. The lacerations on her back and sides were infected but we’ve salved them over and should heal nicely within a week or two. We managed to pump most of the drugs out of her system but she’ll have to be back on those antibiotics for another week,” Helen lists down, giving Natasha a tight lipped smile. “She’s dehydrated and had developed UTI, so I’d recommend you keep her in pull ups for the meantime. I’d need her to stay overnight then FRIDAY will be able to do monitoring after that in your quarters.”

Tony catches Natasha’s slight grimace at her last statement. “I’m developing a new protocol, in case FRIDAY gets hacked into again,” He pipes up, a nervous hand behind his neck. “I’ll get it installed on your floor by tomorrow.”

“Anything else?” Natasha asks, and Helen nods.

“She’s been calling for her mama, and I don’t want to delay that any further.”

“Can we see her?” Steve asks the question on everyone’s minds, and Helen simply turns her head to look at him.

“Just two at a time, we don’t want to overwhelm her,” Helen says before stepping back inside.

“Nat, go ahead. We’ll see her tomorrow on your floor,” Clint urges, and she looks at the encouraging nods her team offers her before stepping inside. She frowns at how small her daughter looks on the large hospital bed, but quickly rushes over when she sees her drifting in and out of consciousness, fighting to stay awake.

“Shh, it’s okay,” She soothes, cupping the crown of her head and running her thumb over her hairline. “You can go back to sleep.” 

“Mama,” Rose gurgles blearily, her eyelids drooping. “Home.” 

“You are home, Rosie,” Natasha whispers, pressing a light kiss on her forehead and feels warmth bloom in her chest when she coos in response. “Rest. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

Rose frowns at her words, her eyes closed. “P’omise?” 

“Yes, baby,” Natasha swears, and Rose hums before finally surrendering to sleep. Helen looks on, smiling sadly at the little girl. 

“She thinks she’s still there,” Helen comments.

“She doesn’t think I’m real.” 

“We’ll see if we can discharge her a bit earlier tomorrow. Bringing her back to her home environment might help ground her to reality,” Helen suggests, and Natasha smooths her thumb over between Rose’s furrowed eyebrows. “Try to initiate contact with her this time instead of the other way around.” 

“Got it,” Natasha looks up at Helen. “Can the others come in while she’s asleep? I think they need the sign of life as much as I do.” 

“I’ll let them in.”

The following day, Helen deems her little patient stable enough to be discharged just after four in the afternoon. After giving Natasha her daughter’s prescriptions, she wheels a semi-delirious Rose to their floor, stopping to leave the wheelchair by the living area and carrying her the rest of the way to her room.

Being careful of her back, Natasha gingerly lays her down on her side, quick to soothe when she fusses a bit before placing the security blanket that she’s kept in her room the entire time she had been gone right next to her. 

Natasha couldn’t bring herself to leave immediately, and she stays with her for a few more minutes, letting the fact that her daughter was safe and back home sink in a bit more before stepping out, keeping the door open. 

She takes a deep breath before walking towards Rose’s room, bringing her hand up to the invisible scanner next to her door, a mechanism Tony had managed to install overnight.

_ “I call it the Ring Around The Rosie protocol,” Tony tells Natasha almost immediately after installing it, bringing her back to her floor while Steve keeps watch over Rose at the medbay. “Get it? ‘Cause she’s Rosie and it’s a nursery rhy—okay, anyway. Here, palm up on the sensor.” _

_ Natasha does as she’s told and she hears a faint click. _

_ “If ever FRIDAY’s down or tampered with, her room, along with your floor, is accessible by any of us in the compound, and only you can add and change the people who have access to it as well,” Tony informs her, letting her open the door to the room she hasn’t set foot in for weeks. “That also goes for the windows surrounding your floor. Bulletproof, Hulk smash-proof, you name it.” _

_ “Good,” Natasha murmurs, running her hand over the strewn covers. When Natasha doesn’t comment, Tony carries on, pulling up a hologram of the room. _

_ “Motion sensors tailored to track her movement and vitals. It’s reinforced in her room, but I took the liberty of adding it around the compound so you know where she is at all times,” Tony shows her an image projection of Rose lying asleep on the hospital bed, as well as what seem to be moving coordinates of her exact location in the bottom corner. “You’ll also be notified whenever something out of normal range happens.” _

_ “Anything else?” _

_ “I’m sorry,” Tony’s shoulders slump down. “I feel that this is my fault and I don’t know how else to show you how sorry I am.” _

_ “It’s not your fault,” Natasha lets him know, looking up to meet his gaze. “I’ve become too reliant on your security. It escaped me that even the smartest tech can still be easily manipulated.” _

_ “How about we agree that it was neither our faults and HYDRA’s a pain in the ass?” Tony offers, and Natasha turns the corner of her mouth up to a smirk. _

_ “Are you…are you planning on moving out?” Tony asks after a few moments, a nervous edge to his voice. “I can improve on this, you know, make the systems impenetrable. Hell, I’ll coat your windows with Vibranium if I could. Just—,” _

_ “What?” _

_ “Don’t take the kid away from us,” Tony finally admits. “Like you said. She’s our family too.” _

Natasha prepares her daughter’s room for later this evening in case she would like to sleep alone. She cleans up a bit and changes her sheets, picking up the stray toys from the floor and lining up the story books on the shelf.

She peeks into her room right after and finds that Rose had flopped onto her stomach, her arms and knees curled into herself as she sleeps.

“Mama,” Rose drawls out with a slight hitch to her voice, her eyes still shut. “Home.”

Natasha felt her heart drop right then and there. She drops to her knees on the side of the bed, reaching out to stroke her cheek with her knuckle. 

“Wan’ go home,” Rose murmurs again, and Natasha leans forward to kiss her temple.

“You’re home, Rosie, you’re in Mama’s room,” Natasha whispers near the shell of her ear, bringing her hand down to lightly stroke what’s exposed of her arm. “Can you feel me?” 

“Don’t go, Mama, bring me,” Rose sobs lightly, twitching slightly when Natasha ghosts a finger over her back, resting her hand on the base of her spine.

“Rosie, I’m going to hold you, okay?” Natasha tells her before carefully gathering her in her arms, cradling her sideways against her body. She tenses and squirms a bit to get comfortable, but eventually relaxes in her hold as soon as she starts making soft shushing noises near her ear.

“I’ve got your blanket too,” Natasha hums, blindly grabbing it next to her and wedging it into Rose’s curled up form. “Here, can you feel it?”

Rose’s eyebrows scrunch together, seemingly frustrated.

“D-don’t leave me,” Rose stutters out, her fingers violently clutching the blanket. “P’ease, Mama.” 

“Baby,” Natasha exhales, bringing her knees up slightly to cocoon her small figure. She leans down again, pressing light kisses over her face to coax her awake. “Shh, Mama’s got you. Open your eyes, c’mon.”

Rose startles awake, her eyes unfocused and her heart racing a mile a minute. She takes a few moments to catch her breath before looking down at the blanket, her blanket, gripped tightly in her hands. She hears her Mama’s voice and she cries harder as she leans fully against it, wishing with all her might that it was real. 

“Shh, Rosie, it’s me. It’s Mama,” Natasha whispers, taking her bruised wrist and kissing her fist before nuzzling it with her nose. “You’re home, baby. It’s all real.” 

“No,” Rose turns her head and buries her face into her breastbone, trembling as she sobs. She’s confused and tired and her body hurts and she doesn’t know if this is really her Mama or just another convincing dream. 

“Don’t go, don’t go,” Rose almost chants, shrilling out her name hysterically. Natasha doesn’t know what else to do or say, but she stays there, unwavering, uncurling her daughter’s tightly clenched fist and leaving it to press her palm just above her left breast. 

“Here, Rosie, feel my heartbeat?” Natasha murmurs close to her face, wiping her tears away with her other thumb. “Mama’s not going anywhere. Can you tell me what you see?”

“Room,” Rose husks out, but shakes her head. “Jus’ a dream.”

“No, baby, not a dream,” Natasha quickly shuts down the thought. In an act of desperation, she slowly pulls her away and the four year old whines loudly at the loss of contact, but she kisses her fingers to let her know that she’s just there.

“Do you trust me?” Natasha patiently waits for a feeble nod before carefully working her dress off, leaving her in her pull up. She removes her own shirt as well, leaving her in her sports bra before leaning against the headboard and bringing her daughter close again, covering her dress over her back and draping her blanket over the both of them. 

Natasha leads Rose’s head to rest her ear over her heart.

“Listen,” Natasha is almost desperate now, tears rolling down her cheeks and pressing her lips over the top of her head. “Please, baby. Can you feel me now?” 

Rose feels the warmth against her skin, her cries petering out into sniffles and hiccups as she focuses on the rhythmic thump thump thump of her mother’s heartbeat. 

“Mama,” Rose whimpers out in disbelief. “Real?”

“Very real,” Natasha confirms, and Rose stays there for a while to make sure she doesn’t simply vanish into thin air. She sits up to look at her properly, and she allows Rose to roam her little hands over her shoulders and neck. When her fingers reach her face, Natasha couldn’t help but kiss them as she traces her features, patting her cheeks and ghosting over her nose and lips.

“I feel you,” Rose cries in an incredulous whisper before launching herself back to wrap her arms around her neck. “I feel you! Real, Mama!”

“Yes, baby, I’m real. You’re home,” Natasha lets out a tearful laugh, hugging her fiercely. “Mama’s missed you so much.”

Rose doesn’t respond, simply content with being able to feel her again after so many nights of just dreams to keep her company.

“Jus’ stay here, Mama,” Rose mumbles against her neck. “Was so scared. Th-they—,”

“Shh, I know,” Natasha tells her, stroking the back of her head and being careful of her back. “I’m not letting you go anytime soon.”

Natasha hears a knock on the door and Rose jumps at the sound, her senses still on high alert.

“It’s just me and Wanda,” Steve calls from the other side of the door, and Natasha brings the blanket higher up over the both of them before calling them inside.

“She’s awake,” Steve smiles, kneeling down by the side of the bed while Wanda stays back to watch them interact. “Hi, sweet girl. You doing alright?”

Only Rose’s head peeks out from the blanket. “Real?” 

Steve looks at her confused before Natasha hums, lifting the blanket slightly to free her arm out to reach for his face, little fingers brushing over his hair and lightly tweaking his nose.

“You feel him, Rosie?” Natasha murmurs, and she feels a nod against her chest. “You want to feel Wanda too?”

Wanda comes forward and reaches her hand out, and Rose grips two of her ring-clad fingers, fiddling with them slightly before retracting it back into her blanket.

“Real, Mama,” Rose confirms before looking back at Steve. “Hi. M’okay.”

“We missed you, Rosie,” Steve smiles, leaning forward to kiss her forehead before glancing up and pressing one against Natasha’s as well. “Things aren’t the same without you around.”

Rose sniffles, her fingers under the blanket splaying over Natasha’s sides.

“We’ll play once you feel better,” Wanda offers, and Rose gives her a hopeful look at the promise. “We just came by to check on the both of you. We also brought food, we thought we’d help out a bit so you can spend more time with the little one.”

_Make up for lost time._ Seventeen days seemed like a short span of time but it was still seventeen days too long for them to be ripped away from each other without a moment’s notice. 

“Thank you,” Natasha looks between the both of them before back down at her daughter. “What do you think, baby? You hungry?”

Rose shakes her head, but leans closer to whisper in her ear. “Mil’?”

“Is it alright if we have it at the dinner table?” Natasha whispers back, and Rose ponders on it for a moment.

“Can I bring blanket?”

“Mmhmm.”

“Yeah,” Rose finally agrees, snuggling deeper. “Now?”

Natasha laughs, and Steve and Wanda smile at the exchange. They leave the room so they could prepare the food, and Natasha dresses the two of them again before taking Rose’s hand and leading her to the table. When Natasha leaves to make her bottle, Rose immediately jumps up, leaving her blanket on the chair to trail after her and loops her fingers around the belt hoop of her pants.

“I’ll bring your bottle to you, Rosie, you can go back to the table,” Natasha tells her, but Rose doesn’t relinquish her hold, slamming her forehead against her thigh defiantly.

“No, I go with you,” Rose mumbles against the fabric, and Natasha immediately understands. She lets her follow her around as she prepares her bottle, and when they get back to the table, Rose doesn’t waste any time in clambering up on her lap and reaching for her milk.

“Here you go,” Natasha shakes her head in slight amusement at her eagerness, but still disheartened that her attachment has turned into a more intense form of separation anxiety. As Rose has her bottle, Natasha converses with Steve and Wanda over dinner and they relish in slipping back into the normalcy of the weeks before.

When Rose finishes, she puts her bottle back on the table before pressing her cheek against Natasha’s chest, taking her hand and bringing her palm up to her other cheek.

“She’s snuggly,” Wanda comments, smiling at the sight. “You got through to her so fast.”

“I think she just needed extra proof I'm rea—oh no, Rosie," Natasha cuts herself off when she feels her daughter pull her thumb into her mouth. She tuts as she gently pulls it away, settling on stroking her cheek with her knuckles. "Touch helped a lot, as you can see.”

“Hey, Ro, are you sure you’re not hungry?” Steve asks, and Rose turns her head slightly, not wanting to fully pry herself away from her mother. “There’s still a bowl of noodles here if you’d like.”

Steve waits patiently for her response, and when she gives a shy nod, his smile brightens.

“Come over to this side, I’ll feed you.”

Natasha puts her down on her feet and Rose tentatively pads over to him, wincing slightly when he accidentally brushes his fingers against her back as he picks her up to sit on the chair next to him.

“Just the soup,” Natasha reminds him. “We have to ease her stomach into solids again.” 

As Steve intermittently feeds spoonfuls of broth in between his own bites, Rose keeps glancing over at Natasha, afraid that if she looked away for too long, she would disappear.

“You were hungry, huh,” Steve hums as he gives her the last spoon. Rose gives him a small smile before glancing to the side, panicking immediately when she doesn’t see Natasha.

“She just got your medicine, Rosie, look, she’s coming back,” Wanda reassures, feeling the spike of fear that coursed through her body. Rose bolts off the seat and runs towards her, patting her thigh a few times.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” Natasha sits back down, and she lifts Rose up to the seat next to her, cupping her cheek. “Remember this? It gets the bad stuff out of your body.”

“I get sick tomorrow?” Rose whispers solemnly, and Natasha sighs deeply. 

“Unfortunately. But you felt much better after a few days, remember?”

Rose nods once. “Did doct’r Cho make medicine to make my back feel better too?” Rose asks, more shyly this time. “Still hurts, Mama.”

“She did,” Natasha informs her, a sad smile on her face. “I’ll put it over after we wash for bed.”

When Rose doesn’t respond, Natasha measures out her dosage and brings it up to her lips. The little girl opens her mouth obediently, and Natasha kisses her forehead a few times right after. “Good girl, Rosie.”

They finish up with dinner and Steve heads back to his floor to give them more time alone, but Wanda hovers a bit after Steve enters the elevator.

“May I stay here for tonight? I can stay on the couch,” Wanda asks abruptly, her eyes trained on the floor. “I saw her thoughts on the jet and I just want to make sure she sleeps well tonight.”

Natasha’s gaze softens, suddenly reminded that Rose’s disappearance had a much bigger impact on the team than she gave them credit for.

“Of course,” Natasha agrees. “I’ll fix the couch. You have clothes?” 

“I will change in my room,” Wanda says with a small smile. “Thank you.” 

"No problem. See you in a bit."

When Natasha turns around, she sees Rose peeking through the bathroom door.

"Alright, little shadow. Let's clean you up," Natasha walks over to the bathroom and sits her down over the toilet lid, removing her dress and the pull up the medbay had put her in. She runs a small towel under warm water and wrings it before gently running it over her skin.

"No bath?" Rose asks as Natasha asks her to stand up to get the back of her legs.

"Not for a few days, just until your back can take it. Can you take a deep breath for me?" Natasha murmurs, and when Rose lets out a deep exhale, she gently wipes the cloth across her back to clean off the salve they've put so they could reapply it later. Rose twitches in pain when the cloth scrapes across her back, and Natasha makes sure to be as gentle as she can.

"Mama, it hurts," Rose whimpers, her voice wobbling. 

"Shh, I know. Just a bit more," Natasha urges, trying to hasten her motions but when she brushes over a particularly nasty cut with a bit of salve left in the corner, Rose yelps out in pain.

"Sorry, I'm sorry, baby," Natasha quickly coos, turning her around and cupping her cheeks. “We’ll just brush your teeth then we’re done. I'll put the medicine for your back in your room."

Rose sniffles as she nods, rubbing her eyes with her fist. They finish up in the bathroom and Natasha pats her dry with a larger towel, being careful of the newly exposed lashes on her back. She puts her in a pull up as a precaution and asks her to lay down on her stomach on her bed so they could reapply the salve.

Helen had informed them that she was too young to go through tissue regeneration, but had instead come up with a gel solution that would help heal her wounds in a shorter amount of time. She had promised that it wouldn’t sting, but with how large and deep some of the lacerations were, even the act of blowing over her wounds without the salve would be rather painful for her to take.

“Deep breath, Rosie,” Natasha gives her a heads up as she scoops a bit of it on her fingers, and when she sees her daughter’s ribs expand, she slides it over the first wound and was met with a surprised shriek.

“Mama!” Rose howls out, her little fingers gripping the sheets tightly. “Hurts!”

At that time, Wanda peeks her head in, already dressed down to her sleepwear. Rose whimpers loudly as she jumps as the sudden sound and Natasha leans over to kiss the back of her head.

“Do you need any help?” Wanda asks tentatively, and Natasha looks down at the salve then back at her, the young witch moving forward when she sees her nod. “What do I do?”

“I’ll hold her. Can you put a thin layer over her wounds?” Natasha asks, gently cooing at Rose as she lays her back low against the headboard and bringing her daughter to lay on top of her. Wanda picks up the salve next to her and climbs up on the bed as well, kneeling next to the pair.

“Look, Rosie. Wanda’s here. Mama’s going to hold you while she puts your medicine, alright? Deep breaths for me,” Natasha tells her, running her hands over her arms. “In and out, that’s it.”

“No, don’t like,” Rose protests weakly, trying to wriggle away but Natasha leans her head down near her ear, softly shushing and whispering for her to calm down. She gives Wanda a sideways glance as she wraps her arm over the top of her shoulders and another below her bum, her hand firmly grasping her thigh.

When Wanda adds a stroke across a long gash, Rose arches her back as she shrieks in Natasha’s ear, gripping her arms tightly.

“Shh, baby. Mama’s got you,” Natasha reassures over her cries, her lips pressed against her temple. “Wanda, keep going. Be quick.”

“No, Mama!” Rose hiccups, letting out another shrill cry when the salve touches her skin. “Ma - _ma! Make it stop!_ ”

“ Almost finished, malyshka,” Wanda murmurs, her eyes watering at her distress. She glances over at Natasha and finds that she’s in a similar position, pressing light kisses while holding her tight to keep her from thrashing.

“Just a bit more, baby, you’re doing so well,” Natasha tells her, trying her best to steel her voice. “In and out. Focus on Mama.” 

_ “I don’t like you!” _ Rose screeches out as Wanda covers the last one, and the little girl slumps against her mother, writhing at the stinging sensation across her entire back. 

“I know,” Natasha breathes. “I know. Over now, baby.” 

As moments pass, the salve works its way into her wounds and she sighs in relief when the pain begins to subside and turns into a dull ache.

“Let’s get you dressed,” Natasha whispers, but Rose shakes her head.

“Don’t want it to touch."

Natasha concedes, asking Friday to bring up the temperature a bit so they could forego using a blanket.

Wanda scoots away from the pair as Natasha gingerly rolls them over on their sides. Rose slithers her hand under Natasha’s shirt and palms at her spine, her fingers splaying out and tracing the slight jut of bones.

“Don’t go. M’sorry, don’t mean it,” Rose whines when Natasha shifts to a more comfortable position. “Stay, please. Love you. I love you, Mama.”

“It’s okay. I love you too, Rosie,” Natasha lets out a watery chuckle at her words, glancing up at Wanda and mouthing a ‘thank you’.

“I’ll be outside,” Wanda whispers, not wanting to interrupt the pair but Rose lets out a soft hum.

“Wanda?” Rose asks, her voice hoarse and slightly muffled. “Love you, too.”

Wanda grins, a few tears escaping her eyes. “Love you, Rosie. Rest well. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“‘Kay,” Rose mumbles, her eyes slowly fluttering closed. Natasha lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, then looks back up at Wanda.

“That went well,” Natasha deadpans, and Wanda snorts out a laugh. “Thanks again. Are you really comfortable taking the couch? You could always kip in her room, I’ll just have to give you access.” 

“No, it’s alright,” Wanda sits back down on the bed, trying to focus her eyes on anywhere else than the lacerations on Rose's back. “She’s so young but she’s been through so much.”

Natasha exhales deeply in affirmation. Rose whimpers and she brings her hand down to her hip, patting it softly to coax her into a deeper sleep. 

“I hate what they’ve done to her,” Natasha confesses. “I hate seeing her in pain but there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to make her feel safe again.”

Wanda looks on before tentatively reaching out to place her hand over Natasha’s.

“Do you know why they were unsuccessful in wiping us from her memory?” Wanda brings up quietly, and Natasha looks at her, waiting for her response. "It's because no matter how many times they tried, she trusted that you would rescue her. There was no doubt in her mind that her Mama would come to take her away because she had done it before and she can do it again."

Natasha stares almost incredulously before her eyes look down at her daughter, a deeper devotion blooming in her heart at finding out about her unwavering trust in her.

Wanda squeezes her hand, and Natasha lets out a shaky, grateful breath.

"I know you would do anything for her because you have. And believe me when I say that she knows that too, and she loves you _so much_ for it." 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few days after Rose’s abduction.

“Can you tell me where you are?”

Natasha waits for her daughter to respond, but was met with an indifferent stare. 

It’s been four days since Rose had been rescued back from her abduction and even though she had managed to converse properly her first night back at the compound, she seems to have shut down and retreated into herself the succeeding days after, not speaking much apart from little sounds to communicate her contentment or discomfort. 

Neither of the two get much rest in between Rose’s sleep being plagued by night terrors, and Natasha trying her best to accommodate her daughter and making sure that she knows that she’s safe and sound at all times. 

No matter how much she reassures, though, there are still moments when Rose spaces out and forgets where she is, her thoughts blurring the lines between current reality and previous memory. She is constantly exhausted by the mental turmoil, and it manifests in how she jumps at sudden sounds and how complacent she is with everything that is asked of her. 

“Hey, baby,” Natasha crouches down, cupping her cheek. “Can you feel me?”

Rose brings her hand up to hold Natasha’s cheek in a similar fashion, with her mother turning her head to kiss the inside of her wrists. “Atta girl. Are you hungry, hmm? What do you want for breakfast?”

Rose stares again before moving to bring her thumb to her mouth.

“Can you use your words?” Natasha asks gently, attempting to pull her hand away from Rose whines, shrugging her off. “You’re going to have to help me out, I can’t read your mind.”

Rose huffs out a breath before pressing her forehead against her shoulder, turning her head slightly. Natasha embraces her close and Rose coos in contentment, rubbing her nose against her neck.

“Alright, I’ll think of something,” Natasha softens, lifting her up in her arms. “You want scrambled eggs?” 

She feels a feeble nod under her chin and she sets to literally single-handedly prepare their breakfast. Just as she’s about to beat the eggs, Steve walks into their kitchen and was welcomed with the sight of a pliant Rose with her cheek smushed up against Natasha’s shoulder. 

“Good morning,” Steve greets warmly, coming closer to kiss the tops of their heads, grinning when he notices Rose preening slightly at the affection. She shifts slightly and reaches a hand out, opening and closing her little fist as a silent request to be transferred. Steve carefully takes her from Natasha and soundly kisses her cheek, eliciting a soft sigh in response. “Hello to you too, sweetheart. Did you sleep well?” 

Rose, as he expected, doesn’t answer, opting to play with the lining of his shirt instead.

“You’re still not talking, huh?” Steve frowns, swaying Rose slightly. Natasha shakes her head, transferring the eggs from the pan and a few pieces of bread on the plates.

Natasha sets the table and sits down with Steve taking his usual spot across her, lifting Rose to set her down on the chair next to him.

“You look exhausted, Nat,” Steve comments a few minutes into breakfast, earning a quirked eyebrow from the woman in question.

“You must’ve been a real hit with the ladies,” Natasha quips, but her tone sounds as beaten down as she apparently looks. “We just had a rough night.”

“That’s an understatement,” Steve frowns, looking between the pair and the similar weary on their faces could have been comical if it weren’t so heartbreaking. “I could—,”

“I’ve got it,” Natasha huffs dismissively, spearing a bit of egg onto her fork with slightly more force than necessary.

“I know you do, but it doesn’t hurt to take help when it’s offered,” Steve reaches for a tissue and wipes the sides of Rose’s mouth. “Right, Ro?”

Rose doesn’t flinch when Steve cleans her up, absentmindedly eating without much enthusiasm.

“I’m serious, you need to rest,” Steve pushes, worry etched in his voice. “I don’t have anything planned, I’ll watch Rosie for the day. Take a few to recharge.”

He words it as a command but he knows that it’s ultimately Natasha’s decision, and he lets out a small sigh of relief when her shoulders slump down and concedes.

“Just a few hours, and you call me if anything happens,” Natasha reminds him, and he nods readily, reaching out to caress the back of Rose’s head.

“I’ve got her, don’t worry.”

Steve takes a restless Rose to the common area in the afternoon as soon as Natasha’s head hits the pillow, only heeding his advice out of sheer exhaustion. They spot Bucky on the couch watching a documentary on the screen, and when he gives Rose a big smile, it only slightly dissipates when he feels the little girl’s somber mood.

“Hey, darlin’,” Bucky greets, raising his hand up for a customary high live and Rose only stares, sitting down next to him when Steve prompts her to do so. “Hey, what happened?”

“She’s been like this for days, Buck,” Steve informs him, sitting down as well and wedging Rose in the middle. “She was talking and everything when we got her back but after that she just went silent.”

“Where’s Nat?”

“She’s sleeping, I have her for the day so she could rest a bit.”

Bucky frowns, knowing exactly how Rose feels and it guts him to see the same behavior is someone so young. Without another word, Bucky turns his flesh hand up, a silent invitation for Rose to initiate contact. 

Almost half a hour passes, Bucky staying perfectly still with Steve leaning back against the couch with his arm draped over his eyes. Rose comes to her senses for a moment a gingerly raises her hand to place it over his, the tips of her fingers reaching only until the edges of his palm.

"It's overwhelming," Bucky murmurs, and Steve's ears prick at his voice, restraining from sitting up in case the sudden movement spooks Rose. "You been thinking a lot?"

Rose stays still, taking a few moments to make sense of his words, and the stillness of the moment has her giving him an almost imperceptible nod.

"What have you been thinking about?" Bucky asks, his voice never going any louder than a whisper, his hand never tensing under her touch. "We're here, I'm with you. But you forget sometimes, don't ya, darlin'?" 

Rose gives him a clearer nod this time, her fingers slightly trembling above his palm. Bucky doesn't move, waiting for Rose to initiate further, and when she curls her fingers over his thumb, she gives it a tentative squeeze.

"Did they use the chair?" Bucky asks nonchalantly, and Steve flinches slightly at the loaded question.

"Buck," Steve warns, sitting up to draw Rose close to him. Rose only tenses up but Bucky puts his metal hand over hers, sandwiching her hand in between both of his.

"Whip.”

Rose mostly mouths out the word, her voice stuck in her throat from not using it for a few days. Bucky doesn’t make any sudden movements, carefully pressing his palms together to create a small pressure around her hand. 

"Does it still hurt?” Bucky follows up, and Rose nods once, her body tensing slightly as she glances at Steve at the corner of her eye and it takes a while before she relaxes, Steve taking her other hand and allowing her to squeeze two of his fingers.

"It takes a while. You know, when I got away, I didn’t want to talk to anyone either,” Bucky reveals, turning her palm over and drawing light circles over it. “But I got better when I did. It helps to talk about it even if it’s hard, at least it’s not just inside you.”

Rose swallows thickly, but the repetitive movement on her hand soothes her, closing her eyes as she tries to find her voice. 

"Mama don't like when I tell,” Rose whispers, squeezing Steve's fingers tightly. “She don’t know.”

"What doesn’t she know?”

"How m’ny times...what they make me do,” Rose sniffles, and Steve fights the urge to lift her on his lap and shield her from the world. “She say I’m okay and safe. But I still hurt.”

"I’ll talk to Nat about it,” Steve promises, moving to drop a kiss on the crown of her head but Bucky gives him a pointed look, silently telling him to hold back first on the affection.

"Do you want to tell me instead?” Bucky offers, and Rose, more relaxed Steve has seen her in days, nods but keeps quiet for a few minutes, the two men staying still and making sure that the time was hers for the taking.

When Rose opens her mouth and tells them what she remembers while she was awake, she describes it to the best of her ability. Her hands start to tremble as she continues to speak, her voice low and hoarse, and Bucky had to remind her to take her time, to breathe in between, and she carries on until she presses her forehead against his bicep, wiping her tears on his sleeve.

"Th-that’s it,” Rose heaves out. "M'always scared. I try to be brave but it's really hard."

"I think you’re the bravest person I’ve ever met,” Bucky tells her honestly, gently squeezing her hands. "You wanna know something?"

Rose nods, and Bucky leans in conspiratorially as if letting her in on a secret.

"I'm always a little scared too."

Rose pulls away, a surprised look on her face. "Really?"

"Mmhmm. The bravest people are always a little bit scared."

Rose shuffles forward, her voice dropping to a more reverent whisper. "Even Mama?"

"Even your Mama. You can ask her, I'm sure she'll tell you," Bucky confirms, patting the top of her head. "How do you feel now?”

"Tired,” Rose responds, sniffling slightly. “You get whip too?”

"I got that  _ and _ the chair, and that’s not fun at all,” Bucky admits, trying to ignore how Steve stiffens at his words. “I didn’t have my Ma to help me out, but I’m glad you do. You’ve got Stevie here too.”

"An’ you.”

Bucky gives her a soft smile.

"Did your back heal nicely at least?” Bucky asks just as Rose attempts to clamber up to straddle Steve's lap. He feels a soft nod against his chest, the little girl giving him her full weight.

"Mama make it better,” Rose mumbles around her thumb. “Hurts a lo' but not much after."

At that moment, Natasha walks in looking more refreshed but at the sight of her daughter's slightly trembling form, she all but rushes forward, sitting on the coffee table in front of them.

"What happened?” Natasha asks immediately, reaching forward to place a hand on her shoulder. “I told you to get me when something like this happens, Steve—shh, baby, you’re okay.”

“She’s not,” Steve tells her tightly, and Natasha’s eyes flicker to her in slight surprise. “She’s been keeping a lot of things in—,”

“She talked?” The silent  _and not to me_ hangs heavily in the air. “Now I’m really upset. I would’ve—,”

“Told her that everything’s alright, like just now,” Bucky speaks up, and an imperceptible look crosses Natasha’s face, trying to bite back a snippy response. “But it’s not. She needed to unpack everything that happened to her and you wouldn’t allow that.”

“I don’t want her reliving that by telling me,” Natasha bites back, bringing her hand down. “She gets enough nightmares as it is.”

“But she needs to process everything. She wants to tell you and you need to listen to her so you know how to help her better, not just shut her off and tell her that everything’s fine,” Bucky tries to keep the accusation out of his voice, knowing that Rose was most likely listening in and didn’t want her to pick up on the heated conversation.

A flash of hurt crosses Natasha’s face before settling it back to a steady glare, her mind thinking back on all the times she’s cut her off after a nightmare or just recently when she had tried to let her know what they had done to her after coming to her senses, and she doesn’t realize until late that her desire to protect her was also the same reason why Rose had become so reluctant to open up.

“Rosie, can you come to me for a bit?” Natasha requests gently, but her daughter attempts to hide further into Steve, grabbing his arms to wrap them around her back.

“M’sorry, Mama,” Rose mumbles into his shirt, and Natasha’s frown deepens. “Don’t be mad.” 

“I’m not mad,” Natasha says honestly, feeling her throat closing up. “And if anyone should be sorry, it should be me.” 

Rose doesn’t move to transfer herself into her mother’s arms, and Natasha quickly stands up, her tears threatening to spill over.

“You have her for the day, right?” Natasha asks dismissively, and Steve nods, not sure how to react. “Alright. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?”

“You have her for the day,” Natasha repeats. “That includes the night. Like you said, I'm taking time for myself. Just following orders.”

“Sorry,” Rose offers again, her voice trembling and muffled against fabric.

“You have nothing to apologize for,” Natasha tells her, almost detached as she squeezes her shoulder one last time before bolting out of the common area and disappearing behind the elevator doors.

“Mama leaved me,” Rose’s panicked voice carries out a few moments later, as if finally realizing the gravity of the situation. She wriggles away from Steve’s grasp as she bursts into tears. “Mama’s mad and she leave me! Steve, don’t want Mama to leave!”

“Calm down, Rosie, Nat’s not mad,” Steve tries to diffuse the situation, quickly grabbing Rose by the waist when she attempts to make a beeline towards the elevator. “And she didn’t leave, she’d never do that. She’s just taking the day to herself.”

“No!”

“Rosie—,”

“No! I telled you and Mama leaved me!” Rose wails, attempting to squirm away from Steve’s arms as he picks her up. She hiccups and slams her face against his shirt, muffling the loud cries her little body was producing.

“Shh, Rosie,” Steve’s attempts of placating her falls on deaf ears. “Okay. Okay, sweetheart. I’ll bring you to your Mama.”

Giving Bucky a knowing glance, Steve picks up his pace in walking towards the elevator and making his way towards Natasha’s floor. He steps in, Rose’s wails still ringing near his ears, and the sound of her sobs echo throughout the place. He walks towards Natasha’s room and was relieved to find her there, lying down on the bed with her back facing the door.

“Nat, thank God, I—,” Steve tries to say above Rose’s cries, but she wriggles out of his hold and almost sprints over to her side, only slightly quieting at the blank, almost empty expression on her face.

“M-mama?” Rose tries, reaching out to touch her shoulder but she doesn’t respond, her mind seemingly elsewhere. “Mama, hold me.”

“Go to Steve,” Natasha mumbles, closing her eyes and burying her face into the pillow. Rose gently shakes her shoulder and when that doesn’t suffice, does so a bit harder. “Go away.”

Steve watches on, not entirely sure how to approach. He’s never seen Natasha so cold towards her daughter before, and he wanted to make sure that Rose’s heart doesn’t break even further than it already has.

“Rosie, let’s give your Mama some space,” Steve walks around and kneels beside Rose, frowning at Natasha’s current state. “C’mon.”

“No,” Rose sniffles, grabbing Natasha’s hand and grasping two of her fingers, crying out when she pulls her hand away. “Mama, please.”

“Steve,” Natasha groans out, her voice tight. It was almost pleading, and he hesitates for only a second before picking Rose up in his arms only for the little girl’s cries to start again, fully thrashing now. 

_“Mama!”_ Rose screeches out, reaching towards her mother and nearly wriggling out of Steve’s grasp. “Mama, hold! _H-hold!_ ”

Something in Natasha wakes, as if her daughter’s pained cries had managed to snap her out of her self-loathing trance. With her eyes still closed, she turns her head and reaches for her daughter with an outstretched arm, the rest of her body still flush against the sheets.

“Shh,” Natasha quickly soothes as Steve carefully places Rose down and she holds her tight against her, a hand cupping the back of her head. “Shh, Rosie.”

“M-mama, sorry, don’t leave me ‘gain please,” Rose frantically hiccups against her neck, little hands holding on to the front of her shirt for dear life. “Mama, Mama, I-I’m—,”

“Breathe,” Natasha instructs, her heart constricting at her daughter’s panicked state. “In and out slowly. I’m not going anywhere.”

Warm tears and saliva coat Natasha’s clavicle and Rose’s leg hikes over her hip. Steve leaves to give them some privacy as Natasha murmurs small words of encouragement, her finger drawing little circles on Rose’s scalp to calm her down even further. 

“M-mama,” Rose whispers, repeating her name like a prayer. “I stay with you. Don’t leave. Jus’ want you, Mama.”

Rose’s honest babbles are like a knife to the heart, but she doesn’t curl around her like she usually does, keeping her body straight against her.

“Better?” Natasha asks, and she feels a small nod accompanied by a sniffle. “Good.”

They stay like that for a while, and when Natasha moves lower down the pillow, Rose lets out a small whimper.

“I...I want to tell you first but you don’t want,” Rose chokes on her voice, sniffling slightly. “So I tell Bucky. He gots whip too.”

Natasha inhales deeply. “It’s not that I don’t want to listen to you tell me these things, it’s just that I know how scary it is to look back on them,” Natasha responds, her finger never stopping its ministrations on the back of her head.“That’s why I don’t want you thinking about that. I didn’t realize that it was something that you might’ve needed.”

“But you got mad and leaved me,” Rose frowns, holding her tighter in case she makes her go away again. “Won’t talk ‘bout it again. Jus’ don’t go, Mama.”

At the prospect of her daughter adjusting for her sake, the dam finally breaks. She curls her spine and presses her nose into the top of her head, her body trembling with the intensity of her sobs.

“I’m sorry,” Natasha whispers shakily, her eyes screwed shut to keep more tears from escaping her eyes. “I’m  _ so  _ sorry, baby.”

Rose stays quiet, allowing her mother to hold her as tightly as she wants to.

“Maybe I don’t really know what I’m doing,” Natasha confesses under her breath, sniffling as she tries to reign in her emotions. “I should’ve let them give you a real family. I don’t...I don’t think that I’m a good Mama for you.” 

“But you’re my Mama,” Rose murmurs into her neck, pulling away slightly to look up at her face as earnestly as she can with puffy eyes. “You’re a good Mama. Best ever.” 

Natasha wants to laugh. She wants to laugh and accept her words as fact but she can’t find it in her heart to do so, so she settles with squeezing her tight through a shaky exhale.

A few minutes pass in silence, and as small voice cuts through the rustling sheets and sniffling noses. “...am I good Rosie?”

“What?”

“I promised to be best Rosie,” Rose mumbles, her eyes downcast. “But I wake up with bad dreams an’ I wet the bed and make you mad an’...a-and—,”

“Rosie—,”

“M’always scared that if I’m not best Rosie you don’t want me ‘nymore.” 

Natasha lets out a choked sob, holding her tight against her before sitting up and resting against the headboard, Rose’s body draped over her with her head resting above her breast.

“Baby,” Natasha heaves out, swallowing thickly. “Nothing, and I mean nothing, will make me not want you. I’m sorry for making you think that I don’t. You’re always going to be my best girl, whatever you do. I’m always going to love you.”

“Even when I’m quiet or...or when I don’t do what you say an’ you get f’ust’ated?”

“Even then,” Natasha confirms with a hint of a smile. “Hey, whatever you need to tell me, no matter how much you think it’ll upset me, I’ll listen. I’m promising you that right now.” 

Rose hums her approval, snuggling deeper into her hold. A few traitor tears escape Natasha’s eyes just as her daughter peers up at her. She reaches out to swipe at her mother’s cheek and she huffs out a watery laugh at the gesture. 

“S’okay, Mama. Rosie’s got you.” 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha gets injured on a mission, Steve and Rose try to cope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from steveandnatlover: Rosie has to deal with the fact Nat got injured on a mission and afterwards she helps Steve nurse her back to health.
> 
> Again, I took a few liberties with this one but it’s still overall the same idea.
> 
> Hope you enjoy, and Happy New Year! x

“When is Mama coming home?”

Rose tugs on Bucky’s pant leg for the nth time that afternoon, her other hand occupied with keeping her blanket from falling from her shoulders.

“What did I tell you just a few minutes ago?”

“T’morrow morning.”

“The answer’s still the same,” Bucky patiently reiterates, carding his hand through her hair before moving to sit on the couch. “Come on, let’s find something to watch.”

With practically the entire team being sent out on a mission, Bucky had volunteered to stay back and hold the fort down at the compound, which automatically included looking after Rose for a couple of days. She had gotten used to her mother being out for long stretches of time, but she’s understandably anxious this time around as this was the first mission after her abduction.

“Why didn’t you go with ‘em?” Rose asks after a while, leaning against Bucky’s side. He chuckles warmly, wrapping his arm around her shoulders to pull her closer.

“The team can handle themselves just fine without me,” Bucky simplifies. “Plus, who would look after you?”

“I dunno,” Rose shrugs, toying with the corners of her blanket. “Don’t like when Mama goes. Or anyone. Just want ‘v’ryone to stay here.”

“We would if we could, doll,” Bucky rubs her arm consolingly. “But hey, they’ll be back before you know it.”

A few hours after Bucky puts Rose to sleep that night, Friday redirects a call to him in Natasha’s living quarters, the holographic screen immediately pulling up a fairly distressed Steve.

“She asleep?” Steve opens with that, sounding every bit like a concerned father. Bucky bites back the retort at his sullen face and nods.

“Set her down just before nine. What’s wrong?”

“It’s Nat,” Steve tells him, and Bucky catches him rub the back of his neck. “Mission went well but Nat had to play bait to lead us in. We’re flying back now and Bruce is still trying to fully calm himself down before he attempts to check on her.”

“Jesus,” Bucky frowns. “Is she awake at least?”

“She’s been slipping in and out,” Steve’s breath catches in his throat. “When we got her from the room, she was just tied up there, I can’t—,”

“Nat’s gonna pull through, I’m sure she’s dealt with worse,” Bucky tries to reassure him. “Deep breaths, Steve, I can hear your blood vessels bursting.”

“I’m terrified, Buck,” Steve admits in a low whisper, letting out a shaky exhale. “I’ve never seen her like this.”

Bucky hears a faint whimper from across the room and straightens up slightly, looking up to meet hologram Steve’s eyes.

“She’s tougher than you give her credit for,” Bucky informs him, digging deep into his bank of hazy memories. “Plus, Rosie’s been waiting for her. Nat wouldn’t let her down.”

“Christ, Rosie,” Steve huffs out. “Could you—,”

“Have Friday notify me when you land and I’ll bring her to you straight.”

“I’ll go to you,” Steve nods, his face showing nothing but gratitude. “I owe you one.”

“You owe me nothing,” Bucky waves him off. “Go check on her. I’ve got it covered here.”

The team arrives back at the compound just a little after four in the morning, an unconscious Natasha being wheeled towards the medbay the minute they land to seek immediate attention. Just as Bucky was about to head towards Rose’s room to transfer her to Steve’s floor to make things easier for him, Steve walks into the living area with a frantic Wanda hot on his heels, wanting to help out in any way she could.

“I was about to...” Bucky trails off when Steve shakes his head.

“She has trouble sleeping through the night,” Steve informs him before looking down at his uniform. “I’ll just change and stay until she wakes up.”

“I’m staying as well,” Wanda says, not leaving any room for argument. “Clint is with Natasha in the medbay.”

“How is she?”

“Bruce hooked her to an emergency IV but she vomited twice before fully passing out,” Steve recounts with a frown. “She stopped being responsive around thirty minutes before we got down. I’ve never seen Clint land so fast.”

“Alright. Go change, shower and maybe nap if you can,” Bucky quickly shifts the topic, wanting to give the team a bit of a breather. “She won’t be up until eight, then we’ll bring Rosie to see Nat when she’s stable.”

“Did you get any sleep at all?” Steve asks Bucky, who shakes his head and gives him a half smile.

“Nah, but I’m fine,” Bucky waves his hand, shooing them away. Wanda turns on her heel and makes her way to her floor, but Steve simply starts walking towards Natasha’s quarters.

“Huh,” Bucky couldn’t help shooting him an amused look and a quirked eyebrow. “I knew you were together, I didn’t realize that you were  _together_ together.”

Steve only shrugs, but lets a small smile linger long enough for Bucky to see before stepping into the room to change.

“Punk,” Bucky mutters under his breath, mentally smacking his friend.

Steve emerges from the room half an hour later in sweatpants and an old shirt, sitting next to Bucky on the couch and leaning back, flopping his forearm over his eyes.

“How was she?” Steve mumbles, not wanting to fully disturb the quiet of the early morning.

“She’s great as usual. Never gave me a hard time,” Bucky says honestly, and Steve hums at the information.

“Did she ask for Nat?”

“Every five minutes.”

“Sounds about right,” Steve chuckles, and Bucky laughs along as well. A beat of silence washes over them before he speaks again. “Did...did she ask for me?”

“Once or twice,” Bucky recalls. “Why?”

“No reason,” Steve shifts in his spot, sinking deeper into the cushions. “She’s just a Mama’s girl.”

Bucky nods, then turns to look at his friend. “You want her to miss you like that.”

“I can’t help it,” Steve inwardly groans. He opens his mouth to explain but Wanda waltzes in, sitting on the armchair next to them.

“What can’t you help?” Wanda asks, catching the last bit of their conversation.

“Steve has Daddy issues.”

“Shut up,” Steve sulks, huffing out a breath when the two other living room occupants share a hushed laugh.

A few more hours pass and like clockwork, Rose drowsily pokes her head out of her door just a little after eight. She perks up at the sight of Steve and Wanda in the living room and makes a beeline towards the former, pressing her forehead against his shoulder as she yawns.

“Hi. Hi, miss you,” Rose greets sweetly despite her sleepy state. 

“Hey, sweetheart. I’ve missed you too,” Steve’s smile reaches his eyes, wrapping his arms around her small form and lifting her to sit sideways on his lap. She wraps her blanket tighter around her shoulders, snuffling slightly at the cold morning air. “Did you sleep well?”

“Yea,” Rose affirms, a small smile on her face at the fact that she had managed to get through the night without nightmares plaguing her sleep. “Good dreams.”

“I’m so happy to hear that, Ro. You remember what you dreamt about?” Steve prompts, and Rose furrows her eyebrows, shaking her head slightly.

“No, f’rgot. M’sorry,” Rose whispers, latching on to her thumb. Steve tuts and shakes his head, pressing a kiss against her temple.

“Don’t worry about it,” Steve reassures her. Rose coos a bit before sitting up a bit straighter, looking at Bucky and Wanda.

“Is Mama ‘sleep?”  Wanda’s face falters slightly, but Rose presses on, tapping Steve’s collarbone. “Is morning now. Bucky says she be back in the morning. Can I wake her up?”

“She’s in the medbay, Rosie,” Steve takes a deep breath, bracing himself for the worst. “Your Mama got hurt in the mission but Dr. Cho is doing everything she can to make her better.”

“Hurt?” Rose asks, her voice cracking as she speaks. She’s never seen her mother physically hurt in any capacity, so the image of her being battered and bruised feels like too much for her to wrap her head around.

“Yeah, Ro,” Steve sighs out, gently rubbing her back over the blanket. “She’ll be alright, though. Nat’s one of the toughest people I know.”

“Wanna see Mama,” Rose whimpers into his chest. “P’ease.”

“I don’t think that’s a g—oh, honey, no,” Steve cuts himself off when he feels the front of his shirt dampen with tears, his arms trying to securely wrap around her shaking form. “Shh, calm down, Ro. We just need to wait until Clint or Dr. Cho says it’s okay to visit her.”

“It’s okay, Rosie,” Wanda tries to placate her as well, reaching over to gently stroke her fist that was tightly balling Steve’s shirt. “She’ll wake up soon.”

“I-I wanna wake her up,” Rose hiccups through her sobs, sniffling loudly. “Can I?”

“Incoming message from Mr. Barton,” Friday chimes in as if on cue, Clint’s voice filling the room a few beats after. _“She’s stable but still unconscious. They’ve just finished with tissue regeneration and they’re transferring her to a regular room in a bit. They’re still monitoring her and they don’t know when she’ll come around but you can bring Rosie by in the afternoon.”_

“Did you hear that, Ro? We get to see her in a few hours,” Steve bounces his leg slightly to jostle the little girl, but she grabs onto Wanda’s fingers at the sudden movement. “Hey, are you hungry? I’ll make you anything you want.”

“Pancakes,” Bucky fake-coughs out, eliciting a watery smile from the four year old.

“Come here, malyshka, do you want to play while we wait for Steve to make us breakfast?” Wanda tries to entice her, and she waits for Rose to give her a small nod before taking her from his lap to set her down on the floor, following suit right next to her. She pulls out a small basket from underneath the coffee table and wipes the last of Rose’s tears away before they take a few toys out to play with.

Steve sets off to make breakfast and Bucky opted to stay with the pair in the living room, sitting down across them and watching the Rose build a small house made out of bricks while Wanda focused on scavenging through the basket for little lego people to add in.

“Look,” Rose’s small voice pipes up after a few minutes of silence, and he’s surprised when he sees her outstretched palm with a lego figurine that had a gray arm attachment. “Like you.”

“Well I’ll be,” Bucky takes the impossibly tiny lego man and holds it between his fingers. “It does look like me.”

They play for a little while longer until Steve calls them to the kitchen to eat. They leave Natasha’s usual spot empty and Rose frowns at the sight of it, tugging on Steve’s sleeve to get his attention.

“Did you leave some for Mama?” Rose asks, looking down at her star-shaped pancakes that had become her regular request.

“I made just enough for the four of us,” Steve says, but reassures her in the same breath. “But I’ll make her a fresh batch later if she wants them.”

“She liked the heart ones you made before. She told me.”

Steve feels his ears and cheeks warm over at the mention of it, but he ignores Bucky’s snickers and Wanda’s teasing look before shaking his head.

“I’ll make sure to make them heart shaped, then,” Steve smiles, and she seems pleased with his answer when she doesn’t push any further. He proceeds to cut her stack up into manageable pieces before looking up, clearing his throat. “Not a word.”

“I think it’s sweet,” Wanda supplies, taking a bite from her short stack and sighing contentedly. “Reminds me of my own father.”

Steve visibly softens at the admission, squaring his shoulders slightly. They settle into a comfortable silence, only the sounds of utensils scraping against plates filling the room.

When afternoon rolls around, Rose’s easy demeanor from earlier had all but vanished as they make their way towards where Natasha was relocated in the rehabilitation area of the compound.

Steve has Rose perched on his hip as he enters, the sterile smell immediately assaulting his senses. His eyes scan the room—Clint was asleep on the small couch against the wall, and Natasha, to his surprise, was hooked up to less machines than he had initially anticipated. She still had bruising present on her face, most notably her right eye, and a smattering on her arms, but he knows that she has some form of serum not too different from his and expected them to heal by tomorrow, if not by the end of the day.

The little girl catches a glimpse of her mother, unmoving and injured, and she whimpers at the sight just before Steve brings his hand up to hide her face into his neck. Wanda helpfully hands Rose her blanket and she grasps for it blindly, holding it tight against her chest.

“Oh, hey,” Clint groans from behind him, stretching in his seat. “Cho will fill you in later, but since her kid’s present I’ll spare you the details. Her healing factor’s kicking in which is good, her body’s not rejecting the fluids like it did in the quintjet.”

“Why do I sense a ‘but’?” Bucky asks, crossing his arms as he leans against the wall.

Clint gives Rose a quick glance, and Steve presses his palm over her ear to hopefully muffle the sounds out.

“The amount of tranquilizers they used to take her down would’ve killed an army, it’s a miracle she’s managed to stay alive as long as she did before we got to her. Cho said that she should be waking up soon.”

“How soon?” Wanda doesn’t tear her gaze away from Natasha’s form on the hospital bed.

“She said to give her a few days, but knowing Nat she’ll probably come around in a few hours, maybe tomorrow at the latest,” Clint shrugs his shoulders. “Nat has gone through worse.” 

Clint tilts his chin towards Rose and Steve puts his hand down from the side of her face.

“Hey, baby bird,” Clint reaches out to caress her cheek with a curled finger. “You wanna come talk to your Mama? Hearing your voice might make her wake up faster.”

Rose nods, but when Clint tries to get her from Steve’s hold, she whines loudly in protest, an arm locking around his neck.

“Wanna stay with Steve,” Rose admits in a small voice, and Steve can’t help but feel a surge of pride at her insistence to stay with him.

“I’ve got you, Ro,” Steve murmurs, turning his cheek to drop a quick kiss on the crown of her head.

“Let’s give the little family some privacy,” Clint smirks, but shoots Steve a genuine look of understanding before ushering Bucky and Wanda out of the room.

“C’mon,” Steve hikes Rose higher up on his hip before grabbing a nearby chair and pulling it next to the hospital bed. Steve carefully leans down and gently presses his lips against Natasha’s forehead. “Hi, love. I have Rosie with me. Ro, you wanna say hello?”

Steve sits down on the chair and sets Rose on his lap. She can’t help but stare at the bruising around her face and body and she doesn’t dare reaching out and touching her just yet, terrified of adding on to her injuries. Her little face crumples suddenly and cries into his shoulder, broken but quiet sobs racking her frame.

Steve quickly stands up and takes a few steps away from the bed, rubbing her back and swaying slightly in place in hopes of soothing her. He takes her security blanket and wraps it around her shoulders, shifting her around slightly until she’s fully cocooned in its familiar warmth.

He lets Rose ride out the last of her tears for a few minutes until it peters out into sniffles and whimpers. 

“She made it?” Steve hears a tired voice from behind him, and he snaps his head around to see Natasha with a small, almost delirious smile on her face. Her eyes remained closed, but her head was turned slightly towards them. “I can hear her.”

“Nat?” Steve walks towards her, holding Rose tight when she squirms slightly. “Nat, I got her.”

“Let me hold her,” Natasha carries on, her voice clearly fatigued. A beat passes, then Rose lets out a soft sound before a serene look crosses her face. “You’re so beautiful.”

Steve realizes suddenly that Rose’s cries seemed to have trigged memories of her delivery, and he’s extremely grateful that it was only the three of them in the room. When the Rose in his arms quiets down, curiosity over her mother’s babbling winning over, Natasha frowns slightly.

_“Ya tebya lyublyu, malen’kaya Roza._ Say hello to your Papa for me.”

“Nat,” Steve reaches for her hand, squeezing it firmly. “It’s Steve, you’re at the compound. We finished the op, you led us right to them. I have Rosie with me too, she’s been waiting to see you. C’mon, Nat.”

Steve’s not sure if minutes or hours have passed, but when he feels Natasha squeezing his hand back, he sits up straighter in his chair, watching her scrunch her eyebrows together as she navigates through the brain fog.

“Hmm,” Natasha groans, turning her head to the side as her eyes attempt to focus to the light. “Rosie...”

“She’s right here,” Steve assures her, encouraging Rose to reach forward and circle her hand over two of her fingers. “She’s okay. You’re okay.” 

Steve brings his hand up to smooth her hair down, and Natasha blinks a few more times to see Rose with silent tears trailing down her cheeks as she watches her come to her senses.

“How long?”

“Since last night...you’ve been out for over half a day,” Steve informs her, and when she hears Rose sniffle, Natasha takes as deep breath before attempting to scoot to the side of the bed, wincing as she does.

“Careful,” Steve stands up immediately, setting Rose down on her feet to assist her. Natasha lets out a huff, bringing her hand up to stop him before carrying on with inching sideways, irritated at the fact that she’s trying to catch her breath at the small adjustment.

“Hey, baby,” Natasha exhales, reaching a hand out to her daughter. “Can you lay down next to me?”

Rose looks conflicted for a moment but when she feels herself being lifted up and set down in the spot her mother had freed up for her, she immediately lies on her side with her head resting on the crook between her arm and shoulder. Natasha wraps her arm around her back to pull her closer against her side, her hand resting on her stomach.

“I missed you,” Natasha whispers, pressing her lips against her forehead. Rose moves to snake her arm around her middle but immediately retreats her hand away when she winces at her touch.

“Not there for now,” Natasha says patiently, taking her wrist and guiding it higher so her arm was draped just above her chest. “Shh, baby. You didn’t hurt Mama, it’s okay.”

“Mama,” Rose whimpers, bringing her free hand up to slip her thumb between her lips, her voice trembling along with the rest of her body. “M-mama—,”

“Shh,” Natasha soothes, hushing against the top of Rose’s head while her hand presses firmly on her stomach. Steve reaches over and fixes the blanket that covered her before rubbing small circles on her back, hopeful that it helps in some way.

“F-feel better, Mama?” Rose hiccups, and Natasha brings her other hand up to wipe the tears from her baby’s face. She peers up at Steve and mouths a sincere ‘thank you’ before giving the two most important people in her life a small, tired smile.

“I feel much better now.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose throws a tantrum.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt from Lauren: I would like to see them in more parenting and see Rose temper tantrum and Natasha's reaction.
> 
> I’ve referenced this moment in Chapter 7, so this one’s set before that in the timeline. x

“No! Mama, don’t!”

Natasha sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. She watches her daughter defiantly wrap her blanket around her shoulders in a last minute attempt to keep her from taking it away.

“Rosie,” Natasha tries not to show the exasperation in her voice. “Your blanket just needs a wash. It’ll smell so much nicer when it’s clean.”

Rose considers her words for a brief moment before shaking her head. “No!”

It was almost nearing her bedtime and Natasha knows that it’s a lost cause fighting with a four year old, but eventually figures that she could take it when she’s asleep and put it back before she wakes up.

“Alright,” Natasha raises her hands up in surrender, then changes tactics. “Come on. Let’s get you settled for bed.”

When Rose wakes up in the morning, she instinctively grabs for her blanket but immediately realizes that it doesn’t smell the same. It smells fresher and the stain that had hardened slightly and liked rubbing her fingers against was also gone. Rose frowns intensely, and Natasha catches her throwing it to the ground just as she walks in.

“Mama, my blanket!” Rose wails, kicking her feet in irritation. “I’s different!”

“Calm down, Rosie,” Natasha approaches her, picking the blanket up from the floor. “It’s your blanket, see?”

“Don’t smell the same,” Rose hiccups, rubbing her eyes with balled fists. “M-mama, bring it back. My blanket, Mama...”

Nothing had prepared Natasha for this morning meltdown, but she pushes on after a few calming breaths, laying the blanket out on her bed.

“It’s the same, baby, see the patterns?” Natasha tries, tracing her finger over the wool. “Your blanket just needed a bath, like you do after playing outside.”

“Don’t like bein’ dirty, Mama,” Rose offers feebly, sniffling and shyly grasping the corner of her blanket, fiddling with the frayed edge. “My blanket too?”

“I don’t think your blanket enjoys being dirty as well,” Natasha agrees. Rose leans down and takes another thoughtful sniff at the blanket before crawling towards her mother and burying her nose into her shirt. “You’re like a little puppy, sniffing me.”

“Smells like you,” Rose murmurs, grabbing the blanket with more enthusiasm than before and wrapping it around herself like she usually does.

“Is that alright?”

Rose only nods, putting a corner of the blanket into her mouth. Natasha lets out a small sigh of relief before dropping a kiss on the top of her head and bringing her out to the kitchen for breakfast. She clears her throat at the sight of Steve already starting on the eggs, and he turns around to give the both of them a small smile.

“I heard crying but didn’t want to interfere,” Steve says, dividing his attention between the bundle in Natasha’s arms and the eggs in the pan. Before she could respond, Rose wriggles out of her grasp and pads barefoot towards him, quickly settling her on his hip. “Hey, Rosebud. You good?”

“M-mama wash my blanket when I was ‘sleep,” Rose simplifies. “Sneaky Mama.”

“She sure is,” Steve barks out a laugh, and Natasha couldn’t help but chuckle at her words as well. “You wanna go check if there’s anything else you want for breakfast?”

Steve sets her down without waiting for her response and she makes her way to the fridge, popping her thumb in her mouth after opening it. She scans her options and her eyes land on the cupcakes Wanda had brought over yesterday from a cafe she visited.

“Want those,” Rose mumbles around her thumb, pointing up at the container. Natasha stands up to check on her daughter and sees her on her tiptoes, raising an eyebrow. “Mama, I can’t reach.”

“It’s too early for that,” Natasha shakes her head, pulling out a carton of orange juice instead. “You can have one after lunch.”

Rose pouts but steps away when Natasha closes the fridge, and she carries on sulking even when Steve sets a plate of scrambled eggs and buttered toast in front of her.

“Don’t want this, want cupcake please,” Rose tries again, remembering to use her polite words in hopes of having them cave. She attempts to stand up from her chair to walk back towards the fridge but a stern look from her mother has her sitting back down.

“I said no, Rosie. If you keep this up, you won’t have any at all.”

Steve watches on, seeing how Rose’s face threatens to crumple but to his surprise, immediately morphs into the beginnings of a tantrum.

“Not fair!” Rose shouts, kicking her feet and pushing her plate away. “I want cupcake now!”

“We do not yell, Rose,” Natasha stands up from her seat, dragging her plate back in front of her, setting the spoon and fork down next to it. Rose grabs it disdainfully, grumbling with her eyebrows wrinkled together. “Eat your breakfast. No sweets for the rest of the week.”

At the prospect of not receiving anything at all for such a long stretch of time, she lets out a shrill scream and throws the utensils aimlessly with her eyes wrenched shut. She hears a gasp and a surprised ‘Nat!’ from Steve, and she feels herself being lifted up to stand on her feet.

“Rose, stop it.” At Steve’s no-nonsense voice and the use of her full name, Rose quiets almost immediately. She forces her eyes open and almost bawls at the sight of the fork impaled on the wall and her mother wiping at her thigh, blood seeping through her pajama bottoms. “I want you to apologize right now. You could’ve really hurt her.”

Rose couldn’t tear her gaze away from her thigh, and a gentle shake of her arm brings her back to focus.

“It was an accident,” Natasha interjects, walking towards the pair only for Rose to step back, the blanket falling rumpled on the floor.

“I hurt Mama?” Rose squeaks out in the smallest voice, all traces of her tantrum gone. Steve doesn’t confirm it with words, but when Natasha crouches down to her level and the blood spreads a bit faster, she clenches her fists and runs to her room, loudly slamming the door behind her.

The two adults hear a high-pitched scream from her room, and they both let out deep sighs.

“Should’ve seen this coming, I snuck her blanket last night and she woke up in a funk,” Natasha berates herself, standing up to shuck her pajama pants off to tend to her flesh wound. “That was a close call though. It broke the wall.”

Steve winces at her nonchalant tone, but forces himself to calm himself down.

Rose had managed to become more confident in her choices and expressions, her little personality shining through more and more as months pass. On most days she was a docile, quiet little four year old with a cheeky streak, especially when around her Uncles and Wanda, but on days like these, when the little girl feels overwhelmed and channels that frustration through tantrums, they tend to take it with a grain of salt.

“Come on, you know the drill,” Natasha pulls him from his thoughts, sitting down on the countertop and holding her fist out. They do a quick game of rock paper scissors and Steve loses, earning a victorious smirk from the redhead.

“Avenge my honor. You’ve got this, Daddy,” Natasha lets the last part slip out, earning a wide eyed look from Steve. “I’ll be finishing my breakfast after patching myself up.”

“Da—are you sure?” Steve swallows thickly.

“She doesn’t have to call you that,” Natasha says, her voice a bit lower now. “I’m just saying she sees you like that.”

“That’s alright with you?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Natasha deflects, but Steve moves to stand between her knees, placing his hands on her arms.

“Of course it matters,” Steve murmurs, but Natasha shakes her head.

“I shouldn’t have...can we talk about this later?” Her voice is almost pleading. “Go check on her.” 

Steve obliges, but not before circling her waist and leaning forward to give her a quick kiss. “Later.”

Steve reluctantly pulls away after Natasha wraps her arms around his neck to give him a few more. He knocks on the door to Rose’s room and when he peers inside, he sees her curled up on top of the carpet by her reading nook, seemingly exhausted from her morning tantrum.

“Up we go,” Steve hums, lifting Rose up to her bed so she could sleep more comfortably. She stirs a bit, whining slightly when Steve settles the covers over her.

“Don’t mean it, m’sorry,” Rose cries timidly, her chin threatening to wobble. “Didn’t wanna hurt Mama. Is she angry?”

“She’s not angry, but can you tell me why you felt like throwing a fit even when she promised to give you one after lunch?” Steve starts gently, and Rose looks down, not wanting to meet his eyes.

“I dunno,” Rose mumbles, sniffling slightly. “I dunno. Don’t mean it. Don’t want cupcake ‘nymore.”

Steve sits on the bed and leans on his side, propped up on his elbow. Rose takes this as a cue to lie down as well, snuggling under the duvet and cooing when he tucks her in with his free hand.

“Can I sleep ‘gain?” Rose asks shyly, fighting to keep her drooping eyes open.

“Of course, but Mama will want to talk to you when you wake up, alright?” Steve lets her know, and Rose only nods, already frowning at the idea of it. “Rest easy, sweetheart.”

Steve leans forward to kiss her forehead, waiting until she flutters her eyes closed before moving carefully to walk out of the room. When he turns the knob, Natasha almost stumbles in, having had her ear pressed against the door to hear their conversation.

“Couldn’t help myself,” Natasha whispers, giving him a sheepish smile. He notices that she’s changed into a fresh pair of pants just as she makes her way back to the dining table. “She’s just tired?”

“Yeah, she wanted to sleep in a bit more. Maybe she woke up in the middle of the night? She was really cranky,” Steve thinks out loud, going back to his own seat and taking a few bites from his plate. “I told her you’ll want to see her when she wakes up, though.”

Natasha hums in confirmation. They eat in relative silence for a few moments before Steve pulls them back to their conversation beforehand.

“So. Daddy?” Steve tries to keep his voice light and nonchalant despite his internal excitement. Natasha’s expression tightens before letting out a measured exhale.

“I’m just selfish. It’s just been Mama this and Mama that and I love it,” Natasha admits, looking down at what’s left on her plate. “Just the other night, she asked me if you were her Daddy, like in the storybooks. And then I suddenly felt like I wasn’t enough for her.”

“Nat, you’re her whole world,” Steve was quick to defend, but Natasha gives him a small smile. “What did you tell her?”

Natasha schools his genuinely curious expression, never pressuring, never expecting, and her heart feels a bit lighter.

“I asked her if that was what she wanted,” Natasha supplies, her eyes looks up to meet his.

“And?”

“I couldn’t make out what she said after, she was pretty much half asleep at that point,” Natasha chuckles, and Steve couldn’t help but grin as well. “Anyway. I’ll get over it, if you want her to call you that and vice versa.”

“I’m not going to lie and say that I’m not excited at the idea of her seeing me as her father, but I won’t ask her to call me that until you’re comfortable,” Steve says decidedly after a few beats of silence, and Natasha looks at him with slightly wide eyes.

“You won’t?”

“I’m sure. Rosie and I could both be ready for it but if you’re not, then I won’t push for it yet,” Steve reaches forward to grab her hand, running his thumb over her knuckles. “We’re a team, the three of us. Everyone counts.”

Natasha shakes her head, muttering an ‘unbelievable’ under her breath before mirroring his easy smile.

“Everyone counts.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha brings Rose to the farmhouse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! If you haven't noticed, I like jumping in between timelines. Hope it's not too confusing to anyone. Enjoy!

Just a week after Rose’s official adoption, Natasha had told Clint that she wanted her to meet the rest of her extended family, hence why they were already landing on the secluded patch of land leading up to the familiar farmhouse she had grown to know as her home away from the compound.

Rose looks around at the greenery that surrounded her with a bit of trepidation but mostly awe—she’s only seen landscapes like these in pictures her Mama had shown her and she quickly tugs on her hand, pointing an animal she spots in the corner of her eye.

“Cow,” Rose says in a small, almost reverent whisper, and she receives a chuckle from above. “Cow goes moo.”

“That’s right, smart girl.”

It was not only Rose’s first time at the farmhouse, but also the first time they had gone past the security of the compound and as they approach the short flight of stairs leading up to the patio, she stops short by the foot of it, Natasha following suit.

“What’s wrong?” Natasha asks, and Clint takes this moment to grab the duffel slung over her shoulder to bring it inside while she tends to her daughter. “Come on, foot up.”

Natasha realizes only now that she was used to the elevator at the compound, and wasn’t allowed to roam too far around the premises. She wouldn’t put it past her when she thinks that she probably haven’t had to scale up or down a staircase in her short life.

Rose dallies a bit, holding tightly onto her hand as she brings a wobbly foot up to the first step. Natasha is patient as they move at snail’s pace up the steps, her staying behind her as she holds both her hands for support, reminding her of when Cooper or Lila needed the same amount of assistance when they were still learning how to walk.

When they finally make it up to the porch, Natasha lifts her up in her arms and presses a resounding kiss to her flushed cheek.

“Good job, baby,” Natasha praises just as Laura opens the door and comes out to meet them, slight surprise in her eyes but it disappears as quickly as it came. Rose quickly hides her face into her mother’s neck at the unfamiliar face. “Laura, hi, it’s been a while.”

“I can see why,” Laura smiles, her eyes darting down to the little girl in her friend’s arms. “I’m going to give Clint an earful for not telling me, he just said you’ll be coming with someone. I could’ve prepared better.”

“I meant to call, things just got busy,” Natasha simplifies, but Laura just waves her hand and it’s all water under the bridge, as easy as that. “I’d like you to meet my daughter, Rosie. Baby, you want to say hi to Auntie Laura?”

Laura lets out a small, happy gasp at her words, and Natasha could barely contain her own smile at being able to introduce the little girl as hers. Rose peeks up through her lashes and finds the woman in question giving her a friendly look.

“I’m so glad to meet you,” Laura greets warmly, not moving forward to touch or using a grating baby voice she knows Natasha hates. “Your mommy’s a really good friend of mine.”

Rose taps Natasha’s clavicle and she turns her head slightly down to listen to her.

“Really?” Rose whispers, and Natasha confirms at the same volume before looking back at Laura with a bit more confidence even though the arm wound around her mother’s neck says otherwise. “H-hi.”

“Hi, honey,” Laura grins at the small acknowledgement before looking back up at Natasha. “She’s just a little angel. Come on, let’s go inside.”

The minute they step in, Cooper and Lila’s head shoot up with wide grins, the former giving his favorite aunt an enthusiastic wave from where he was sitting on the couch while the latter barrels towards her as she yells out her name, only stopping a few steps away at Laura’s pointed look when she notices Rose tense up in her arms.

“Lila, this is Auntie Nat’s daughter, Rosie,” Laura introduces them, and Lila’s eyes slightly widen. Natasha squats down to her level and opens up an arm, and she willingly moves into her side, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

“Hi Auntie Nat. Hi Rosie,” Lila reaches over to touch her arm, and Rose visibly flinches at the surprise contact. “Sorry!”

“She’s still getting used to everything so she’s a bit jumpy,” Natasha informs her when she spots the small pout that forms on her lips. “Maybe later when she’s feeling up to it, you two can play together?”

Lila brightens at the prospect of a new playmate that wasn’t her brother, and she nods eagerly before scuttling back off to the living room.

“Hey, shh, it’s alright,” Natasha feels her daughter trembling in her hold, her breathing starting to hitch with little whimpers muffled against her neck. "Mama's got you, it's okay."

"Is she alright?" Laura frowns, catching Clint come down from the stairs from the corner of her eye but her focus mainly on the little girl terrified out of her mind, trying to make herself smaller than she already is.

"I think she's just overwhelmed, I'll see if I can get her calmed down in the room," Natasha feels Rose shaking a bit more violently now, and she presses her closer to her when she feels warm tears dripping down her neck. "Oh, baby, it's okay. Shh, c'mon. Let's get you settled."

Natasha wastes no time in bringing her up the stairs, and as soon as they hear the door close, Laura grabs Clint’s wrist and drags him back outside.

“Why did you think this was something to keep from me?” Laura asks hotly, though her voice sounded more upset than angry. “I prepared for an extra guest, not a new cousin.”

“Nat wanted to tell you herself and I was just respecting that,” Clint defends, reaching to hold her arms. “Rosie’s only been staying with us for a few months and adoption went through just last week. You were the first one she wanted her to meet apart from the team.”

“She seems painfully shy,” Laura frowns, recalling earlier’s events. “That poor thing was shaking like a leaf.”

“Nat rescued her,” Clint supplies, careful to leave out definitive details. “She was in really bad shape when we pulled her out and she’s still adjusting, learns new things everyday. This is the first time she’s been out.”

“And she wanted to bring her here?”

“Like I said, Nat wanted her to meet the rest of the family,” Clint shrugs, then half-smiles. “Plus it’s fresh air and lots of space to run around. Kid’s been cooped up, the change of scene might do her some good.”

“How old is she?”

“Three, almost four?” Laura frowns at Clint’s rough estimation.

“Almost four? She’s just about Lila’s size when she was just turning three,” Laura tuts, crossing her arms over her chest. “You sure she’s being fed properly there?”

“Laur, that’s already her rounded out, you don’t want to see what she looked like when we first got her,” Clint’s voice gets rough at the memory, shaking his head to clear it a bit. “And kid eats fast no matter how much Nat tries to get her to slow down.”

“Probably still scared that it might get taken from her,” Laura knows Clint’s history and quickly realizes that he understands more than he lets on. “Is there anything else I need to know?”

“She’s great back at the compound, but the first few days every little thing sets her off,” Clint gives her a somber look before leaning forward to press his lips to her forehead. “You can talk to Nat about it, though. She can answer that question better than I can.”

“How is she, by the way?” Laura asks, sighing softly.

“She’s so much happier, Laur, she looks at that kid like she’s given her the moon,” Clint chuckles, pulling his wife close. “If you think Nat’s great with our kids, she’s absolutely wonderful with Rosie.”

“I have no doubt,” Laura returns his easy smile before leading him back inside.

It’s hours later when Natasha comes back downstairs with Rose in her arms, and Laura makes sure to tell her children to keep their voices down and to not crowd the little girl. They manage to hold on to their end of the deal when Natasha sits down by the dining table without much ceremony.

“Is that the little traitor?” Natasha asks teasingly, her eyes trained on the bundle that was attached to Laura by a sling across her chest. “Five months, correct?”

“Six in a week,” Laura nods, busying herself around the kitchen as she preps for dinner. “Does she have any allergies?”

“Nope, she’ll eat anything,” Natasha notes, then her eyes gleam with a bit of hope. “Do you think you could make the—,”

“I went to the market this morning to get stuff for your casserole,” Laura cuts her off, earning a large grin from the woman across the room. “Also just finished a cherry pie while you were upstairs.”

“You’re the best,” Natasha bounces Rose slightly on her lap. “You hear that, Rosie? Auntie Laura’s making all of Mama’s favorites. I can’t wait for you to try them.”

Rose isn’t paying much attention, her head turned to where Lila was playing with a mess of toys on the floor. She wants to go and see what else she was doing, but she also doesn’t want to be away from her mother despite her early reassurances that they were alright here.

“Do you want to play, Rosie?” Laura’s eyes flicker to Rose and couldn't help but frown when she sees the little girl jump and snap her head back, as if she had been caught doing something she wasn't supposed to. "You can if you'd like. I'm sure Lila would love the company."

Rose looks tentatively between her and the living room, and Natasha squeezes her hand in reassurance.

"Go. I'll just be here in the kitchen if you need me," Natasha whispers, and Rose takes a deep breath before sliding down from her lap and quietly making her way towards Lila, her little hands balled into tight fists by her sides.

Lila turns her head at the sound of light footsteps and grins when she sees Rose walking closer. Her mom had told her to be gentle with Auntie Nat's baby, almost like she should be with Nate, and she tries her best to make sure she feels welcome.

"Hi Rosie," Lila greets, undeterred by Rose's tense demeanor as she holds out a plush doll. "I was gonna play fairy tea party, do you wanna join me?"

Rose looks at the doll apprehensively, then at Lila and notices that she had a pink glittery tutu on and a tiara on top of her normal clothes. Before she could comprehend what was happening, Lila was already diving into her toy chest for another tiara and a pair of fairy wings.

"I don't have another skirt but you can have the wings," Lila offers, holding it out to her. When Rose moves to take it in her hands, she simply stares and rubs the stretched tulle between her fingers. "Is that okay?"

Rose manages a nod before looking back at her mother in the kitchen who had been watching her all this time, giving her an encouraging smile and a small wave when she meets her gaze.

"Here, like this," Lila helps Rose loop the garter around her arms when she notices Rose not doing it herself, and she situates the tiara over her head, grinning as she steps back to admire her handiwork. "Perfect! Come on, let's gather the stuff."

"Cups?" Rose mentions quietly as she kneels in front of the coffee table, and Lila pushes the toy chest towards her.

"Yeah, we need cups! Also saucers and a teapot, it's all in there," Lila allows her to grab everything from the chest. "I'll bring the guests, be right back."

Rose tenses again at the prospect of more people, but when she sees her place a stuffed hawk next to her, she visibly relaxes and even smiles as she sets the plastic cups and plates out on the table.

In the kitchen, Nathanial makes his presence known and Laura steps away from the chopping board and rinses her hands first before lifting him out of the sling and close to her chest.

"He alright?" Natasha asks, already standing up from her spot. "I can take him."

"Just needs a new diaper," Laura informs her as she transfers him into her arms. "You can change him in our room."

"Got it," Natasha holds the fussy baby close to her as she makes her way up the stairs, making quick work of changing his soiled diaper as well as putting him in new onesie before heading back down, settling on the couch in the living room instead.

"Give me back my kid, Romanoff," Laura hollers from the kitchen. "You have your own."

Natasha feels warmth bloom in her chest at those words.

"Two and two is fair play," Natasha shoots back, earning a hearty laugh from the woman standing by the stove. Natasha looks down and sees baby Nate wriggling slightly in her hold, aimlessly reaching out for a lock of hair to pull. She scrunches her nose at him and he rewards her with a gummy, open mouthed smile. "Aren't you a charmer."

At Natasha's cooing, Rose momentarily pulls away from playing make believe and steps close towards her mother, looking down at the baby with curious eyes.

"Baby," Rose pronounces it as bee-bee, and she brings a finger up to trace it lightly over Nathaniel's cheek but the impossibly small hand catches it, circling around her finger instead. "Mama, look!"

"He likes you, Rosie," Natasha smiles, leaning forward to press a kiss on her forehead. "And can I just say, you make a darling fairy princess."

Rose blushes at the compliment. "Thank you, Mama."

Rose shuffles in between saying hi again and again to Nathaniel and making sure she and Lila were keeping their stuffed guests happy with the magic butterfly tea and imaginary rainbow cookies, and Natasha notices her coming out of her shell a bit more, interjecting every once in a while to compliment Mr. Alligator's manners or offer Mademoiselle Fluffington another cup of tea.

When Laura calls them for dinner, Lila grabs Rose's hand and was about to pull her to the kitchen until she feels resistance.

"Clean up?" Rose asks tentatively, looking at the toys they've scattered around the table and on the living room floor.

"I still wanna play after we eat so we can just leave it there for now," Lila shrugs. "Do you?"

"Yeah," Rose doesn't hesitate to answer.

"Then it's okay. Now come on, I'm hungry and I wanna sit next to you."

Rose allows herself to get dragged by Lila towards the table, and they settle next to each other, two pairs of feet kicking back and forth.

"Looks like we've got royalty dining tonight, Laur," Clint notices the little tiaras, and grins at the sight of Rose in a pair of fairy wings.

"Indeed we do," Laura plays along as she takes Nathaniel out of his godmother's arms, shaking her head at how they giggle to themselves.

Natasha sits next to her daughter on the table and puts a little bit of everything on her plate, explaining to her what each of them were first before letting her eat on her own. As Rose takes a bite of the casserole, she makes a hum of contentment before proceeding to shovel more into her mouth, much to Laura's amusement but Natasha's worry.

"Slow down," Natasha reminds her firmly, and Rose only straightens up in her seat before eating at a still fast but more acceptable pace.

A few minutes later, Rose looks down at her now empty plate, hesitant to ask for more but not entirely sure how. Just at that moment, her new friend had asked for the same thing and Laura simply dishes out another helping before turning towards her.

"Would you like some more?" Laura offers, and Rose's eyes flicker to her mother who gives her an immediate nod mid-chew.

"Yes, please," Rose squeaks out, smiling slightly when she gives her a larger helping than her first one.

They have dessert and play a bit more in the living room before the adults have decided that it was time to get ready for bed. Natasha lets Rose practice walking up a few steps before picking her up and giving her a bath in the room that was as good as hers whenever she visits, and she dresses her in a light sleep dress before doing her own night routine and settling next to her daughter on the bed.

“How’d you like today?” Natasha asks, lying on her side and propped up on her elbow. Rose is bundled underneath the covers, her body facing her mother. “Did you have fun?”

Rose only nods, attempting to shuffle closer. Natasha scoots forward and Rose makes a pleased sound before burying her face in her chest.

“I like playing with Lila, she’s my friend,” Rose mumbles into her skin, pulling her arm out from under the covers to play with the neckline of Natasha’s shirt. “I like baby too. Can we get one, Mama?”

Natasha doesn’t know if she should laugh or cry.

“It’s not that simple,” Natasha chuckles, brushing her hair away from her forehead. “But we’ll be here for a few days so you’ll get to see more of him.”

“Can’t bring him home?” Rose tries again, and Natasha sighs before leaning down to kiss her temple.

“I’m afraid we can’t. Plus, he’s Auntie Laura’s and Clint’s baby, I’m sure they’d be sad if we took him away,” Natasha settles with that, bringing her arm around her back to gently scratch her nails over the fabric of her dress. “I know I would if someone took you from me.”

Rose looks up to meet her gaze, mildly surprised at her words.

“Won’t go ‘nywhere, Mama,” Rose reassures her with all the seriousness she could muster, and Natasha only smiles. “Don’t want you to be sad.”

“That makes me feel so much better,” Natasha peppers her face with kisses, earning a few giggles from the little girl. “You better get some rest. Tomorrow Auntie Laura’s planning on letting you help collect eggs for breakfast.”

“From fridge?”

Natasha bites back a laugh. “No, baby, from chickens.”

“Oh,” Rose snuffles a bit, suddenly shy now. “Can’t sleep, Mama.”

“Do you want a story?”

Rose nods, then presses her nose to her neck. “An’ mil’?”

“Ah,” Natasha collects her daughter in her arms, grabbing her security blanket and the bottle she’s packed just in case before padding quietly downstairs. “Let’s see what we can do.”

Natasha had stayed in the Barton house enough times that she knows where everything is placed, and not long after she situates herself on the rocking chair by the window in the living room, making sure that her daughter was properly bundled in her blanket before she slips the nipple between her lips.

“You see the sky? All the stars are out tonight,” Natasha whispers, rocking the both of them gently enough so as not to jostle the bottle in her hand too much. Rose’s eyes look out the window, her head resting heavily against her mother’s chest. “And on the brightest one you see, there lived little Zvezda.”

Natasha makes the story up as she goes, noticing how quickly Rose drifts off to sleep at the soothing motions of the rocking chair and the warm milk in her belly. She hears a creak from behind and she forces herself not to throw the lamp by her side.

“She out?” Laura’s voice calls out quietly from the couch, close enough to see but far enough to not intrude the intimacy of the moment.

“Like a light,” Natasha confirms, pulling the bottle away and settling it on the windowsill. Her rocking doesn’t cease, nor does the hand patting her bum over the thick blanket. “I remember helping you put Lila to sleep in this spot. Seems like it still works like a charm.”

“I’d say it’s the starry night, but really I think it’s just you,” Laura smiles. “I never could get Lila to sleep as fast as you did.”

They were quiet for a while, save for some coos from Rose and the chirping crickets outside.

“Never imagined I’d be doing this with my own,” Natasha confesses, looking out into the vastness of the dark purple sky. “I hold her and it makes me feel so needed, but I’m also constantly afraid that I’m doing something wrong.”

“Welcome to the joys of parenthood,” Mirth gleams behind her eyes, but eases her teasing when she sees her friend look down at her daughter with a tenderness she recognizes in herself. “But if you’d like my advice, the fact that you’re worried about doing something wrong means you’re doing everything right.”

Laura’s always thought that Natasha would be a good mother, and there was no further proof than what she was witnessing in front of her.

“You’ll be just fine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A handful of you have sent some really wonderful ideas and I'm looking forward to exploring those further in this 'verse. Feel free to keep sending more in, I love reading them! (I've also been doing a very poor job at responding, and I promise I'll be better about that this time around).
> 
> As usual, feedback is greatly appreciated and I thoroughly enjoy seeing your thoughts and comments on the chapter/s! Sending lots of love. x


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose changes the entire family dynamic with a single word.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I feel like this one's been a long time coming. I've also taken a few elements from several of your prompts, hope that's alright. x
> 
> Enjoy!

It all started when Steve charged headfirst into the hoard without his shield.

He had thrown it to clear a few of the attackers in his line of sight and now it was being trampled, forcing him to jump into combat on his way to retrieve it. The rest of the team were holding their own, and he was just a few more meters away from reaching it until he feels a sharp pain shoot through his back, impaling him with enough force to lift him off his feet before it swiftly pulls out of him, sending him quickly crumpling to the floor.

“Cap’s down!” Natasha hears through the comms, and she finishes off a droid with a swift kick before scanning the area and running in his general direction.

As soon as they get back to the compound, the team rushes him to the medbay and immediately preps him for emergency blood transfusion and tissue regeneration. His serum was working to keep him alive, but even after a successful patch up, he remained in a comatose state for the next three three days.

Natasha had never seen Steve get injured this severely before, and with their current relationship, she was naturally pissed that he had essentially ran into an instant kill zone without second thought and exhibited the lack of self-preservation that she knows had been there since the day she met him.

Apart from that, she also can’t help but feel more anxious about his recovery than she usually would, not just for her but for the little girl who had grown nearly as attached to him as she was to her. Rose had become quiet the first night she learns about Steve’s current state, and had refused to say another word in the days that followed.

On the fourth day, Natasha brings Rose back to the medbay to visit Steve and sits on the stool next to him with her on her lap. She sees that he's still unresponsive, scanning the exposed skin and was glad to note that the bruises and minor cuts have already begun to fade.

“You wanna talk to him? Maybe that’ll make him wake up,” Natasha murmurs near the shell of Rose’s ear, and she simply stares at his unmoving form, reaching to touch his arm but instantly recoils when she hears a knock on the door.

“It’s okay,” Natasha soothes her when she jumps. She looks up and sees Bucky and Wanda shuffle inside with a few paper bags in hand.

“Friday said you’d be here, so we brought breakfast,” Wanda informs them, moving forward to greet Rose properly. “Hi, malyshka. Good morning.”

Wanda gingerly takes her from Natasha’s grasp, and she’s mildly surprised that she doesn’t put up much of a fight.

“Stevie’s still sleeping, huh,” Bucky comments, putting the paper bags down on the bedside table. “He’s taking longer than I thought.”

“You try having something go through you,” Wanda retorts, but Rose whimpers at her words and she immediately regrets them. “I’m sorry. You didn’t hear that.”

“Try not to further scare my child,” Natasha gives Wanda a warning look and she recoils under her gaze. “Cho said yesterday that his vitals are improving by the hour. He could probably hear us, can’t just respond yet.”

“You hear me, punk?” Bucky says near his ear, genuine concern behind his teasing. “Wiggle a finger or somethin’.”

“Baby, could you go with Wanda to get me a coffee?” Natasha looks at Rose, briefly glancing at the two other people in the room and they immediately catch her drift. “If you ask nicely, Bucky might get you a muffin.”

“Bucky will get you five muffins,” Bucky huffs, cocking his head towards the door. “C’mon, doll.”

He lets Wanda and Rose step out of the room first before giving Natasha a nod and following them out.

Steve and Natasha were left in the room, only the sounds of the beeping monitors surrounding them.

“That was a real idiot move, Rogers,” Natasha starts, wanting to smack his chest and push him like she usually would. Instead, she reaches forward and takes his hand in hers. “What were you thinking?”

Natasha frowns when his face stays serene, and takes a deep breath before carrying on.

“Rosie hasn’t been talking again, not since you went under,” Natasha confesses, her throat closing up. “She’s taken to bringing one of your shirts around instead of her blanket. Do you know how heartbreaking that looks?”

Natasha thinks she sees his finger twitch, but she hasn’t been sleeping well. She must’ve imagined it.

“You can’t leave, okay? You promised to help me with Rosie. She misses you, Steve, and I...I miss you, too,” N lets out a shuddering breath as she tightens her hold, cursing how her eyes brim with tears. “We need you back so you better pull yourself out of this or else I’ll knock you out myself.”

Natasha wrenches her eyes shut, bringing his hand up near her face and clasping it between both of hers.

“S’that a threat?” She hears a low husk from her side, and she snaps her eyes open to see Steve’s eyebrows furrowing. “M’awake. No need for that.”

“Steve,” Natasha chokes out a strangled laugh, waiting for his eyes to flutter open before leaning up to press a chaste kiss on his lips. “Don’t you ever do that again. I’m serious.”

“Get impaled by an industrial weapon? Yes, ma’am.”

Wanda and Bucky come back a short while later with Rose in tow, seemingly pacified with both hands around a half-finished chocolate muffin.

“Yummy?” Natasha crouches down to her daughter’s level and she nods, mashing her face to take a large bite from the top as if to prove her point. “Charming, Rosie.”

“She’s here?” Steve calls from the bed, and Rose gasps at the sound of his voice, her eyes comically wide with chocolate smeared around her cheeks. “Rosebud, where are you?”

Rose nearly drops her muffin in excitement until Wanda takes it from her. She flaps her hands impatiently while Natasha wipes her face, and as soon as she’s done, she takes off to the side of the hospital bed, standing on her tiptoes to pull on the sheets draped over him.

“There you are, sweetheart,” Steve gives her a bright, albeit tired smile, and she reaches her arms up, trying to hook her leg up the bed and looking back at her mother for help. Natasha walks over and picks her up, and without warning, Steve grabs her and allows her to lie over his chest, settling back against the pillows with a slight grunt.

“Your stomach—,”

“I need her close,” Steve says, as if that was a perfectly good excuse, bringing his hands over her back and resting them there. “Hey, Rosie. Missed me?”

Rose snuffles a bit, burrowing her nose against his neck and whispers her first word in days.

“Daddy.”

Despite it being an intimate moment, everyone in the room catches it—Wanda and Bucky have massive grins on their faces, while Natasha and Steve visibly freeze at the monicker. Steve looks up at Natasha with a slightly worried look, ready to defend himself, but he simply sees a gentle smile on her lips, leaning forward to put her hand over his behind Rose’s back.

“That’s right, baby. Daddy’s awake,” Natasha’s confirmation isn’t any louder than Rose’s voice, but she gives Steve a look with as much certainty as she can muster to further seal the deal. His face visibly relaxes before holding Rose impossibly tighter against him, brushing a kiss over the top of her head.

“It’s okay, Rosie,” Steve murmurs into her hair when he hears a soft whimper. “Daddy’s got you.”

Steve gets discharged a few days later, managing to walk out of the medbay as if he hadn’t been fully unconscious for the better part of the week.

“You scared me back there,” Natasha admits, her head propped up on her elbow. She had managed to persuade Steve into staying on her floor that night, wanting to have him close after the whole ordeal. “You better make it up to me.”

“Is that so?”

“Mmhmm,” Natasha smirks, hooking her leg over his and sitting on his lap. “I’ve got a few ideas.”

“Pray tell,” Steve plays along, circling his hands behind her back and pulling her closer, and she quickly wraps her arms around his neck.

“Why don’t I show you instead?”

Just as soon as Natasha works her shirt off and tosses it to the side, they hear a tentative but familiar knock on the door.

Natasha groans softly as she presses her forehead into his shoulder, smacking his chest when she feels his body shaking with muffled laughter.

“Someone else needs life-affirming, I think,” Steve chuckles, and Natasha shakes her head, rushing to put her shirt back on when she hears another, more frantic knock, and opens to door to a weeping Rose.

“What happened, baby?” Natasha frowns, crouching down to pull her into a hug.

“Bad dream,” Rose whimpers feebly, one of Steve’s shirts trailing on the floor behind her. “I s-stay with you, Mama. Please?”

Rose has never slept in between Steve and Natasha before, always just either of the two, and Natasha gives him a quick glance. Rose follows her gaze and straightens up a bit, clutching the shirt a bit tighter now.

“What did you dream about, hmm?” Natasha asks, taking her hand and settling her down in between her and Steve, who had already scooted to the other end of the bed. In an instant, Rose takes Steve’s hand and places it over her stomach, sighing slightly at the contact.

“Y-you and daddy leaved but didn’t come back,” Rose sniffles, and Natasha lies on her side as she pulls the covers over the three of them before bringing her hand up to wipe her tears away. “An’ I was ‘lone an’ bad people take me again. Hurt me lots, Mama. Was so scary.”

“That does sound scary, baby,” Natasha nods, and Steve rubs his thumb back and forth over her stomach. “But you’re safe here, and you know we try our best to make sure to come back to you at the end of the day.”

“Daddy ‘lmost didn’t,” Rose protests, and Steve tries not to look hurt at the implication of her words.

“But I did, and that’s the important thing,” Steve brings his hand up to help wipe her tears that were falling too fast. “Calm down, Rosie. It’s alright, we’re not going anywhere.”

The two adults let Rose ride out the last of her tears, and Rose turns on her side to press her wet face into Steve’s chest.

“Do you think you can try to sleep again?” Natasha asks, gently rubbing her back, and she sees her nod against the fabric of his shirt, no doubt wiping her nose on it too. She bites back a smirk.

“I stay here? S’okay?”

“Yeah, you can sleep here for tonight,” Steve answers for the both of them, his gaze drifting up to Natasha before holding the little girl close. “Rest easy, sweetheart.”

“Good night, baby,” Natasha follows up, kissing the back of her head. She waits for her breathing to even out, whispering a few more soothing words to coax her into a deeper sleep before lying her head back down on the pillow. “She’s been sleeping here with me for the past week. I need to get her used to staying in her room but I think she needed the extra reassurance that you’re alive.”

“The nightmares...that’s been happening a lot lately too?”

“She wouldn’t tell me,” Natasha shrugs, a humorless smile on her lips as she makes herself more comfortable, cuddling closer to her daughter. “Sorry for cutting us short.”

“I’ll manage,” Steve chuckles, and they hear Rose coo at the warmth she feels from both sides. “Good night, Nat.”

“Night,” Natasha whispers back. “I’m really glad you’re not dead.”

Steve holds back a laugh in fear of waking the little girl sleeping in between them.

“Me too.”

Steve was placed under unofficial house arrest by the rest of the team after the recent family development, and usually he would be annoyed by the restriction, but he doesn’t seem to mind this time around, especially when Rose had taken to following him around like a little duckling as if making sure he wouldn’t disappear on her like that again.

She stays with him as much as she can—when he draws, perfectly content with watching him make pictures appear on the page with her back pressed against his front, during mealtimes, and asking him to stay with her as she takes her afternoon nap.

Natasha tries to not let it bother her, but her insecurities from their first conversation about him taking in a much larger, father-figure role has her stomach twisting in knots. She tries to entice her with promises of dessert or a day out at the planetarium, make her appear like the better parent, but Rose is relentless with her current devotion, not wanting to go out “unless Daddy can go too”.

Rose’s preference for Steve carries on for another few weeks, breaking Natasha’s heart a little bit more with each day that passes, until Steve gets called for another mission and she sees her opportunity to jump in.

“Rosie, it’ll just be a few days,” Steve tries to calm her down, but Rose isn’t having any of it, crying loudly with his shirt in a vice grip.

“That’s what you said b’fore an’ you were ‘sleep for a long time!” Rose wails out in between hiccups. “Daddy, don’t go.”

Natasha steps in, seemingly unaware of their previous conversation, and places a hand on Rose's back.

"Baby,—"

"Mama, tell Daddy not to go, please!" Rose's voice seemed panicked now, and Natasha throws her personal agenda aside at how distressed she appears to be. "Don't want Daddy to be hurt 'gain."

Natasha quickly realizes that apart from genuinely missing him, Rose's fast attachment had stemmed from seeing him in a near lifeless state for days, and was simply trying to make sure that he wasn't dying under her watchful eye.

"I'm staying here with you, Rosie, and Bucky will make sure that they get home safe," Natasha reassures, plucking her from his grasp and sighs in relief when she doesn't wriggle to go back to Steve. She’s forgotten how much she’s missed her steady weight in her arms. "Shh, I know, baby. I know."

Natasha sways the both of them slightly and lets her cry into her chest for a while longer until she feels her breathing even out, eventually slumping against her. She frowns when she brings her hand to her back, tutting at how she had cried hard enough to work her up into a sweat.

"I don’t know how you manage this, Nat,” Steve's voice is tight, his eyes trained on Rose. “I don’t want to leave her.”

"It never gets easier," Natasha rubs Rose's back a bit before placing her back into his arms. “But we have to, and we just need to keep coming back home to reassure her that we keep the promises we make.”

When Steve comes back a few days later as promised, Rose welcomes him with open arms, not letting him go or out of her sight for even just a moment.

The evening of his return, Rose pads up to Natasha who was tidying things up in the living room with her thumb in her mouth.

"Mama, mil' please," Rose tugs on her mother's shirt, and follows this up with a shy request. "Can Daddy hol'?"

Natasha pushes the little green monster down and crouches to Rose's level, cupping her cheek.

"Alright," Natasha relents. "As long as I get you hold you while I make it. I've missed you, you know."

Rose shuffles forward and wraps her arms around her neck immediately, pressing a loud kiss to her cheek.

"Sorry, Mama," Rose looks thoroughly guilty. "Love you, always always."

Natasha only shakes her head as she walks to the kitchen with her daughter securely in her arms, kissing her cheek in return. "Nothing to be sorry for."

She gives the bottle a light shake before heading to her bedroom and sees Steve reading on the bed, his back propped up against the headboard.

"I'll swap your book for a Rose," Natasha says from her place by the doorframe and Steve looks up, smiling at the sight of Rose with her blanket over her head as a makeshift hood, little wisps of hair peeking through.

"You drive a hard bargain, but I accept," Steve sets his book aside just as Natasha plops Rose down on his lap, situating her sideways. While she was making herself comfortable, his eyes widen slightly when she hands him the bottle.

"No, Nat, this is your thing with her, I don't..." Steve argues lightly, but Natasha only encourages him to wrap his arm around Rose before firmly pushing the bottle into his free hand.

Natasha hates that it had taken her so long to realize that her daughter was simply learning how to trust him the way she did the first few months she had been staying with them, and mentally berates herself for even attempting to compete for her daughter's attention in the first place.

"She asked for you, and it’s okay, really,” Natasha gives him a genuine smile, brushing the hair that falls on Rose's forehead as she suckles lazily. "It took a while for me to come to terms with it, but I think we're in a good place.”

"Yeah?”

"Knowing that I’m her first favorite made me feel a lot better.”

"I bet it did,” Steve laughs quietly, looking down at Rose who was slipping in and out of sleep. “She's still so little. It feels like she hadn't grown an inch the past year.”

"She hasn’t,” Natasha confirms. “I had Cho and Bruce look into it. Her serum was administered early and stunted her physical aging. Not sure if that’s a good thing.”

Steve looks down at her—their daughter, and figures that it didn't really matter that much. She was perfect and healthy and he also had Natasha, who had opened her heart to him, and there really wasn't much else he could complain about.

"Who knows," Steve settles with that. "I guess we'll just have to see for ourselves.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay we've finally got Daddy Steve! Lemme know what you think with a lil review down below, they truly make my day. x


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha had always prided in the fact that she had never lost control around her daughter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! I see all your fluff prompts and I love your ideas, I'll try my best to get to them when I can! In the meantime, have a bit of angst.
> 
> Enjoy x

Natasha had always prided in the fact that she had never lost control around her daughter.

After almost a year of raising Rose, nine months since she was officially and legally hers, not once has she raised her voice, patient and unwavering even when she’s frustrated and near the end of her tether. She tries her best to make herself a safe haven for her, giving in to her needs and indulging her every once in a while, wanting her to feel secure enough that she knows in her heart that she would never be in harm’s way, as long as she’s around.

When Natasha comes home from a week-long mission that had went sideways, she can’t seem to shake the haunted feeling that clung to her bones despite having experienced this more times than she could count. Her agitation was near palpable but she had tried her best to compartmentalize her thoughts and attempts to focus on simply being home.

She is safe, her family is safe, and that’s all she wants.

After months of being together, Steve is getting better at reading Natasha’s tells, and when he notices her trying to mask her jumping from when he approaches her from behind, he drops a quick kiss to her shoulder.

“Do you want me to stay here tonight?” Steve hums, feeling Natasha slightly to relax against him. “I know I usually do, but I just thought I’d give you the option.”

“If that’s alright,” Natasha responds quietly, leaning her head back against his shoulder for a short moment, kissing under his jaw before stepping away. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“I’ll take care of breakfast,” Steve promises, going into Rose’s room to say goodnight before making his way to his own living quarters, giving her the space she asked for to recuperate.

Rose had felt that something was off with her Mama when she got back—she didn’t smile as big as she usually does and didn’t carry her around everywhere like she usually would. She had resolved to make her feel better, just as she always does with her, so later on in the middle of the night, she pads down the short distance between hers and Natasha’s room with blanket in tow.

At the light sound of the knob turning, Natasha’s eyes snap open from a restless sleep, slightly unaware of anything else. She swiftly pulls the gun from under her pillow and aims it directly at the door, her index already poised on the trigger and reflexively shoots at a higher angle as a warning shot.

She hears a piercing scream and she shakes her head to clear the fog in her brain, blinking rapidly to take stock of the room she’s in—she’s back at the compound, she’s in her own bed, and her eyes trail down and gasps in horror when she sees her daughter with her hands covering her ears, hunched down over herself on the floor.

“Rosie!” Natasha yells out, dropping her weapon on the bed and all but rushes towards her daughter, but she flinches violently as soon as her hands touch her in an effort to lift her up. “I’m sorry, I—,”

“Don’t hurt me,” Rose struggles out, trying to turtle into herself even further. “Bad!”

“Baby,” Natasha feels herself choking at her words. “Baby, Mama’s not going to hurt you. I’m—,”

“Bad, don’t wan’ you! Wan’ Daddy,” Rose cries out, falling to her side and curling up into a fetal position, her hands still over her ears and her eyes wrenched tight. Her entire body trembles, and when Natasha reaches out to touch her again, she squirms away as if trying to escape her hold.

Steve’s footsteps can be heard frantically pounding outside the hall, no doubt alerted by FRIDAY, and he surveys the room before fully stepping inside—he sees the bullet hole through the door by his eye level first, then the gun thrown haphazardly across the bed, and finally the crying child on the floor. He sees Natasha right next to her, and he quickly puts two and two together, kneeling down in front of her first to confirm his suspicions.

“Nat? Are you with me?”

“I didn’t think—we got ambushed and got our covers blown so many times…” Natasha was mumbling, her face stoic but she has a faraway look in her glassy eyes. “If I had shot any lower…”

“You didn’t hurt her,” Steve reassures her after giving Rose a quick once over, frowning at her still shaking form.

“I aimed the gun at her direction,” Natasha’s voice hitches. “She saw me, Steve.”

“Daddy,” Rose cries out in a hoarse whisper, blindly pleading.

“I’ll talk to her in the morning, but I’ll take her with me to my floor. Nat, is that alright?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Natasha brushes off, hastily wiping away the tear that escaped. “She doesn’t want me.”

“Just not right now,” Steve tries to soften the blow, reaching to cup her cheek but she turns her head away. His frown deepens but lets it go for now, directing his attention to the little girl curled up by his right. “Rosebud.”

Steve slowly reaches for her, and she jumps at the sudden weight on her arm but she doesn’t move to shrug it off.

“Daddy?” Rose doesn’t open her eyes, simply pulls her hands away from her ears and reaches out towards him, her hand opening and closing desperately.

“Hey, Daddy’s got you. There we go,” Steve says gently, moving to pick her up and holds her against his chest. He feels that her shirt and shorts were damp against his own, and his eyes spot the small pool of liquid on the floor.

“She wet herself, she won’t let me touch her,” Natasha supplies, shaking her head. “You know where everything is.”

“Nat…”

“Go,” Natasha breathes out through a shaky exhale, then barks out at a harsher tone when he doesn’t immediately move. “I said go!”

Her eyes don’t miss the way Rose flinches at the command, squirming slightly in his hold to hide herself deeper against him. Steve stands up and quickly exits the room, presumably to gather a few of Rose’s things to change her into before retreating back to his floor.

Natasha makes quick work to clean the wet spot on the floor and her eyes sting with hot tears when she sees that Rose had left her blanket, thankfully unscathed, and she grabs it with shaking hands, rubbing her cheek against the soft wool.

_Don’t hurt me._

She buries her nose in it, inhaling deeply. It smells like her.

_Bad, don’t wan’ you!_

Her words echo in her mind and without a second thought, she screams in anguish.

Steve manages to get Rose back to sleep shortly after the incident, but when he gets her ready to bring her back to her floor the next morning, she doesn’t budge from her spot even as the elevator door opens.

“Come on, Ro, we’re gonna have breakfast with Mama,” Steve says, holding out his hand for her to take but she shakes her head, her hands balled into fists by her sides. “Or do you want her to come up here instead?”

Steve looks at her expectantly, and she mumbles something under her breath as she looks down on the floor.

“Rosie?”

“Jus’ you.”

Steve crouches down to her level, taking both her hands in his and tries to have her hold onto his fingers instead. “Just me? Nat would be sad if we had breakfast without her.”

Rose shakes her head again. “She gonna shoot me.”

“No, Rosie,” Steve says, firmly squeezing her hands. “That must’ve been really scary for you, but you know your Mama would never hurt you on purpose, right?”

Rose’s nod is tentative, the doubt immediately planted in her head after a single setback.

Steve picks her up and settles her on his hip. “I’ll be there when you talk it out, I’m sure she’ll be able to explain.”

He enters the elevator despite Rose’s protests and kicking feet, pressing the button leading to Natasha’s floor but it doesn’t light up, nor do the doors close. “Friday?”

“Good morning, Captain. Ms. Romanoff has updated security protocol on her level and has removed your clearance to enter,” Friday’s voice is polite, and Steve furrows his eyebrows.

“What about Rose? She can’t enter too?”

“That is correct,” He could’ve been imagining it, but he almost hears the regret in her voice. “However, she had instructed for you to go to the common area to collect Miss Rose’s belongings.”

“Put me through to Nat,” Steve tries to keep the frustration out of his tone, pressing the button leading to the reroute.

“Request denied.”

“Did she leave any other messages?”

“Negative.”

Steve resigns with a sigh, hiking Rose higher up his hip as he steps into the common room. He’s grateful for the lack of occupants at this time of the morning, and he scans the room, spotting a purple overnight bag that clearly belonged to Rose.

He checks the contents and finds enough clothes and items to last her a week, and there’s a small note on top of a folded blanket, which Rose promptly pulls out and wraps around her shoulders.

 _Take care of her. -_ _N_

“Dammit, Nat,” Steve curses under his breath. “Fri? Could you try contacting her again?”

A moment later, “Request denied.”

“Daddy,” Rose tugs on Steve’s pant leg. “M’hungry.”

“Yeah, of course,” Steve shakes his head, resolving to try again later after breakfast and he slings the bag over his shoulder before taking her hand and heading back to their floor.

He tries multiple times to contact her throughout the day, all of his attempts being dropped or denied. Rose hasn’t asked for Natasha or even mentioned her name even once, still shaken up by the events that had transpired the night before.

He’d always wanted Rose’s undivided attention, but not like this. Never like this.

It was only that night, once Rose was fast asleep in his room, was when he tries to call again with his phone and it finally, _finally,_ picks up after the fourth ring.

“You don’t know when to quit, do you,” Natasha’s voice sounds dejected, and Steve would’ve laughed if it wasn’t so heartbreaking.

“So I’ve been told,” Steve tries to lighten the mood, but the tension is far too tense for a throwaway joke. “Nat, how aware you?”

It was apparently the wrong thing to say. “Fucking peachy. Can I go now?”

“You owe Rose an explanation for what happened,” There was no point in dallying, Steve thinks, and Natasha lets out a mirthless chuckle.

“She doesn’t even want to see me.”

“That’s not true.”

“Has she asked for me the entire day?”

Steve wants to lie, but his lengthened silence was answer enough.

“I’ll call soon, just give me time,” Natasha exhales, her voice softer now. “Give her a kiss for me?”

“I will,” Steve promises. “Take care of yourse—,”

Natasha drops the call.

Steve doesn’t try to contact her again, respecting her wishes, but her radio silence seems to have also extended to the rest of the team, not showing up at the gym when she’s usually the first one there, and noticing how Steve is seen more often with Rose in tow as he goes around the compound with no Natasha in sight.

“Natasha skipped training again. Is she sick? I thought she can’t get sick,” Wanda asks one afternoon in the common area. She’s sitting on the floor across Rose, a baby doll on her lap. “She’s not answering my messages.”

Steve makes a noncommittal grunt, leaning back against the couch and toying with the miniature airplane Rose had placed in his hand. “She said she’ll reach out. But it’s been days, and I don’t even know if she’s left her floor.”

“Friday, has she?”

“That information is classified,” Friday chimes in helpfully.

“What happened anyway? Do you know?” Wanda inquires, turning her head quickly when she feels a tap on her shoulder. “Yes, Rosie. I am letting her take a nap.”

“You hold baby,” Rose instructs, and Wanda gives in, cradling the doll in one arm and rocking her slightly. She nods in approval before moving back to her dollhouse, allowing Wanda to turn her attention back to Steve.

“Sorry,” Wanda blushes, looking down at the doll that she was almost absentmindedly rocking to sleep. “You were saying?”

“It’s alright. I’m happy that you play with her like this,” Steve smiles easily, setting the airplane down on the coffee table. “And I’m…not entirely sure what happened. When I got to her room, there was a bullet hole through the door and both of them were on the floor.”

It earns a quiet gasp from Wanda. “Did she…”

“No. She would never hurt Rosie, not even subconsciously,” Steve clarifies. “She mentioned that all their hideouts got discovered back in Belarus, probably kept her on the edge. Didn’t realize what happened until after.”

“And you have not heard from her at all since then?”

“Just the night after that one but that’s it,” Steve runs his fingers through his hair, pulling at it slightly in distress. “I’m worried for the both of them. I don’t know how Nat is and Rosie hasn’t asked for her in days. That’s not…it doesn’t settle with me.”

“I think she misses her, she just can’t say it,” Wanda says in a low tone, looking back at the little girl in question. They watch her play house for a bit, Steve’s heart tightening when she hears her softly humming the tune Natasha usually would to lull her to sleep. “And one thing I learned about Natasha is that when she says something, she will follow through.”

“I know,” Steve exhales deeply.

“If she said she will call, she will. Don’t worry,” Wanda reassures, squeezing his knee comfortingly.

They play for a little while longer until just before dinner time, and when Steve and Rose arrive back at his floor, he’s surprised to see Natasha sitting by the dining table, looking more nervous that he’s ever seen her.

“Nat.”

He surveys her from where he’s standing and sees that she’s still as exhausted as she looked from a few days ago, maybe even more so, but the haunted look in her eyes was gone, her gaze darting between him and Rose who was holding tightly onto his hand.

“Hi,” Natasha starts feebly, standing up and slowly stepping towards the pair, only stopping a few feet away when she sees Rose tense up slightly. She waits for a moment, and when she doesn’t recoil or hide behind Steve, she takes it as a good sign before dropping down to her knees. “Hi, Rosie.”

Rose waves at her shyly before pressing the side of her head to Steve’s thigh. Rose doesn’t move to step closer, and Natasha knows that this is as good as it’s going to get.

“Do you remember when you were taken from me, that even when we got you back home, you sometimes forgot where you were?” Natasha asks gently, sitting back on her heels. She waits for Rose to nod before carrying on. “It was scary, right?”

Another nod.

“When we were out on that mission, everywhere we went, the bad guys kept finding our hiding spots,” Natasha simplifies. “We always had to be ready in case they come at us in the middle of the night.”

Rose loosens her hold on Steve’s pant leg, and Natasha considers it a step forward.

“So when I got back and heard the door open, I didn’t realize I was already home. I thought I was back there.”

“Didn’t see me?” Rose whispers almost too softly for Natasha to hear from where she’s sitting, but she reads her lips and shakes her head.

“I didn’t, not at first,” Natasha lets her know, makes sure she knows it's not intentional. “But I heard you right after. That pulled me right out.”

Rose nods in understanding. She hates that she can relate to something as severe as this but it lifts her hopes up when she catches the recognition of the same feeling in her daughter’s eyes.

“I was afraid that the mission wasn’t over, that it had managed to follow me home. But Rosie, when I finally saw you by the door asking me not to hurt you…” Natasha trails off, swallowing thickly. “I never wanted that to happen, and I’m so, so sorry that it did.”

Steve had also sat down on the floor at this point, and Rose makes a few tentative steps forward until she was at arms reach from her mother.

“Wanted to s’prise you when you waked up, ‘cause you said my hugs make you feel better,” Rose confesses gingerly, reaching a finger out to catch a tear rolling down Natasha’s cheek. “But I thought you became bad ‘cause you wanted to shoot me. Loud boom made my ears hurt and you p’omised to not hurt me but you did.”

Natasha fully breaks down into sobs, wanting to reach out and hold her close but she doesn’t want to push, she doesn’t think she has the right to.

“Never, Rosie, I would n-never,” Natasha tells her, promising to prove it to her everyday until she believes it again. “I’m so sorry.”

“Jus’ an accident,” Rose reassures, echoing what she’s heard so many times and she’s finally on the receiving end. Natasha presses her face into Rose’s stomach as she heaves, and Rose, her patient, wonderful girl, pats her hair in an effort to soothe. “J-jus’ scared? Not bad?”

“Very scared,” Natasha pulls away, sniffling slightly. They sit in silence for a few moments, and Natasha reaches for her daughter’s free hand. “Baby?”

Rose’s face crumples at the nickname, quickly closing the space between them and Natasha chokes out another sob, relief coursing through her veins at being able to hold her tightly again, and this time, she wasn’t letting go.

“M’sorry for callin’ you bad,” Rose hiccups into her neck, wrapping her arms tightly around her back. “No more sad, Mama. M-miss you.”

“I’ve missed my baby too, so much,” Natasha exhales, holding her close and pressing kisses where ever her lips could reach. Her gaze meets Steve’s over Rose’s shoulder, quietly watching the reunion unfold, and she manages a smile when she sees him with his eyes shining with unshed tears.

“Can I stay here tonight?” Natasha asks, and Steve nods firmly, crawling the short distance between them to press a kiss to her forehead, keeping his lips there for a little while longer.

“You don’t have to ask,” Steve murmurs, but his eyes are searching, questioning.

Natasha only nods, standing up from her position on the floor with no intention of letting Rose go. She motions for him to follow her back to her floor and when they arrive, Steve frowns at the sight before him.

It was as if someone had broken in and ransacked the entire floor and left no stone unturned—some of the furniture was broken, and ceramic and glass shards littered the living room and kitchen. There was no sight of Rose’s belongings caught up in the mess, and he could only assume that Natasha had set them aside in her room for safe keeping.

“Nat…” Steve looks around with wide eyes, and when Rose tries to lift her head up to see, Natasha keeps it pressed against her chest, murmuring something to her and she nods, pressing her nose into her neck.

“I didn’t want anyone to see this,” Natasha mumbles, leading him to her room. Apart from the bed being unmade, everything else was spared. The bullet hole on the door was also gone, already filled up and painted over. “Every time I closed my eyes, I just saw her face and I hate that for a moment, I was the one she was terrified of.”

“Rosie’s already forgiven you—,”

“Doesn’t mean I’ve already forgiven myself,” Natasha huffs out, running her finger back and forth across the back of Rose’s scalp, earning a soft coo. “I got rid of all my weapons, even the ones I hid around the floor. Put them back in the middle of the night.”

Steve nods, sitting down on the bed next to her.

“I’m…I’m thinking of retiring from fieldwork,” Natasha confesses, and her heart immediately feels lighter at the words finally being out of her system. “But I don’t want to stop working. Maybe just stay on the ground as coordinator.”

“I don’t know how the team will function without you there with us but we’ll try to manage,” Steve chuckles a bit, pulling a small smile from Natasha. “You know I’ll support you whatever you choose.”

“I think I’ll miss it too, but I can’t risk this happening again,” Natasha shakes her head. “It’s time for me to step down.”

Steve takes her free hand and squeezes it tightly before running his thumb over her knuckles.

“You’ve already done so much for the world,” Steve reassures. “It’s only fair to want to focus on yours.”

“Ours,” Natasha bumps her shoulder with his, and he rewards her with a warm smile.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Ours.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose starts her first day of kindergarten, Steve and Natasha deal with the repercussions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Loosely based on Adhara_S’s prompt: The public's reaction to Nat and Steve's relationship and Rose's adoption.
> 
> I struggled with touching on the general public’s opinions, so I shifted the focus to a (literally) smaller control group. Hope that’s alright! x

She doesn’t exactly know where to start.

Natasha had been mulling over the thought of having Rose start Kindergarten soon after being brought up by Laura on their last visit. She knows that apart from the Barton children, she hasn’t had much steady interaction with children her age and figures that it’s something that needs to be remedied.

It explains her current state—she has brochures of prospective schools laid out in front of her on the bed, picking a random one up and reading through the details.

“There’s no mention of security here,” Natasha notes quietly, setting it aside and grabbing the next one.

“You know she can start school when she turns six, right?” Steve’s voice is thick with sleep, but shifts and slings his arm around her waist, nuzzling his face into her side. “No harm in waiting it out. I saw a few studies that said—,” 

“You’ve been reading those parenting forums again,” Natasha chuckles, shuffling the brochures into a neat stack. “It’s just kindergarten. I don’t like leaving her anywhere as much as you do but it's probably for the best. She needs friends.”

“Wanda’s her friend,” Steve huffs indignantly, half serious. “She has the team too and gets along well with Clint’s kids. She’s set.”

“I meant kids her age, though I do find it amusing that you refer to the team as children,” Natasha laughs, carding her fingers through his hair and tugging softly. “And Clint’s kids don’t count. She only sees them every once in a while.”

“There’s also the fact that she’s barely grown an inch since you—,”

“What’s bothering you about her starting school?” Natasha cuts him off, putting the brochures down on the side table and Steve pulls away from her side, sitting up to meet her gaze. “Steve?”

“We’ll have to enroll her in,” Steve starts tentatively, waiting to see if she’ll catch his drift. She probably already knows, but she doesn’t interrupt or say otherwise. “We’re not exactly unknown, Nat.”

“I’ve thought about that,” Natasha hums, leaning back against the headboard. “Two avengers enroll a small child in kindergarten. Sounds like the start of a bad joke.”

“I’m serious.”

“You don’t think I am?” Natasha quips, but not unkindly. “I’ve been scanning private schools nearby, and I’m having Friday tap into their ‘state-of-the-art’ security protocols. We’d only be a few minutes away, plus, if you’re that concerned about your image, I could always bring her alone.”

“Not gonna happen,” Steve immediately protests, sliding back down under the covers when he sees her doing so.

“Calm down, dad,” Natasha grins, turning on her side to face him. “It’s not like I could stop you from missing it, anyway.”

“Are you using an alias?”

“I don’t think I will,” Natasha says thoughtfully, earning a look of surprise from Steve. “She’s registered legally under my name. Might as well come clean from the get go.”

“You aren’t afraid of what people might think?” Steve murmurs, pulling her close against him. He knows about Natasha’s own insecurity of her mothering skills despite his reassurance that he hasn’t seen a child as loved as Rose, but his worry stems from people who knows her reputation as solely the Black Widow and how vicious opinions can spread faster than a wildfire. 

“I know people will talk,” Natasha’s voice is just as quiet, her mind somewhere else completely—she’s not concerned about her enrolling Rose in a school, but rather on how Steve would be perceived when they’re out and about as themselves. She’s more than aware of how the public sees him, and how they see her. “Captain America and Black Widow together, you think you can handle that backlash?”

Natasha traces patterns on the small of his back, and when she peers up, she finds a genuinely confused look painted across his face. “Why would there be backlash? It’s not a bad thing.”

His sincerity is overwhelming, Natasha finds, and she suddenly presses a light kiss on his collarbone, the tension leaving her body at his words. “Nothing.”

“Plus, the only opinion I care about is yours.”

“Sap,” Natasha fails to fight off a smile.

“I mean it.”

“Go to sleep, Rogers,” She deflects, but squeezes his waist tight for a moment before relaxing her arm. “Lots to do tomorrow.”

“Mmhmm,” Steve hums, his eyes already closed. “Good night, Nat.” 

Over the next week, they manage to settle on a school after visiting the area to inspect the floor plans and strategic exits should the emergency call for it, and once the team had learned that their youngest member was starting kindergarten, they had Tony anonymously donate a considerable amount to further enhance the school’s near-optimal security systems.

They talk to Rose two weeks before she was to start, and she immediately warms up to the idea of learning new things and meeting new friends, but doesn’t show her excitement until her first day of school finally arrives.

She knocks at Natasha’s door and she answers it only a few moments later, stifling a yawn as she does.

“Mama, it’s school day.”

“It’s still dark out, Rosie, you’ve still got a few more hours,” Natasha shakes her head at her eagerness, taking her hand and walking her back to her room. “I’ll wake you up a bit earlier, the team wants to have breakfast with you before we go.”

“M’excited, Mama,” Rose grins, but allows herself to be tucked back in under the covers. “Wanna learn how t’read and have more friends like Lila and Coop and baby Nate.”

“And you will,” Natasha kisses her forehead. “Now sleep.” 

Rose settles and slips back into a restful sleep after a while, Natasha leaving once she’s fully out and Steve slips into her room only a few hours later to coax her back awake. 

"Morning, Rosebud. First day of school," Steve kneels by her side, brushing her hair away from her forehead, her light curls reaching a little past her ears. "Gotta get moving."

Rose hums groggily, sitting up in bed slowly before reaching her arms out, opening and closing her fists. "Up, Daddy."

"Alright, c'mon," Steve smiles, picking her up in his arms and carrying her to the bathroom, letting her do her morning rituals before helping her wash up and changing her into the clothes that Natasha picked out the night before. "You excited?"

"Mmhmm," Rose smiles, finally a bit more awake now. Steve takes a few more minutes to comb her hair down but fails miserably at taming the flyaway curls, eventually pocketing a few hair elastics to bring up for Natasha to fix. He pulls out his phone and quickly switches it to the camera, a skill he's practically mastered overnight after taking on the father role more seriously, and takes a few—maybe two dozen—photos of his little girl.

"Smile!"

"Daddy, you 'lready have so many pictures," Rose grumbles, but relents by giving him a bright smile anyways. "Let's go!” 

She takes his hand and they make their way up to the communal area, and they're met with it already bustling with life. People are scattered around the room—Tony, Bruce, and Sam by the couches, Clint, Wanda, and Bucky helping Natasha in the kitchen, and Steve raises his eyebrows at the presence of Thor setting the table.

"Thor's here," Steve points out dumbly, and the man in question, hearing his name, only smiles at their direction and holds his hand up to wave at them. "You weren't lying when you said the whole team."

"I couldn't pass the opportunity to see the little one accomplish a milestone, though I apologize for being absent for her earlier achievements," Thor sounds deeply guilty, but Steve only shakes his head and picks Rose up in his arms.

"Hey, Rosie, you want to say hi to Uncle Thor?"

Thor's face brightens at the title, and he bows his head slightly, making Rose giggle behind her hand.

"It is an honor to finally make your acquaintance, Rosie," Thor greets, and Rose waves at him, thoroughly enjoying his manner of speaking.

“Hi, Uncle Tho’,” Rose responds a bit bashfully, and she turns her head to see Bucky shooting her a funny face. “Uncle Bucky! Can you fix my hair?”

“Come here, doll,” Bucky chuckles as he approaches them, clapping a hand over Steve’s shoulder before taking Rose from his grasp. “Your dad here needs to learn sooner of later.”

Steve hands him the elastics before quickly excusing himself to find Natasha in the kitchen, standing in front of the stove with a hand on her hip.

“She’s chipper, I heard you both come in,” Natasha comments when she feels a hand circle around her waist. “And I also didn’t know about Thor.”

“She’s got quite the support system, that’s for sure,” Steve muses, pressing a quick kiss to her sweat dampened temple. “I’ll take over. Go change.”

“Always the charmer,” Natasha rolls her eyes, but acquiesces after making a quick detour to greet her daughter before going down to her floor to freshen up.

Steve was finishing off the last batch of pancakes when Natasha comes back up, and they all gather at the dining table with Rose taking the seat at the head of the table with her parents on either side of them.

“Are you excited, Rosie?” Clint asks, and Rose eagerly nods her head.

“Yeah,” Rose grins, kicking her feet back and forth. “Mama and Daddy said it’s fun an’ I get to play.”

The whole table brightens at her enthusiasm and they finish up with breakfast after a short while with enough time to spare for a group photo with the team.

“I’ll take yours," Wanda offers, taking Steve's phone and Natasha immediately gathers Rose into her arms to pose for the photo.

Rose wraps her arms around both their necks, grinning as widely as she can, and the two adults press a kiss on each cheek, sandwiching her face in the middle and making her squeal in surprise. Wanda snaps as many shots as she can to make sure they have a selection to choose from. 

"Alright, gotta go," Natasha hikes her higher up on her hip, telling her to say goodbye to the team before they head to the car. 

Steve drives the short distance from the compound to the school, and they immediately see a small gaggle of children and parents outside, perhaps waiting for further instruction to go in, and they park quickly before making their way towards the entrance. 

As soon as they step into the crowd, they turn more than a few heads with parents already whispering amongst themselves. The children are less subtle, however, pointing at them and tugging on their parents' arms, their eyes wide with wonder.

"That's Capt'n America!" A little boy hollers out, but Steve pays him no mind as he was busy picking Rose up in his arms when they felt her starting to stagger with all the attention towards them. 

They make their way inside the building and stop just in front of her classroom. Through the windows they could see it's decorated with bright colors and posters with letter forms and cartoon animals, and a few children have already started to populate the middle of the room, the teacher and aide showing them their respective seats.

Steve puts Rose down on the floor and crouch down to her level, both sporting encouraging smiles.

"Alright, baby, have a great first day, okay? We'll pick you up in a few hours," Natasha leans in to kiss her forehead, and she's met with a look of surprise as soon as she pulls away. "What's wrong?"

"You're...not stayin'?" Rose pouts slightly, and they immediately brace themselves for a tantrum that might happen if they don't tread carefully. "I-I thought..."

"We told you, sweetheart, that you'll be making new friends your age and you get to learn a lot of new things," Steve tries to soothe, rubbing her arm. "And when we pick you up, we'd love to hear what you did on your first day." 

"But wan' you to stay," Rose'a voice cracks, tears starting to form in the corner of her eyes. "Don't wanna go in 'nymore, Mama. Wan' stay with you." 

"Rosie," Natasha starts, but she's immediately ambushed and ends up with an armful of sobbing almost-five year old. "Shh, baby. Calm down, it's okay." 

"I can see she's got a case of the first day blues," The teacher pops her head out of the classroom, smiling sympathetically at the pair. If she's recognized the both of them, she doesn't let it show. "You are welcome to stay and observe for a few minutes, if you'd like. We've got a a couple of parents sitting at the back of the room. We understand that this can be a scary transition for them and we want to make it as easy as possible."

Natasha and Steve give each other a quick glance, not needing a verbal confirmation.

"Hey, Rosebud, did you hear that? We can stay with you for a bit," Steve murmurs, rubbing her back. Natasha whispers words of encouragement in her ear as she calms her down, and Rose, still teary-eyed and sniffling, reluctantly allows herself to be pulled into the room a few moments later.

"Hi there, honey," The teacher crouches down to her level, Steve and Natasha hovering close. "I'm Mrs. Gibson, and I'll be your teacher for this year. Could you tell me your name?"

She looks up at Natasha as if to ask for permission, and she nods her head, a patient smile on her face.

"R-rosie."

Her voice is barely above a whisper, and she resists the urge to suck her thumb. The teacher smiles at her comfortingly before leading her towards an area of a long table with crayons and a coloring sheet laid out.

"That's a very pretty name! Look here, see? This is your desk, we've put your name on it but I'll make sure to change it to Rosie," The teacher points at the name tag that read ‘Rose’ at the back of the chair. "We'll be meeting your classmates in a little while, but do you think you could color this in as we wait?"

Rose nods compliantly, further relaxing at the teacher's easygoing behavior, and settles on the chair before picking up a yellow crayon and starting to scribble away on the page.

"Your daughter's a sweet girl," Mrs. Gibson says as soon as she sees Rose fully engrossed in coloring. "You can stay at the back, we've got adult-sized chairs prepared, don't worry."

Steve manages a quick thank you before they make their way to the back area, sitting next to each other and observing the room with both curiosity and vigilance.

"So this is kindergarten," Steve mutters, earning a snort from his left. "Next thing we know, she'll be off to college."

"Don't do that," Natasha huffs, crossing her arms over her chest. 

Steve was the only male present in the group of mothers sitting at the back, and they naturally gravitate towards him, trying to sit as close as they can and finding ways to grab his attention without looking too desperate. 

Natasha finds it amusing, but eventually puts a hand on his thigh, squeezing it both comfortingly and possessively.

"You alright, honey?" Natasha jokes loud enough for the other mothers to hear, and Steve chuckles, taking her hand and kissing her knuckles, a clear sign of him playing alone with her ruse.

"I'm great, darling," Steve grins. He hears a nursery rhyme play, turning his head and when he spots little Rose trying to follow the teacher leading a simple dance, he takes his phone out with his free hand. "Hold on, I gotta get this."

"You're worse than me," Natasha shakes her head, but she opts to watch her daughter in real time instead, noticing that she's significantly smaller than all her other classmates but she doesn't seem to be too bothered by it. She chuckles at her look of concentration as she shakes her hips, trying her hardest but she couldn't quite move the way the teacher shows them how to. "Oh, look at her go."

"Like a fish out of water," Steve comments with a fond smile, and Natasha couldn't deny his statement. "She's perfect."

Mrs. Gibson announces after the small dance break that the children who had their parents staying at the back needed to say goodbye for the rest of the session, and Rose wastes no time in sprinting towards them, jumping into Natasha's lap and wrapping her arms around her neck.

"Are you having fun?" Natasha murmurs, and Rose nods almost guiltily—she hadn't expected to enjoy it as much as she did. "That's good, baby. We're glad. Do you think you'll be alright here on your own?"

Rose nods, a bit braver this time, giving her a kiss and leaning over to offer the same to Steve.

"You come back for me, okay?" Rose whispers, her insecurity palpable, and Natasha fights every instinct in her body to just pick her up and head home.

"Of course, Rosie," Steve reassures, kissing her cheek soundly and earning a soft giggle. "We'd miss you too much if we didn't." 

They reluctantly part ways, grateful that Rose doesn't cry again the second time around, but as soon as they get in the car, Natasha lets out a deep, shaky exhale, running her hand through her hair.

"Nat?"

"I couldn't cry in there, too many people," Natasha swipes at her damp cheeks, letting out a garbled laugh. "Our baby's in kindergarten."

Steve's heart swells at the collective term. She rarely refers to Rose as theirs, even though physically she shows that she's just as much as his as she was hers by making sure he's involved in everything that concerned the little girl.

It felt good to hear it out loud every once in a while.

As soon as they get home, though, their domestic bubble bursts as they were met with Pepper in the communal area. 

“I promised you no press,” Pepper starts cooly, only slightly agitated at her plans going askew. “But parents, I couldn’t control. You’re all over social.”

“Figures,” Natasha mutters, sitting down on the couch across her. “Did they get any shots of Rosie?”

“They were nice enough to keep her out of them, and I’m having FRIDAY take down every tabloid site that pops up with the image,” Pepper sounds apologetic now, her eyebrows furrowing at the screen in front of her. “These mothers are relentless, they keep re-uploading. They probably think it’s a glitch in the app.”

“What’s the public consensus?”

“I didn’t get very far with reading them, I had them taken down as soon as I saw the headlines—,”

“What did the headlines say?” Natasha presses, her face neutral.

“Black Widow Manages to Domesticate Its Prey,” Pepper regretfully recounts, and she could see Steve wince at the implications it held against Natasha. “There’s also the classic ‘Avengers Secret Love-Child’ but let’s be real, they slap that on every time they see any of us out with a niece or nephew.”

“Nat?” Steve’s voice is cautious, sitting next to her and reaching for her hand, relieved that she doesn’t pull away.

“As long as they don’t involve or talk about Rosie, I don’t care what they say,” Natasha tells them honestly, squeezing Steve’s hand for good measure. “Keep an eye on that?”

“I’ll monitor it myself,” Pepper promises.

Meanwhile, at kindergarten, the teacher had called out for free play for the last hour, the teacher’s aide staying inside to watch over the children who wanted to play on the mat and Mrs. Gibson keeping watch over the activity on the playground.

Rose opted to stay inside, observing the other children pulling toys out from cubby holes and corners of the room. Hesitantly, she approaches a cluster of girls playing with a dollhouse, drawn in by the familiarity. She manages to insert herself in the crowd seamlessly but doesn’t notice how they slowly inch away from her.

“Can I play?” Rose uses the politest voice she can muster, and she thinks she hears one of them snigger but a voice from the right distracts her from focusing on it.

“You’re so tiny, are you sure you’re already five?” The girl was almost a full head taller than her, with golden hair reaching down to her waist.

“M’almost five.” Rose informs them timidly, and she finds it strange how the girl starts to laugh, the others following not long after.

“Go play with blocks or something.”

She squirms under their collective, scrutinizing gazes, and when it got too much, she gets up and rushes outside to the playground.

She doesn’t know why they were so mean, but she refuses to cry especially now when she promised her Mama and Daddy that she’d be brave for them here.

She dejectedly walks towards the slide, trying to make the most out of her time outside until a boy taps her shoulder, giving her a small smile.

“Do you wanna play with us? We need a seeker.”

Rose’s spirits immediately lift at the offer, and she follows him dutifully to a small group of three other kids, explaining to her the mechanics of the game as they walk.

“She gets it, Daniel. Now close your eyes,” A boy pipes up, coming up behind her to put his hands over her eyes. “You count to twenty, but I’ll let go after you get to ten.”

She hears them scramble away as soon as she starts counting. His hands smell earthy, but she doesn’t pay much mind and he does lets go after reaching ten. She carries on with counting and struggles a bit with opening her eyes, her eyelids suddenly heavier and caked with something strange. She reaches her hand up and grimaces at the mud coating a good upper half of her face.

She doesn’t know what she did wrong, but it must’ve been something bad for them to treat her like this. She can’t help the tears that well in her eyes, and when she lets out a wail, Daniel peeks out from his hiding spot behind the bush and rushes to her.

“Ethan!” Daniel yells out, trying his best to wipe her face with his hands but Rose turns away from him, wrapping her arms around her waist. “We didn’t talk about this!”

“It was just a joke, I didn’t know she’d be such a baby about it,” Ethan scoffs, not at all repentant for his actions. “She probably is just a baby, look at how small she is.”

“Stop being mean,” Daniel pulls away from Rose, pushing Ethan to the ground. Before it could escalate any further, Mrs. Gibson marches towards them, frowning at the sight of Rose but puts on a stern front in front of the boys.

“What is going on here?”

“Ethan was bein’ mean to Rosie!” Daniel was quick to drag his friend through the mud, just as he had literally done to the girl. “He made her face dirty but we were just s’posed to play hide and seek!”

“Ethan, I’m going to have a word with your parents, but I need you to apologize first to Rosie,” Mrs. Gibson crouches down to their level, helping Rose stand steadily on her feet as she hiccups out little sobs. “What you did wasn’t very nice.”

“Sorry, Rosie,” Ethan mumbles halfheartedly, his eyes still brimming with mischief. “That you couldn’t handle a little mud.”

“That is enough, Ethan,” Mrs. Gibson chastises sternly, grabbing Rose’s and Ethan’s hands in each of hers and instructing Daniel to follow along, leading them back inside through the building’s main entrance. She sighs deeply when she spots Rose’s parents already waiting in front of the classroom, just a few minutes shy from dismissal.

Rose catches a glimpse of her mother and she pulls her hand away, her tears back in full force and all but sprinting towards her.

“Mama, Mama!” Rose yells out, and Natasha crouches down to catch her in her arms, frowning at the state her daughter’s face was in. Steve quickly pulls out a handkerchief from his pocket and helps wipe her face over her shoulder, glancing up at the teacher then down at the culprit, who had quickly paled at the knowledge of who his target’s parents were.

“Rosie, what happened? Who did this to you?” Natasha whispers in her ear, taking Steve’s handkerchief to wipe her face more thoroughly. Rose hiccups and heaves, grasping at her mother’s shoulders tightly as her body shakes with sobs.

“They wouldn’t let me play inside so I went out a-and they let me be the seeker but E-ethan,” Rose stammers out. “Ethan made my face dirty. I w-was good, Mama, p’omise! Dunno what I d-did.”

Natasha’s heart clenches at the thought of her daughter blaming herself for playground bullying, and Steve, upon hearing Rose’s tearful confession, stalks towards the trio in front of the classroom and genuflects down to the boys’ heights, both of their backs ramrod straight under the scrutiny of Captain America’s no-nonsense gaze.

“Which one of you is Ethan?”

They’re both silent for a while, until Natasha clears her throat and gives the boy in question a steady glare.

“I-I am, sir.”

“Why did you think it was alright to do what you did?” Steve’s voice was firm but gentle, sounding very much like a disappointed father. “Did you think that was funny?”

“N-no, sir, but—,”

“Then why did you do it?”

“I d-don’t know, sir. I’m sorry, sir.”

“You shouldn’t be apologizing to me,” Steve cocks his head to the side, motioning to Rose slowly calming down in Natasha’s hold. “Go on.”

Steve watches him scuttle off to say sorry to his daughter, and he turns his head to see the other boy still in his spot, waiting for his turn to be talked to.

“And you?”

“I’m Daniel, s-sir,” Daniel gulps thickly. “I asked Rosie to play with us but I didn’t know Ethan would do that so I pushed him. I’m sorry, sir.”

“Pushing him doesn’t make you any better than him, son,” Steve reminds him, sounding much kinder than earlier. “But you were just trying to help my Rosie, correct?”

“Yes, sir. She reminds me of my sister, sir.”

“Then I’d like to say thank you.”

Daniel blinks, his eyes wide at his words. “Y-you’re welcome.”

Steve stands up to his full height, turning back to glance at Ethan looking fully remorseful, Natasha saying something to him that he couldn’t seem to make out. He smiles tightly at the teacher, who had simply been standing there as he talked to the boys.

“I hope this doesn’t happen again,” Steve says pointedly, and she nods once.

“I’ll make sure of it, Mr. Rogers,” Mrs. Gibson reassures. “I’ll also let Ethan’s parents know what happened.”

She starts to lead Ethan back inside and tells Daniel to follow suit, but the latter reroutes and steps in front of Rose, reaching out to pat her shoulder.

“Are you feelin’ better, Rosie?” Daniel asks, and Rose looks up at him, giving him a small smile.

“Yeah,” Rose’s voice is hoarse from crying, and she presses her back further against her mother. “Mama, he’s nice. He’s my friend.”

“That’s good to know,” Natasha hums, her eyes looking up at the boy in front of her. “Thank you for helping Rosie.”

“You’re welcome, Miss Rosie’s Mama.”

“Call me Miss Nat, how’s that?” Natasha reaches out to ruffle his hair, and he grins widely, a tooth missing from the top row.

“Okay,” He takes Rose’s hand and pulls her inside the room. “C’mon, Rosie, we gotta get your bag.”

“To think this was just her first day,” Natasha shakes her head as soon as they’re the only ones left in the hallway, standing up from her crouched position on the floor. “She told me about the girls who wouldn’t let her play. All the kids are brats. Except Daniel.”

“I’m not feeling so inclined to bring her back here tomorrow,” Steve says, his back against the wall while watching the children through the window scrambling to get their bags from their cubby holes. “Does she have to?” 

“We’ll take her out if it gets too much. But she bounced back fast after everything that happened,” Natasha says thoughtfully, leaning her head on his shoulder. “I hate to say it, but she isn’t any safer with us than she is out here.”

“Bye, Daniel!” They hear Rose’s voice, still slightly hoarse but her tone much happier, giving him a quick hug by the door before running towards Steve.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Steve catches her mid-air as she jumps, quickly settling her on his hip. Natasha takes his free hand as they walk out the building, remembering to shield Rose’s face when they spot parents and nannies pulling out their phones to catch a quick photo of them to upload online.

When they finally make it back to the car, they strap Rose in and the two adults let out a collective sigh of relief.

“You think it’ll die down soon?” Steve starts the ignition, and Natasha chuckles mirthlessly as she puts on her seatbelt. 

“Give it a few weeks,” Natasha shrugs before turning her head back to look at Rose. “Hey, baby. You alright?”

“Mmhmm,” Rose nods absently, clutching her blanket that they had left in the car before dropping her off. “I didn’t do ‘nything bad, right, Mama? Why’re the other kids so mean?”

“People don’t like the things they don’t understand,” Natasha settles with that, trying to sound as reassuring as possible. “And you’re perfect, baby, don’t mind them. They just haven’t seen how wonderful you are yet.”

“That’s true,” Steve confirms. “And you’ve always got us on your side, no matter what.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Steve doesn’t like bullies.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha's first Mother's day didn't exactly go as planned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based on steveandnatlover's prompt: Rosie and Steve celebrate Natasha's first Mother's Day with her.
> 
> This is set two weeks after the events of Chapter 7.

“Can I try?”

Rose watches Steve leisurely sketching over the armrest of the couch. She enjoys seeing him bring objects to life, enjoys guessing what he draws before he finishes them, but it was the first time she’d ever shown interest in doing it herself.

Steve couldn’t be more pleased.

“Come here,” Steve smiles, beckoning her over to sit next to her and he rips a page from the back of his sketchpad, laying it over a coffee table book before placing both on her lap. He teaches her how to grip the pencil properly when she fists it in her hand, and just as she touches the led on the paper, she looks up at him for further guidance.

“What I draw? Show me, p’ease.”

“Anything you want,” Steve offers dumbly, and when Rose cocks her head to the side, he tries to elaborate. “You’ve seen me do it lots of times. You think of the things that make you happy or looks pretty, and you put it on paper.”

“S’that why you like to draw Mama a lot?”

Steve tries his hardest not to blush, but eventually gives in to the little girl’s innocent question. “That’s right.”

“Mama makes me happy. Can I draw her too?”

“Of course you can,” Steve encourages, reaching over to place the tray of colored pencils next to her. “I don’t use these much, but you can color her in too if you’d like.”

Rose nods, looking thoughtful for a moment before lightly pushing her pencil around and starting to draw, her grip going back to a fist somewhere along the way. She’s frustrated that she can’t seem to make her hand work the way she wants it to, but she carries on and tries her best to put in the details she remembers him adding to his.

They work in silence for a good hour, with Steve looking over to his side to check on her every once in a while, and turns her paper over when he sees that she’s starting to fill in the corners of the page.

“Art lessons already?” Natasha spots them as she walks into the living room, sitting on the free space on the other side of the couch. Rose immediately brightens at her presence and shifts to rest her back against her side. “Whatcha got there?”

“I draw like Steve,” Rose announces softly, earning a proud grin from the man in question. She holds her page up to show off her work. “See?”

Natasha smiles at the mess of lines haphazardly strewn across the page, with scribbles of color strategically placed to form a vague rendition of a face. “Beautiful work, Rosie."

Rose pushes the back of her head against her chest at the praise, and Natasha looks up to see Steve looking at her with a proud expression on his face.

“Oh, no, I know that look,” Natasha jests, shaking her head when Steve only laughs.

“Too late,” Steve had already made a mental list of items he’ll be bringing down from his personal stash to pass on to her—he might even place an order for jumbo grip crayons. “I’m supporting this hobby as long as she enjoys it.”

“Can you draw, Mama?” Rose asks, moving to hand her the pencil, but Natasha only chuckles.

“I can draw, of course,” Natasha nods, kissing the top of her head. “But if you’re asking if I can draw well, now that’s a different story.”

Steve does place an order for jumbo grip crayons later that evening, as well as a myriad of other children’s drawing supplies throughout the course of the next few weeks. Rose enjoys the sudden onslaught of art activities Steve proposes almost every other day, and when he realizes that Mother’s day was coming up soon, he figures that a handmade masterpiece from her daughter would be the best course of action.

“Can you cut heart?” Rose asks, handing him a piece of red paper. Steve, sitting cross legged on the communal area living room floor across the four year old, accepts the task and goes to work with the focus of a man on a mission.

Rose folds another piece of paper in half before turning it lengthwise and drawing figures on it with a more proper grip and a blue marker. “Steve?”

“Are we writing on this one too?”

“Yeah, all of ‘em,” Rose nods, handing him the card, and he smiles approvingly at the more decipherable figures compared to the first time she held a pencil. All of her drawings were similar in nature, Natasha starring in most of her cards, but she drew herself in a few of them and feels touched when he sees that he’s drawn the three of them in this one. “Can you write ‘Love you Mama from Rosie and Steve’.”

Steve writes it down in a legible scrawl inside the card before setting it on top of the small stack of ones she’s already finished. He didn’t have the heart to tell her that one card would’ve been enough.

“Hey, you know what would be nice?” Steve hums, cutting out another heart, a pink one this time. “If you could draw the whole team, and we could have them write on it too.”

“Yeah, I wanna do that!” Rose bobs her head eagerly, her hand quickly grabbing a new sheet of paper but pauses before she could start. “Steve, i’s not gonna fit.”

“Ah, hold on,” Steve puts his scissors down and takes three more pieces of paper, laying it out next to the one Rose already had and taped them together to form a large rectangle. “There you go.”

“Thank ‘ou!” Rose grins, flopping on her stomach and beginning to fill the large sheet with her own renditions of her uncles, with Wanda and Bucky, and their little family unit being slightly larger than the rest of the team. It takes her a good while before finishing drawing them in, and just as she picks up a crayon to start coloring, Steve situates himself next to her and lays on his stomach as well, picking up a red crayon.

“This looks amazing, Rosebud,” Steve praises, slightly ruffling her hair. “You even got Tony’s facial hair right.”

“I also draw his car,” Rose points at the rectangle with two circles below them. “An’ you have your shield and Mama’s carryin’ me here. I’m gonna color Uncle Bucky’s arm and make Wanda’s hands red for her magic.”

“And Bruce?”

“I draw his glasses!” Rose giggles, quickly grabbing a black marker and adding more squiggles on the top of his head. “And Clint and Auntie Laura and my cousins are here too.”

“What’s this one?” Steve asks, pointing at the tiny figure above Natasha’s head and below a flying Sam. It’s a small blob of a thing, he couldn’t really tell, but there’s a small heart over it.

“I’s my sister! We have the same name, Mama telled me,” Rose explains simply. “She was gone when she was a baby but Mama said she’s still family.”

Steve only blinks, not knowing that Rose was aware of Natasha’s stillborn child, but it’s touching how she makes sure she’s included and thinks of her as such. He smiles and nods, kissing her temple before helping her color. They're done in half the time, gluing on the red and pink hearts Steve had cut out right after and Rose grins as soon as she looks down at their joint masterpiece.

“You want to put the greeting up on the top? I’ll help you with the letters,” Steve asks, and Rose nods, her hand already poised to write. She asks if she could write Happy Mama’s Day instead, and he’s quick to concede.

Just as they start clearing up the floor, Natasha comes through the elevator doors and Steve scrambles to hide the massive card and the pile of smaller ones behind the coffee table.

“Well aren’t you colorful,” Natasha chuckles at the sight of Rose, her cheeks and arms smeared with dried paint and colored marker strokes, her fingertips rough with dried glitter glue. “Steve, be honest. Are you sure that the paint made it on the paper?”

“I’m respecting her process,” Steve shrugs. “Kids get messy.”

“I know they do,” Natasha nods. “Which is why you’re on bath duty.”

“Bubbles!” Rose giggles, knowing that Steve often indulges her with them every time he’s in charge of getting her ready for bed. “Now?”

“Can I at least see what you made? Must be some project,” Natasha muses, but Rose, not wanting to reveal their secret, asks to be carried and she complies easily.

“Wanna bath,” Rose kicks her feet slightly, looking back at Steve. “M’dirty, Mama. Don’t like it.”

“I’ll just clean up here and I’ll be right up, alright, Ro?” Steve says, shuffling forward to press a quick kiss on the top of her head before giving Natasha one as well. “Meeting go well?”

“I passed on an op, they weren’t too thrilled but I just got back last week,” Natasha informs him, hiking Rose higher up on her hip. “They managed to reassign, at least. Anyway, I’m just reheating leftovers for dinner. That good with you?”

“Yeah, no problem,” Steve nods, bidding them a quick goodbye before making quick work of cleaning up their mess from their afternoon activities. He passes by his floor first to put Rose’s cards in safekeeping before coming back down to the floor he’s already made himself home in, making a beeline towards the bathroom and seeing Natasha just about to plop a paint-marked Rose into the tub.

“You alright here?” Natasha asks, and Steve simply rolls up his sleeves up to his elbows and sits down on the small stool next to the tub. “Don’t take too long.”

“I think there’s paint in her hair. I’ll try my best.”

Over the next few days, Steve carries around the large, folded card as discreetly as he can, having the team sign their messages on the back of the page when he catches them without Natasha within earshot.

“This is so sweet,” Wanda fawns over her little friend’s rendition of her, flattered at how slightly bigger she appeared on the paper compared to the rest of the team. “It is tomorrow, yes?”

“Yeah, Rosie couldn’t wait to give her these,” Steve nods, capping the pen she hands back and folding the card, tucking it under his arm. “It’s Nat’s first Mother’s day too, so we really want to make it special for her.”

“I’m sure it will be.”

Later on that evening, Steve hides the cards in one of the drawers in her room, and they go over their plan again in a hushed tone in case Natasha was listening on the other side of the door.

“So, course of action is I wake you up early so we can make her breakfast, and we knock on her door right after to bring it to her, and so you can give her your gifts.”

“An’ flowers?”

“The flowers will arrive tomorrow morning,” Steve nods. “You excited?”

“Mama’s gonna be so happy,” Rose grins, shuffling lower when Steve starts to tuck her into bed. “Are you sleepin’ over?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Okay,” Rose snuggles into her pillow. “Good night, Steve. Love you.”

“Love you too, sweetheart. Rest easy,” Steve smiles, kissing her cheek before leaving the room. He makes his way back to Natasha and settles on what he’s claimed to be his side of the bed, and she wastes no time in attaching herself to his side as soon as he settles under the covers.

“You two have gotten real close,” Natasha hums, nuzzling her nose into the crook of his arm. “Should I be jealous?”

“I’ve got enough love to go around,” Steve murmurs into her hair. “She’s definitely sweeter than you, though.”

Natasha pinches his side, making him jump mostly in surprise rather than pain, and Steve curls his arm around her shoulder and pulls her closer against him.

“Why do I even put up with you,” Natasha grumbles lightly, and Steve chuckles, turning on his side to wrap both his arms around her waist.

“Shh, sleep, Nat.”

Natasha huffs but soon relaxes in his hold, and the two drift off into a somewhat restful sleep until she hears a muffled but piercing scream in the wee hours of the morning, and before FRIDAY could alert them, she throws the covers off her body, making Steve wake up suddenly at the commotion. He snaps into full awareness when he sees Natasha darting towards Rose’s room, and he follows almost immediately after.

Natasha opens the door and finds Rose in an unfortunately familiar state—she was on her belly, letting out a guttural scream as she clutches her pillow, her back arching into the bed.

“Rosie,” Natasha sits down on one side of the bed, trying to reach for her hand but the little girl yanks it away as if she had been burned. “Baby, shh, Mama’s here. It’s okay.”

“Nat, what’s happening?” Steve sits on the other side, the thrashing child in between them. He’s seen Rose cry out in distress, has seen her withdraw into herself and become unresponsive, but he’s never seen her in this state and his heart wrenches at how much pain she must be in to react as violently as this.

Steve reaches out and hovers his hand over her back, eager to do something,  _anything_ ,  but as soon as his fingers brush the fabric, she screams again, trying to escape it as much as she can.

“Shit,” Natasha mutters, scooting lower on the bed to meet her daughter’s face. “She’s remembering again.”

“This isn’t the first time?”

“It hasn’t been this bad in a while,” Natasha supplies, brushing a damp lock of hair from her forehead, trying to ignore how she flinches at her touch. “Baby, wake up please. Listen to me. Mama’s here, Mama’s got you.”

“S-stop! Stop!” Rose cries, her pleas escalating into a screech, her fists balled tight enough for her fingernails to break the skin on her palm.

“Shh, baby, I know, I know,” Natasha murmurs close to her ear, loud enough to be heard over her cries, and Rose’s trembling form instinctively seeks her out, her head turning slightly to her side. “You’re at home with Mama, Steve’s here too. Could you wake up for us, please? C’mon, baby. It’ll be okay.”

“It's okay. We’ve got you, sweetheart,” Steve adds, mirroring Natasha’s position and laying down on his stomach as well in solidarity.

Rose’s cries carry on in full force, but ever so slowly, her sobs calm down enough that she stops thrashing, her fisted hands coming up and trying to slide them in through the neckline of her mother’s shirt.

“Shh, okay, okay,” Natasha soothes, quickly unbuttoning Rose’s pajama top that had been soaked through with sweat, ridding herself of her own shirt before gingerly lifting Rose to press her flush against her skin. “There we go, baby. Mama’s got you now.”

Steve sits up from his position and looks away respectfully as soon as Natasha had shucked her top off, but was forced to turn his head back when she asks him to cover the both of them with her security blanket at the foot of the bed.

“Atta girl, it’s alright,” Natasha carries on with whispering soothing words, her lips hovering over her temple. “Can you feel me? You’re home, baby. Mama’s holding you now, I won’t let anything happen to you.”

Rose lets out a shuddering sob, her wet face pressing into her breast as she hiccups out little whimpers, almost immediately brought back to reality at the heartbeat under her cheek and the warmth against her body. She slowly opens her palms and Steve scoots closer, taking her small hand in his and kissing the crescent moon wounds as gingerly as he can.

He rubs small circles on the back of her hand in hopes of calming her down further, and when he sees that she's starting to breathe normally, she burrows impossibly deeper against Natasha's hold, husking her name out almost desperately.

"M-mama, Mama, s-sorry," Rose chokes out, coughing slightly and Steve's hand immediately comes up to rub her back. "I-I—,"

"Shh, nothing to be sorry for," Natasha reassures her, but Rose shakes her head, sniffling loudly.

"I r-ruined it," Rose hiccups. "S'posed to s'prise you but I ruined it. S-sorry, Steve, sorry, Mama."

"What do you mean? You didn't ruin anything," Natasha says earnestly, turning her head to look up at Steve. "What's—,"

"We were planning on waking up early tomorrow to make you breakfast for Mother's day. She's been looking forward to it for days," Steve supplies easily, frowning when Rose makes a displeased sound. "But Rosie, sweetheart, you didn't ruin anything, okay? It's not your fault."

Natasha wants to say that she doesn't need such holiday, that it feels pointless to celebrate it, but she also doesn't want to discount their efforts and settles on wrapping her arms around her baby's back as tightly as she can.

"That's very thoughtful of you," Natasha whispers tenderly. "But I've got the little girl who made me a Mama, and everyday you tell me that you love me. What else could I want for?"

Rose preens at her words, snuffling slightly.

"You didn't ruin anything, baby girl, I'll still be here in the morning if you're so eager to make tomorrow special for me," Natasha reassures her, kissing her temple a few times. "I definitely wouldn't say no to Steve making us breakfast in bed, would you?"

"I want," Rose croaks out, her voice scratched raw. "Steve, can I give gift now?"

"Let me just grab them," Steve moves to stand up, but Natasha catches the back of his neck with her free hand and pulls him into a kiss.

"Thank you," Natasha whispers, her eyes meeting his, trying to convey everything else she couldn't say. Steve leans back down for another and caresses the back of Rose's head before quickly grabbing the cards from her room.

When he returns, he watches the pair interact for a short while before making his presence known. He sees Natasha tut at the small amount of dried blood that caked at Rose's palms, the little girl resting her head back over Natasha's breast and letting her finger trace over the puckered skin of the wound below her clavicle.

"Mother's day telegrams," Steve speaks softly, not wanting to break the solemnity of the moment, and Natasha lifts her head, a tired but bright smile on her face at the sight of the cards in his hands.

"Did you make all of these?" Natasha rubs her hand over Rose's back through the blanket, and she only nods, a small blush appearing on her cheeks. "So this is what you and Steve have been up to. I can't wait to see them."

Natasha sits up slightly, but keeps Rose flush against her as she goes through each card with the same amount of enthusiasm, grinning widely at the little messages inside.

"They're all beautiful, Rosie," Natasha hugs Rose tight, peppering her face with kisses and making her giggle softly. The little girl pulls her hand out from the blanket and grabs the large folded card, placing it in her hands. "What's this?"

"Open, Mama," Rose turns so her back was pressed against her front, making sure that the blanket was still over them. Natasha unfolds the card and couldn't help but let out a laugh, seeing her right smack in the middle with flaming red hair and her Rose perched on her hip.

Natasha could surprisingly identify most of them, and when she points at the pink heart over her head, Rose smiles shyly.

"It's Rose, Mama," Rose explains, and Natasha immediately feels tears well up in her eyes at the gesture. "She's a baby here but she's my big sister, right?"

"That's right," Natasha lets out a shaky exhale, trying to gather her bearings. "This is the best thing anyone's ever gotten me. Thank you, baby."

"Steve helped, look," Rose turns the large card around and Natasha is stunned at the blocks of writing in different penmanships, each of them telling her how wonderful of a mother she has been, and how grateful they are to have her on the team.

She knows that none of them are overly sentimental, making her cherish their messages even more.

"Happy Mother's day, Nat," Steve smiles, sitting closer to kiss her temple. "It's not how we intended your first one to go, but—," 

"I wouldn't have it any other way." 


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Natasha have their first date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A combination of prompts: "where nat tells rosie of rose" from dioncchusmic, and "first date for Steve and Nat" from youngerdrgrey.
> 
> Hope you enjoy! I quite like how this one turned out. Let me know what you think xx

“There were two sisters who lived by the sea.”

"With all the fishies?"

"Mm-hmm. Now hush, Mama's telling the story."

It had been around a month and a half since Natasha was recognized as Rose’s legal guardian, and she revels in every moment that she gets to spend with her daughter, trying her best to stay present and commit their daily interactions to memory. She allows her to express herself and acknowledges her feelings the way she had never been allowed to, and obliges in whatever catches the three year old’s fancy.

Natasha lies on her side, head propped on her elbow with her free hand resting on Rose’s stomach, rubbing small circles over the patterned blanket she’s claimed as hers.

“Their names were Rose and Pearl—,”

“Tha’s my name,” Rose interjects with a smile.

“That’s right. They did everything together, through the wind and rain, and sang songs as they gathered salt in the moonlight.”

Natasha’s voice is soothing, almost melodic as she carries on with her story, and just as she reaches the part where they reveal their true forms, Rose drowsily pulls her hand out from under the covers and wraps it around two of her fingers.

“Lila’s a sister, like Rose and Pearl?” Rose asks, a small yawn escaping her lips.

“Yeah, she’s Cooper’s and baby Nate’s sister,” Natasha explains, wiggling her fingers a bit before bringing them up to kiss the back of her hand.

“Are you a sister, Mama?”

“I...” Natasha takes a short moment to gather her thoughts. “There are people who think of me as their sister, and some I consider as mine.”

“Sister can be ‘nyone?”

“Anyone you consider as family, that’s correct,” Natasha confirms.

“Am I sister?”

“You are, in a way,” Natasha deflects lightly, stroking the back of her hand with her thumb. “Wanda definitely thinks of you as a little sister.”

“But am I sister like Lila is?”

Natasha’s breath hitches ever so slightly, and she forces herself not to tense up. For someone so young, Rose is incredibly perceptive.

“Yeah,” Natasha reveals, her tone solemn. “I had her a long time ago. You have the same name.”

“Rose?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“I have real sister? Where is she?” Rose, suddenly awake at this new information, almost sits up until Natasha tuts and coaxes her back down. “Mama, where’s she?”

“She’s not with us anymore,” Natasha settles with that, sighing softly. “She was only a baby when she passed away.”

“Like baby Nate?” Rose scoots a bit until her shoulder was brushing her mother’s shirt.

“Much smaller,” Natasha closes her eyes. “But she’s technically your big sister.”

Rose doesn’t speak, somehow sensing how somber the atmosphere had become. She simply turns on her side and nuzzles her face into her chest, hooking her arm over her waist.

“Why’d you ask?” Natasha follows up gently, even though she could infer that her story and her initial fascination with Nate had something to do with it.

“I want,” Rose whispers into her neck, and Natasha feels the little girl’s cheek warming over. “I still call her sister?”

“I think she’d like that very much,” Natasha smiles, swallowing thickly. Rose looks up and frowns at the tears that were starting to brim in the corner of her eyes.

“Sad, Mama?” Rose asks in a small voice, and Natasha, quick to soothe, holds her tight against her.

“Just a little bit,” Natasha murmurs with her lips brushing the top of her head. “But you help make me feel better.”

Rose preens at her words, latching on to Natasha as she finishes her story and they chat a bit more about their day before allowing her mother to tuck her back under the covers.

“Good night. Love you, Mama," Rose reminds her, just as she does every time before she goes to sleep, and it never fails to make Natasha's heart bloom tenfold. The three year old puckers her lips, tilting her face up.

"And I love you," Natasha smiles, leaning down to kiss her forehead, the tip of her nose, her left cheek then her right, before landing a final one on her lips. "Sweet dreams, baby."

The next morning, Natasha walks out of her room to prepare breakfast, and she was only mildly surprised to see Steve transferring sizzling sausages onto a plate.

“Morning, Nat,” Steve greets when he sees her in his line of sight as he sets the plate down. Natasha raises an eyebrow when her eyes land on the sliced fruit arranged to make a smiley face. “I, uh, got them fresh at the market after my run.”

“Mm-hmm,” Natasha leans her back against the counter. “Yesterday, it was croissants.”

“They had a pastry box sale, and you said Rosie finally got up the stairs without any help. Consider it a reward,” Steve defends, looking righteously indignant while wearing a bright yellow apron.

“You’ve been making us breakfast for the past week. Not that I don’t appreciate it, but is there something you want to tell me?”

“I guess I haven’t been very subtle, huh,” Steve rubs the back of his neck, suddenly uncertain. “I just want to make it clear that I’ve loved helping you out with taking care of Rosie.”

Natasha’s face falls slightly.

“Oh.”

She figures that this was him telling her that he was moving on from them, that he was finally done and had been buttering them up every morning to soften the blow. She’s kept him at arm’s length for this very reason, and even though she’s anticipated this outcome, she chides herself for never wanting it to end.

“You better leave when she wakes up, then,” Natasha tries to keep her voice neutral, but her eyes narrow at the wide eyed look on his face. “You cannot just do this for a week only to tell me that you’re finished playing house.”

“Wait, Nat, I’m not...God, I’m really bad at this,” Steve moves forward, quickly taking her hand and doesn’t reach for it again when she yanks it away. “Like I said, before you so rudely jumped to conclusions—,”

“Digging yourself a real nice hole there, Rogers.”

“I meant to say that I’ve loved taking care of her, and I was wondering if I could do that for you,” Steve finally blurts out.

“What?”

“I want to take care of you too. I want...I mean, would you like to go out? With me?” Steve stammers, a light blush tinging the tips of his ears.

“I...”

“You don’t have to answer me right now, and we don’t have to go out to anywhere fancy because I know you don’t trust anyone to watch over Rosie yet,” Steve quickly offers. “I’ll cook, we could just stay in, and we’d include her. Not that I’m expecting more dates with just the two of us, and I know it’s not conventional, but—,”

“You’ve really thought about this,” Natasha muses, eyes twinkling at his thoughtfulness.

“Have been for a while. I...I really like you, Nat,” Steve reaches for her hand again, and when she doesn’t pull away, gives it a soft squeeze. “And I’d like to show you, the both of you, that I’m in this for the long haul.”

“Steve, I—,” Natasha gets cut off by the sound of tiny feet pattering against the floor. “Have to get her. We’ll talk later?”

“Yeah, of course.”

Natasha closes the distance between her and her slowly approaching daughter, crouching down just as she presses her face into her shoulder drowsily.

“Good morning, baby,” Natasha smiles, kissing the back of her head.

“Still s’eepy, Mama,” Rose yawns. “Up.”

“We slept a bit later than usual, didn’t we,” Natasha hums, picking her up in her arms and holding her flush against her. “Look, Steve here made you a special breakfast. Do you want to see?”

Rose turns her head to look but rests her cheek on her mother’s shoulder, lifting her hand up a bit to give him a small wave.

“Hey, Rosie,” Steve greets, waving right back.  


Natasha sets Rose down on her chair and she brightens slightly at the banana grin, raspberry eyes, and apple slice eyebrows. “Smiley, Mama! Look!”

“Yeah, Steve made that for you,” Natasha confirms. Rose quickly reaches out to grab an apple slice and proceeds to feed herself, foregoing her utensils.

“There’s more fruit in the fridge if she wants, by the way,” Steve informs Natasha, sitting down on the seat across the two of them. She only nods, placing two sausages and a few spoonfuls of scrambled eggs on a separate plate, setting it in front of Rose before serving herself.

They converse about the mission briefing from a few days ago, both of them slightly relieved that they hadn’t been assigned to fieldwork, purposefully skirting around Steve’s loaded question until all the food’s done and Natasha allowing Rose to play in the living room for a while.

“Rosie doesn’t like overly spiced food," Natasha tells him casually as she washes the dishes with Steve drying and placing them back in the cupboards. “Or things with strong tastes. She liked those sausages, though. I thought she wouldn’t.”

Steve doesn’t respond, not wanting to interrupt her sudden train of thought. He simply listens, takes note.

“She has nightmares and times when she feels like she’s still there in the facility. It sometimes takes me hours to pull her out of her head,” Natasha takes a deep breath. “She still doesn’t comprehend how a lot of things work just yet, and I’m trying my best to teach her that not everything is dangerous, as hypocritical that may sound.”

“I understand,” Steve deflates a bit. “But I told you that—,”

“I’m not done,” Natasha wipes the rim of the sink one final time before turning to face him. “I’m just saying that even if we do try this, she’s always going to be my first priority, Steve. And I need you to know that as early as now.”

“And I’ve been aware of that since the moment you took her in,” Steve puts the last plate back in the cupboard before giving her his full attention. “And I’m not asking you to choose. I’m just asking if I could be a more...permanent part of your life, if you’ll have me.”

“I’m your second in command, you couldn’t get rid of me if you tried,” Natasha smirks, and Steve humors her, chuckling as well.

“You know what I mean,” Steve bumps her shoulder with his. “Is that a yes?”

“We can do tomorrow evening, that work with you?” Steve nods, and Natasha adds impishly, “Your place or mine?”

“Very funny,” Steve huffs lightly. “But my floor, just to change things up a bit. Come by at around seven?”

“We’ll see you by then.”

As promised, Natasha, clad in loungewear with Rose dressed similarly in a purple pyjama set, make their way up to Steve’s floor the next evening just a few minutes before seven, and Rose, despite being slightly familiar with the area, attaches herself to her mother’s hip as they step out of the elevator.

“There you both are,” Steve smiles from his spot in the kitchen, looking fully at home in a light pullover and sweatpants with a dish towel slung over his shoulder. Rose looks up at Natasha as if asking permission and before she could nod, she makes her way to Steve across the floor, wrapping her arms around his thigh. “Hi there.”

“Hi,” Rose steps both her feet over one of his, and giggles when he walks around, clinging to his leg securely as he moves. “More!”

“Do you need any help?” Natasha offers, and Steve shakes his head, lifting his leg a bit higher and eliciting a squeal from the three year old.

"Oh no, I've got it, you can wait at the table," Steve chuckles, and he lifts Rose up into his arms after throwing her slightly in the air, a loud peal of giggles filling the room. "That includes you, Rosebud."

"Rosebud?" Natasha quirks an eyebrow at the new nickname.

"It fits," Steve only shrugs before turning his head to the girl in question. "How'd you like that? Can I call you Rosebud?"

"I like," Rose agrees, kicking her feet slightly against his side until he puts her down on the floor.

Natasha complies with a small smile, allowing him to take the lead for the night. She sees the table set for three people, and she doesn't miss how he's placed cushions on the chair at the head of the table, and how she even has a pink plastic wine glass by the upper right side of her plate.

"Mama, look," Rose picks up her glass and holds it up close to hers. "Same!"

"And it's pink, too," Natasha agrees, admiring the fact that he's gone as far as procuring a child-friendly goblet so she would feel more included.

Steve arrives a few minutes later with two large serving platters with pasta and salad, setting it down on the table before bringing back a dutch oven, setting it in between him and Natasha before sitting back down.

"I thought a pot roast and spaghetti would be safe options," Steve looks slightly flustered, and he hates that it wasn't from the heat from the kitchen. He takes the lid off the dutch oven and the aromatic smell of the brisket immediately wafts through the air.

"That smells amazing," Natasha hums, inhaling deeply. "I knew you cooked, but I never pegged you for a chef."

"It kept me occupied, and food's more flavorful now than before," Steve smiles, but still slightly uncomfortable with the praise. "But I'm glad I got your approval."

Natasha adds a bit of pasta and shreds some brisket into manageable pieces on Rose's plate, while Steve leaves the table briefly to grab two bottles from the kitchen.

"I found this sparkling grape juice, thought it would be fun," Steve pours a bit into Rose's pink wine glass, and lets her taste it first before he adds a bit more.

"And merlot for the both of us," Steve squints his eyes as he reads the label, pouring halfway into Natasha's glass and his. "Can I be honest, though? Tony gave this as a gift. I have no idea about wines."

"You can't get drunk, correct?" Natasha asks, swirling her glass slightly and waits for his nod of confirmation. "Then it's not important. You can drink for the taste, though, I'm sure no one really drinks for that purpose."

"Fair enough," Steve raises his glass, and Natasha follows suit. "To firsts."

"To firsts," Natasha clinks her glass with his, and they let Rose toast with them as well the second time around.

As soon as they finish dinner, Steve hands Rose a small bowl of vanilla ice cream which she immediately falls in love with at the first taste. Halfway through, Natasha notices Rose's eyes starting to droop, her grip starting to go slack around the spoon.

"Hey, baby, you're already sleepy?" Natasha chuckles, using a napkin to wipe around her daughter's mouth. "I'll get you ready for bed in a bit, okay?"

"Okay. I fi-I finish," Rose drawls out, spooning a bit more into her mouth while fighting to stay awake.

"I've never seen anyone so determined to finish dessert before," Steve comments, clearly amused at the sight before him. As soon as she puts her spoon down, he's surprised when she reaches towards him, her hands opening and closing as Natasha wipes her face again.

"Hold," Rose almost whines, and he reaches over to pick her up and press her against him. She sighs contentedly, resting her head on his chest as she swiftly nods off to sleep.

"I can bring her down," Natasha reaches for her daughter, but Steve takes a small step back instead.

"I've...I've been clearing out the spare room just so she has a place to stay or nap when she's here," Steve tells her in a hushed tone, and when he sees a hint of a smile, he presses on. "Can we put her there until you both are ready to go down? Because I don't think I'm ready for this night to end."

"I'm glad we're on the same page, then."

Natasha opens the door to the guest bedroom and pulls the sheets down, allowing Steve to lay her down there before taking over with tucking her in and giving her a kiss goodnight. They return back to the table and each have another serving of the pot roast, as well as a glass of wine.

"This has been wonderful," Natasha starts, her finger tracing over the rim of her glass. "Really. I don't think I've eaten this well in a long while."

"I'm glad to hear," Steve smiles easily, though his stomach is in knots, waiting for the  _but_ to drop. "I'll be happy to cook like this for you more often."

"I'd have to train twice as long, then," Natasha smirks, but her eyes are thoughtful. Genuine. "I don't need grand gestures, just so you know."

"Like breakfast for a week?"

"That one was convenient, I'll give you that," Natasha narrows her eyes playfully at him. "If you're asking me what I want out of this if we do try this out, I just want you to keep doing what you've promised to do the first day she came to us. Just keep showing up for her."

"I have, and I will. You have my word," Steve nods seriously. "What about you?"

"What about me?"

"I love that you're always putting Rosie first, it goes to show what a great mother you've become," Steve praises, and Natasha hides her blush as she sips from the glass. "But someone needs to take care of you too, and I'm more than happy to give that to you if you'll let me."

"I can take care of myself," Natasha tells him bluntly, not in retaliation but rather as a matter of fact, and he only nods. "But I have to admit, I've grown rather fond of you."

"That's...that's a good thing, right?"

"I'd like to think so," Natasha nods, and she can't help but laugh at the boyish looking grin on his face. "I'm willing to give this a shot."

"Thank you," Steve's cheeks are starting to hurt, but he doesn't care one bit. He's got a chance.

"I promise, I won't let my best girls down."


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one else was available to babysit Rose. Enter Peter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thought it would be a cute idea. x

It’s finally the weekend.

As soon as the bell rings for dismissal, Peter rushes out through the doors. He passes by the deli for his regular post-school snack and was ready to patrol for the rest of the afternoon until his phone buzzes, and his palms immediately sweat when he sees the caller ID.

“H’llo?” Peter greets through a mouthful of hotdog. “M’ster Stark?”

“Happy’ll be there in a few to bring you to the compound. Pack a bag,” Tony’s voice is clear and relaxed through the speaker, if not laced with a hint of urgency.

Peter chews as fast as he can to clear his throat. “I’m heading back home right now. How many days are we going? Do I need my suit? Wait, didn’t you say—,”

“Kid, slow down—,”

Peter can feel himself buzzing with excitement, talking a mile a minute as he rushes to the apartment with a small skip in his step. “What’s the plan, Mr. Stark? I promise I won’t let you down.”

“Alright. You wanna prove to me you’re trustworthy?” Tony chuckles slightly before clearing his throat and Peter could make out a few voices in the background. “Four days tops.”

“But I have school on Monday.”

“I’ll write a note or something,” Tony huffs, before muttering a muffled ‘ow’ away from the phone. “This is really important, kid.”

“Do I need my suit?” Peter asks again, unlocking the door and heading straight to his room.

“Nah, you won’t,” Tony pauses for a second. “But bring your toys. Those would be helpful.”

He hates how cryptic this conversation is, but it also sends a thrill down his spine—he’s being let in to something confidential and he preens at the prospect of it.

“Like...my tech?”

“Don’t make me spell it out for you,” Tony sighs deeply. “Don’t you still play with Legos?”

“Mr. Staaark,” Peter almost whines. “I don’t play with Legos. I make scale models with them, it’s different.”

“Sure, whatever you say, I don’t have the ti—just be here in the next hour,” Peter could imagine him pinching the bridge of his nose. He doesn’t realize that Tony’s already hung up the phone since he was too busy throwing a few days worth of clothes and his suit, just in case, into a backpack. He grabs his container of legos and tucks it under his arm, shooting a quick message to Aunt May that he’ll be staying at the compound for an extended project as he makes his way down and into the car waiting for him.

Meanwhile, at the compound, as soon as Tony gets off the phone, Steve and Natasha were just about ready to shoot holes into the back of his skull.

“He’s not babysitting Rose,” Natasha grits out, arms crossed over her chest. “Do you really think I’ll let some random kid you picked up watch mine for a week?”

“And you know she doesn’t do well with strangers,” Steve adds. “You’ve never even introduced him to us. I don’t care how good this kid is, I’m siding with Nat on this one.”

“Alright, Mom and Dad, who’s your next option then? No one from the team can sit this one out, and I’m only trying to help,” Tony bristles at their defensiveness before softening just a hair. “Look, I trust this kid. He’s got a good head on his shoulders and I wouldn’t call him if I didn’t want him around Rosie.”

“Do you have a file on him?” Natasha asks, and with a wave of his hand, Peter Parker’s profile appears on the holographic screen in front of them. She and Steve skim through the document and raises an eyebrow at his current occupation. “Since when did you start accepting interns?” 

“The point is, we’ve got a babysitter—you’re welcome, by the way—he’ll be here in a while so we can let the two kids meet and we can finally go,” Tony deflects as he pushes himself away from the table. “You want me to bring him up to you?”

“Common area,” Steve says quickly, his shoulders still tense. “Nat?”

“We’ll bring her there first before we give him access to our floor,” Natasha agrees immediately. “How many minutes?”

“Thirty tops.”

They part ways, Tony moving around the table to add last minute upgrades to his suit while the two go back up to their floor, opening the elevator to a pair of voices, one more distressed than the other.

“Calm down, malyshka,” Wanda attempts to soothe, Rose on her hip and a hand gently stroking her back. The little girl whines feebly against her neck, tears rolling down her cheeks and onto her leather jacket.

“What happened?” Natasha asks, moving towards the pair in the living room and Rose whines at the sound of her mother’s voice, quickly straightening up and reaching for her. “Shh, baby. It’s okay.”

“She woke up from her nap and thought you two had left without saying goodbye,” Wanda reveals, a small frown on her face. “I told her where you were but she wanted to see for herself.”

“Oh, no,” Natasha laments as she sways slightly. “We’d never leave without telling you, Rosie. Can you remember that for us?”

Rose only nods, sniffling loudly. “Still goin’, Mama?”

“Unfortunately,” Natasha tells her sadly, stroking her back.

“And Daddy?”

“Yeah, Rosebud,” Steve steps forward and looks at her over Natasha’s shoulder, wiping her tears away with his thumb. “But it’ll only be a few days. Three sleeps.”

“Can I come?” 

Steve takes her from Natasha’s hold and hugs her tight before settling her on his hip. “You know you can’t, sweetheart, but we’ll be home as soon as we can.”

“We gon’—we still gon’ go to zoo when you get back, right? You p’omised,” Rose looks down, her little finger tracing the outline of the star on his chest.

“We did, and we will,” Natasha reassures, kissing her cheek. “We’ll spend the whole day there and we’ll see all your favorite animals. Just you, me, and Daddy.”

Wanda watches on, smiling softly at the small family in front of her.

“An’ Wanda?” Rose asks shyly, resting her ear against Steve’s chest but her shiny eyes are directed towards her. “Can Wanda come too, Mama?”

“Of course she can,” Natasha agrees, looking at Wanda for confirmation.

“I...” Wanda doesn’t want to impose, doesn’t want to insert herself where she doesn’t belong, but Natasha only smiles encouragingly and her heart feels like it’s about to burst at the easy acceptance. “I would love to.”

“Great. So—,” Natasha gets cut off by FRIDAY chiming in to let them know that Peter was already at the lobby. She shares a look with Steve before forcing their feet to enter the elevator, Wanda hot on their heels. “Wanda, straight to the quintjet. We just need to meet with the new sitter.”

The girl quickly complies, stepping off the elevator first before they make their way back up to the communal area. The three of them sit on the couch with Rose settled sideways on Steve’s lap, his arms around her making her appear that much smaller. Natasha sits close enough to hold her daughter’s hand, allowing her to fiddle with her fingers.

Tony spots them first, their backs turned to him with Rose completely hidden from view, and he curses internally as soon as Peter opens his mouth.

“Woah, real nice place you got here, Mr. Stark, I’ve never been to this part of the—,” Peter puts his belongings down and he cuts himself off as soon as his eyes land on the two avengers sitting a few feet away from him. He hears a faint whimper and they immediately tend to the one who made the noise.

“Told you not to talk so loud,” Tony mutters, clapping his hand over his shoulder.

“Sorry,” Peter whispers, sucking his lips into a thin line.

He watches Tony sit on the coffee table in front of them, and he takes a few steps to the side to get a better look, forcing his jaw not to go slack at what he sees. Of everything he imagined, he never expected a small child hiding into Captain America’s chest with Black Widow closely by his side.

He observes them from this distance, not wanting to overstep any boundaries at this point, and he tries his best to tune out the conversation but at the mention of him, he couldn’t help himself.

“Kid’s here,” Tony says, and Tony and Natasha give him a similar look of disdain. “Yeah, he’s chatty. Can’t really do anything about that.”

“Figures,” Natasha hums, feeling Rose squeeze two of her fingers.

“Hey there, Ro. Wanna go to Uncle Tones for a bit?” Tony tries not to look hurt when he sees her shake her head against Steve’s chest, curling into herself.

Undeterred, he tries a different tactic. “Ro, I’ve got someone here I want you to meet. Would you like to—,”

“No,” Rose whines petulantly, her eyes screwed shut. “No, thank ‘ou.”

“She just woke up from her nap,” Natasha explains simply, not wanting to reveal the full truth. She checks her watch and tuts quietly, gently holding Rose’s hand and squeezing back. “Hey, baby, can you try for Mama? You might like Uncle Tony’s friend.”

Peter’s eyes bug out slightly at her words, his mind immediately trying to process the timeline of events but before he could go further off tangent, Tony calls his name and tells him to sit next to him on the coffee table.

“Hi, um, Mr. Stark invited me. I’m Peter, Peter Parker. Nice to meet you, Mr. Captain America, sir, and Miss Widow—Romanoff, ma’am,” Peter stammers over his words, holding his hand out but pulls it back immediately when he notices that both their hands were occupied.

“Call me Steve, you know Natasha,” Steve tries to ease the teenager’s nerves, knowing how quickly the four year old in his arms picks up on tension. “And this little one here is Rose.”

“Rosie, Daddy,” Rose corrects him softly, and Steve couldn’t resist letting out a chuckle.

“Oh, sorry. Rosie, I mean,” Steve smiles, and the energy in the room suddenly feels lighter somehow. Despite the tender look on his face, he eyes Peter skeptically. “I know it’s short notice. Thanks for coming by so fast.”

“It’s no problem at all,” Peter senses their discomfort, and he understands, really; he’d be hesitant to entrust his secret kid to someone they’ve just met, too. “Hi Rosie. I’m Mr. St—Tony’s...friend.”

Rose turns her head to look at him, sniffling a bit. She doesn’t say anything, simply stares, and a soft blush tinges her cheeks before wriggling a bit and reaching out for Natasha.

“Mama,” Rose whispers, her eyes curious but still slightly wary at the young stranger. Natasha plucks her from Steve’s lap and transfers her to hers, smoothing her hair down. She straightens up a bit to whisper in her mother’s ear. “He’s pretty.” 

Natasha laughs heartily, squeezing her tight. Steve’s eyes almost bug out of their sockets, and Peter feels blood rushing to his ears.

“He is, isn’t he?” Natasha teases, nuzzling her cheek. Steve grips Natasha’s knee.

“Ro, you’re killing your old man over here,” Tony laughs at how Steve locks his jaw, forcing himself to relax. Rose reaches down and touches her father’s hand, wrapping hers around two of his fingers.

“You’re pretty too, Daddy,” Rose offers, trying to ease his tension.

“Not exactly what I’m worried about, Rosebud, but thank you,” Steve chuckles, softening slightly.

“Ten minutes,” Natasha murmurs near his ear, and he only nods, turning his full attention to Peter.

“You will be allowed access to our floor, and you will be staying in the guest bedroom while we’re gone so you can keep a close eye on Rosie,” Steve starts, and Peter immediately wonders if he should bring out a pad to write this information down. “We’ve left a note with FRIDAY detailing anything you might need, and we’ve put down our numbers there in case of emergencies.”

“Do you know how to cook?” Natasha asks, and Peter nods a little too quickly.

“I know enough,” Peter overcompensates. “We mostly do takeout since my Aunt isn’t home often. But I’m a fast learner.”

“When in doubt, ask FRIDAY for help,” Natasha continues. “And do not hesitate to call us should anything bad happen.”

“I’ve babysat for my cousins and the kid that lives a few doors down from me. I have experience, you have nothing to worry about,” Peter tells them earnestly, wanting to impress them a bit. “And I promise to call and leave updates. I can send pictures too, if you want.”

“That...would be nice,” Natasha says thoughtfully. She’s never thought to ask whenever anyone from the team would watch over her. She checks the time again and sighs deeply. “We need to get going.”

Rose frowns deeply, shifting to straddle Natasha’s waist and lock her arms around her neck.

“Home quick, Mama,” Rose whispers under her jaw, and Natasha pulls away a bit to pepper kisses over her face, making her giggle at the sensation.

“Oh, there’s my girl,” Natasha matches her smile, kissing her squarely on the lips. “We’ll be home quick, baby. Be good for Peter.”

“Always good, Mama,” Rose nods, feeling herself being lifted away and back to her father’s arms. “Home quick, Daddy.”

“As quick as we can,” Steve kisses her cheek soundly. “You want to give Uncle Tony a bit of good luck?”

Before Tony could process it, Steve was transferring Rose into his arms and even though he sees and interacts with her daily, he’s never had to carry her before. He holds her a bit tighter than she’s comfortable with, but she doesn’t protest.

“Don’t get hurt, Unc’ Tony. Okay?” Rose has her hands on both of his cheeks, patting them lightly. Tony looks into her earnest eyes and he knows that he’d promise her the world if she asked.

“I won’t, bambina,” Tony answers tightly, hugging her close before putting her down. “Alright. Let’s go.”

Natasha forces herself not to look back as they make their way out, knowing in her gut that she’d try to find an excuse to stay the minute she sees her daughter’s distraught face watching them go—she’s done this countless of times, but but never gets any easier.

Soon enough, Rose and Peter are finally alone, standing awkwardly in the middle of the room.

“So, Rosie, what do you wanna do?” Peter asks, looking down and he blanches when he looks down and finds that she’s not by his side. “Rosie?” 

He quickly scans the room and breathes a sigh of relief when he finds her walking towards the elevator. He rushes towards her, grabbing the hem of her shirt and gently pulling her back.

“Where are you going?”

“M’room,” Rose mumbles, scuffing the floor with her shoe. “Down, p’ease.”

“Oh, uh, alright,” Peter grabs his backpack and the container before following her inside the elevator. She pushes the button and they descend down to their floor, the little girl immediately scuttling off to her room and closing the door behind her.

They were off to a great start. 

He figures he’d let her adjust to having him around on her own terms, and familiarizes himself with the floor layout as well as settling into the guest bedroom to pass the time.

“FRIDAY, could you pull up that note they left?” Peter asks, sitting down on the couch in the living room. He hears a ping from the tablet on the side table and his eyes widen slightly at the several pages of information. “Hey, Fri? Are you sure this is it?”

“Affirmative.”

_The car pulls up to the driveway of the Avenger’s Compound, and he almost immediately bounds out and in through the doors, ecstatic to finally be utilized after being discovered by his hero._

_“Hey, Mr. Stark! I’ve brought these like you asked, not sure how they’ll be useful, though,” Peter greets as soon as he’s within earshot of Tony, lifting the translucent box for him to see. “When do we leave?”_

_“We will be leaving in half an hour,” Tony rests his hand on the back of his neck as they begin to walk. “You, on the other hand, will be staying here.”_

_ “What? Come on, wh—,” Peter’s brain short circuits, stopping mid-step. “You’re telling me that the important thing you need me to do is  babysitting ? Mr. Stark, that’s so not cool. Who am I even watching over, none of you have children yet!” _

_“Listen—,”_

_“I mean, I understand that you’d want to keep your kid away from the public because—,”_

_“You’re not just watching over any kid, Pete,” Tony interjects before he could say anything else. “You’re watching family, and I don’t ever take that lightly. I asked you if you can prove to me you’re trustworthy, and this is the best way you can show me that you are. Understand?”_

_“Yes, sir.”_

_As they make their way up to the common area, Peter resists the urge to fill in the silence with conversation._

_“Try not to talk too loud when you come in, she’s doesn’t like that,” Tony tells him offhandedly, and Peter shifts a bit beside him. “And I put in a good word for you with her parents, which is no easy feat, by the way.”_

_“Oh, I—,”_

_“We’re here,” Tony ushers him out of the elevator. “Turn up the charm, Pete. Let’s go.”_

Peter suddenly feels underprepared, the feeling only growing as soon as he arrives to the part of the note detailing previous trauma and triggers. He’s scared shitless at how much responsibility this kid apparently is, but he’s nothing if not thorough. He’s more than aware that that they took a gamble on him, and he needed to earn his keep.

He reaches the final page of the note listing their numbers and who to reach when they’re not immediately available, adding them to his contact list. He quickly creates a group chat with Steve and Natasha, letting them know that it was him before setting his phone down.

He hears a knob click and turns his head to the sound, spotting Rose peeking through the small slat of opening she’s made.

“Hey, Rosie,” Peter greets, beckoning her to come over. She gasps a bit at being spotted, but she opens the door a bit wider and shyly shuffles towards him, a blanket trailing behind her. Her eyes land on the translucent container on the coffee table and she gently pokes it with her finger. “Oh, Tony told me to bring this. You wanna see?”

Rose nods once, and Peter sits on the floor, pulling the container to his lap so she could see it better. As soon as he takes off the lid, he beams at how her eyes brighten at the sight.

“Lego!” Rose whispers almost reverently, clearly excited. “I have, too. S’my favorite. Look.”

Rose pulls out a basket from the bottom of the bookshelf, dragging it towards him with surprising strength. She puts it in front of him and he sees a full basket filled with larger lego bricks made for children. “See? I have too!” 

“Woah, that’s so cool, we’re the same!” Peter says enthusiastically. “Do you wanna play?”

Rose nods, proceeding to dump all the contents of the basket onto the floor and giggles at the gasp Peter makes. She slowly warms up to him and eventually comes to enjoy his company as the hours pass; she likes that he doesn’t mind when she builds quietly, and appreciates the compliments he throws her way every time she shows him a new creation, allowing him to take a picture of each and every one. 

Time seems to pass quickly, both of them not realizing it was starting to get dark outside. He hears Rose’s stomach grumble, and even though the little girl doesn’t pay much attention to it, he checks his watch with a slightly panicked look and scrambles to his feet.

“Dinner time, Rosie,” Peter holds his hand out for her to take, but Rose ignores it, leaving the mess of legos in the living room and opted to follow him to the kitchen instead. “What do you wanna have?”

He lifts her up to sit on the barstool, and he only receives a shrug in response.

“Stay here,” Peter quickly grabs the tablet from the living room, skimming through the note they’ve left behind. “Try to keep meals as balanced as possible. She does not do well with strongly flavored foods, and has a minute allergy to shellfish.”

Peter looks through the fridge and finds it fully stocked with fresh produce, but he wrinkles his nose and turns back to see Rose sitting patiently, little feet swinging back and forth.

“I promise to look for recipes tonight,” Peter says as he closes the fridge, leaning over the counter to meet her eyes. “But how’s about a weekend dinner treat? Let’s get some takeout.”

“Takeout?” Rose parrots. “Don’t like Chinese food, Mama and Daddy get that a lot.”

“There’s lots of different things you can takeout, not just Chinese,” Peter explains. “I think I’m in the mood for something greasy. Maybe shawarma? Or burgers. Oh, burgers and fries sound really good right now.”

“Fries?” Rose straightens up considerably, ears perking up at the word. She’s had them only a couple of times with her Daddy making them from scratch—she’d always sneak a few from the plate when he’s not looking.

“Yes, fries! Have you ever tried dipping them in a milkshake? That’s the best,” Peter hums, his mouth almost watering at the thought of it. When Rose cocks her head to the side, he shakes his head in mock disappointment. “Oh, young Padawan. I have so much to teach you.”

Peter brings Rose with him to pick their order up at the lobby, and once they’re back on the floor, they sit side by side at the dining table. He pulls a box out from a paper bag, placing it in front of her.

“This, Rosie, is a Happy Meal,” Peter explains as he pulls out the other orders from the bag. Rose kneels on the chair and tentatively opens the top, pulling out the plastic encased toy with a small, surprised gasp. “There it is, that’s the happy part.”

“Mine?” Rose asks, holding it out from him to see. Peter only nods, tearing the plastic to reveal a small porcupine figurine in a black top and a red skirt. “Wha’s this?”

“It’s a porcupine. She’s a character from that new movie, we can watch it this weekend,” Peter explains, taking out the nuggets from the box before unwrapping his burger. “Here, try these. Chicken nuggets.”

Rose eyes them warily, but still takes one from the box and sniffs it before nibbling on the edge. She takes a larger experimental bite and hums at the taste.

“It’s good, right?” Peter asks through a mouthful of his own burger. Rose only nods, reaching for another one. She spots the fries and she reaches over for them, shoving a few in her mouth. “That’s the spirit, Rosie. Oh, wait, I got an idea.”

He dips the ends of four short fries into ketchup and teaches her to slip two of them beneath her upper lip with him doing the same. She giggles wildly at the sight, and he quickly takes a picture of her vampire fry-fangs before taking another with the two of them in the frame.

They eventually finish up with dinner, Peter successfully converting the four year old to the fry-milkshake combo life, and when he sees her eyes starting to droop, he figures it was time to get her ready for bed.

“Do you need help washing up, or...” Peter trails off, and Rose nods shyly. “Alright. Lead the way.”

Rose brings him to her room, and he takes in the modest decorations, not at all looking like how he imagined a four year old’s room would—he thought the bed would be smaller, and the walls would be much, much brighter. He spots a large dollhouse in the corner near her bed and a shelf filled to the brim with children’s books, a small rug and a beanbag on the floor next to it. A table is placed on the opposite side of the bookshelf, and he smiles at the myriad of drawings taped above it.

He allows Rose to pull out her own pajamas, slightly surprised that he lets her choose, and they make their way to the bathroom right after. Peter helps her undress and he has to reign in the anger that floods through his veins at the sight of the scars that marred her back.

“Jesus,” Peter mutters under his breath. He forces his hands not to shake as he helps her into the tub, and makes quick work of getting her cleaned before dressing her up.

He brushes her hair before settling her under the covers, remembering to place her security blanket over her. “You alright here?”

Rose only nods, turning to her side and it doesn’t take long for her to drift into a a peaceful sleep. Peter tiptoes out of the room, cleaning up the rest of the paper bags on the dining table and the mess in the living room before settling down in the guest bedroom.

He opens the group chat and presses record audio.

“Hi, so, just wanted to update you on what we did today,” Peter leans back against the headboard. “We played with legos and had Mcdonalds for dinner—it’s the weekend and I thought it would be a nice treat, y’know—and I’m looking up some easy meals that we can do for the next few days. Rosie’s been asleep for around an hour or so, and I’m just staying awake for a little while longer in case she gets up.”

He releases the record button and it sends immediately, and he follows it up with, “A bunch of pictures coming your way. She’s a really great kid, barely gave me any trouble. Hope you and the team stay safe out there!”

He sends the pictures of Rose’s lego creations, a few videos of her explaining what they were, and the solo vampire fry-fang picture, keeping the one of the both of them to himself.

Peter stays on his laptop for a while before finally resolving to get under the covers to sleep at around midnight. Just as he plugs his phone to the charger, a notification from Steve and Natasha appears. He noticed that they’ve both reacted with a heart to the fries picture, and when he scrolls down, he smiles at the message.

**Thanks for the update, Peter. Good job. :)**


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The little family takes a trip to the zoo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As requested by several of you, here’s part two to the last chapter! x

“Could you let me know if we have homework tomorrow?”

Peter has his phone wedged between his ear and his shoulder as he mixes the batter, throwing a few glances at Rose who was adding muffin liners to a tray. He pauses to give her a thumbs up before finally setting the bowl down.

“What’s in it for me?” He hears Ned snicker on the other line. “You’ve turned down hanging out this weekend and you wouldn’t even tell me what you’re up to.”

“Trust me, you wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” Peter chuckles, snipping off a corner of the bag of chocolate chips before handing it to Rose. He bites back a laugh when she holds it up dutifully, waiting for more instruction. “Go ahead, put ‘em in!”

“Put what in?” Ned asks, and Peter’s eyes widen.

“Nothing. Just text me if anything important happens, okay?” Peter makes him promise, and puts the phone down as soon as he gets clear confirmation. He breathes a small sigh of relief, turning his attention to his small companion and she freezes when she gets caught with a handful of chocolate chips midway to her mouth.

“And what do you think you’re doing?” Peter mocks anger, but Rose panics slightly, cowering at the tone and stepping down from the stool. She was just about to scamper off until he catches her by the hem of her shirt and crouches down to her level. “Hey, hey, Rosie. I’m only joking, it’s okay.”

“Don’t get mad, m’sorry,” Rose apologizes, eyes wide. “Don’t tell Mama or Daddy, please.”

“I’m not mad, I promise,” Peter reassures her with a big smile, rubbing her arm. “See? Not mad at all. And you’re supposed to sneak chocolate chips when no one’s looking, it’s practically law.”

“Really?” Rose sniffles, and Peter only nods, guiding her back to the step stool.

He takes her closed fist and gently opens it to reveal the semi-melted chips. “Do you need help washing this off?”

“I can,” Rose tells him, leaning a bit to her left to turn the faucet, washing her hands the best she’s able to. “Can...can I still help?”

“Of course! It’s your idea, after all,” Peter smiles easily, helping her pour a more than generous amount of chocolate chips into the batter. “I’m sure the team’ll be excited to know you made these for them.”

“Not jus’ me, also you!” Rose corrects.

“I guess I can take a bit of credit,” Peter shrugs, popping a few chocolate chips into his mouth when he’s sure that she’s looking, allowing her to take a few herself with much less trepidation than earlier. “You wanna mix them in this time?”

While they wait for the muffins to bake, Peter gets started on dinner, boiling pasta and heating pre-made tomato sauce from the jar. He remembers a tip from his deep Pinterest dive the night before and minces carrots and celery into fine squares before adding them to the sauce. He hears a bell ding and he turns around, swiftly putting on the oven mitts.

“Timer’s done!” Rose chirps from her place at the counter, coloring a giraffe from an activity book to keep herself occupied. 

“I know, let’s see how these turned out,” Peter pulls out the tray of chocolate chip muffins from the oven and placing the next batch in, the delectable smell immediately wafting through the air. Rose hums appreciatively, and Peter places it just a bit out of arm’s reach from the four year old as a precaution. “They look pretty good to me. High five, Rosie!”

Rose eagerly returns it with a small giggle. Peter warns her first about not touching the tray before pulling their dinner together, draining the water from the pasta before mixing it straight into the saucepan. He sets two bowls and some utensils on the counter before adding a good portion into the both of them.

“It’s a bit hot, Rosie,” Peter reminds her, and she blows on the penne on her fork before taking her bites. “S’it good?”

“Mmhmm,” Rose nods, steadily polishing off her bowl. “More?”

“Love the appetite today,” Peter grins, remembering to add that detail in his daily updates. He spoons another helping into her bowl and as soon as he finishes with his much larger portion, he eats the remains straight from the saucepan. “You wanna try a muffin after this?”

“Yes, p’ease,” Rose nods excitedly, and Peter hands her a tissue first to wipe her face before grabbing one of the cooled down muffins and breaking it in half. It’s perfectly baked, right down to the middle, and he brightens at how well they’ve turned out. They toast their halves before taking large bites out of them, and they look at each other with approving grins.

“This is perfect. Ugh, best idea ever,” Peter gushes, taking another bite. “Good thing we made a ton of these.”

They end up with three batches of muffins, taking up a good amount of counter space once they’ve laid them out on the cooling racks. He takes a picture with Rose behind the counter with her arms outstretched to showcase the baked goods, a large smile on her face with a few chocolate smears on her cheeks.

Peter helps Rose wash up after dinner and reads her a story upon request, doing his best to do all the characters’ voices justice. Instead of sitting on the chair beside her, she’s asked if he could sit on the bed next to her, allowing her to cozy up and settle against his side. He marvels at her quick trust, and he wraps an arm around her shoulder as he reads.

He feels a tap on his thigh and he looks down, seeing Rose staring at the page of the storybook with a pensive expression on her face. 

“Are you goin’ t’morrow?” Rose asks, her voice quiet.

“I’m staying until your parents and the team comes back,” Peter informs her, slowly closing the book. “I don’t know what time they’ll be here, but you’ve got me until then. Why’d you ask?” 

“Can you visit ‘gain?” Rose asks shyly, as if bracing for rejection. “Had lotsa fun.”

“Oh,” Peter exhales, and he squeezes her shoulder affectionately. “I had lots of fun, too. I don’t know when I’ll be back here, but I’ll make sure to go straight to you when I do. That sound good?”

Rose nods, appeased at his answer before scooting further down into the covers.

“Goo’ night, Peter,” Rose yawns, turning on her side and slinging her arm around his waist. Peter doesn’t move, doesn’t even dare breathe too deeply in case he disturbs her, but he tries to make himself comfortable for the next few hours as she sleeps, scrolling through his phone to pass the time.

He opens the group chat with Steve and Natasha at around eleven, and he types out his update to maintain the quiet, remembering to send the photos he’s taken over the day. He notices that they’re both online, and they quickly react to the last photo of Rose with the muffins before seeing that Natasha was typing out a response.

**Thanks, Peter. ETA 0530.**

He sends a thumbs up emoji before putting his phone down. He carefully untangles himself from Rose’s grasp, stepping out of the room and into the guest room, throwing his clothes into his backpack so he wouldn’t have to worry about it in the morning. He collapses into bed with a deep sigh, succumbing to sleep almost immediately.

“Mr. Parker, Rose is awake and is experiencing high levels of distress,” He hears FRIDAY’s voice overhead around an hour later, and he groans, not able to process the urgency through the sleep fog. “She is in front of your door, Mr. Parker.”

“Ah, sh—,” Peter bolts awake, hastily heading towards the door and he was welcomed with the sight of an extremely distraught four year old. “Rosie.”

“Wh-where you g-go?” Rose wails, her word stilted between hiccuped sobs. “D-don’t—,”

“Hey, hey, squirt,” Peter sits down on the floor in front of her, and he can see how her shoulders visibly shake from the exertion, how she struggles to take in breaths as she cries. “I’m here, Rosie. Didn’t go anywhere. Could you take a deep breath for me?”

Rose lets out a strained whimper, trying her best to follow his instruction but she lets out a frustrated yelp, bringing the corner of her blanket up to harshly wipe her eyes.

“Hey, Rosie, do you wanna play a game?” Peter asks, shifting into a squat and taking both her hands in his. “Do you think you can blow hard enough to topple me over?”

Rose shakes her head, but Peter squeezes her hands.

“Just try, like this,” Peter takes a deep breath, exaggerating a bit by lifting his shoulders and letting out a long exhale. Rose sniffles loudly, hiccuping a bit before following his lead, and he’s relieved to see her let out a shaky breath. “That’s it, atta girl. Can you try again?”

Peter carries on with the game until he sees that she’s breathing better, and when she lets out a strong blow, he sits back on his bottom with a little gasp, drawing out a small smile from her.

“You did it!” Peter exclaims, swinging her arms a bit. He lets go only to wipe the tears from her cheeks, and before he knows it, she’s wrapped her arms around his neck, burying her face into his shoulder. “Hey, I got you, Rosie. You feeling better? Do you want some water?”

She nods against his shirt, and since she doesn’t seem to be keen on letting go anytime soon, he hoists her up onto his hip and carries her to the kitchen, filling a glass with water with his free hand and helping her drink.

“Do you wanna go back to sleep? Your parents will be here in a few hours, they told me,” Peter says, and Rose shakes her head.

“Wan’ wait.”

Peter knows that he should be putting her back in bed, but after that little episode, it seems wrong not to give in. An idea pops into his head, and he bounces Rose a bit.

“Alright. I know what we can do.”

He pulls out the extra sheets and pillows from the guest bedroom and takes a few chairs from the kitchen, rearranging the living room into a massive blanket fort. With only the two of them, it’s incredibly roomy and Rose had brought in her nightlight to illuminate the cozy den from the inside.

“Alright, Agent Rosie. This is hour one of five of Operation Standby,” Peter peeks out from the small entrance they’ve left open before looking back at her. “All clear.”

Rose giggles lightly, her hand muffling the sound.

They talk and watch a few videos on his phone to let the time pass, sneaking a muffin from the counter about an hour in, but they both crash at around half past three in the morning and they don’t rouse even when Natasha and Steve emerge from the elevator doors a few hours later.

“Looks like they had fun,” Steve smiles at the sight of the fort, and Natasha’s eyes narrow slightly.

“He used my good sheets,” Natasha complains, but she crouches down to peek inside and finds Peter sprawled out on his back with Rose slung haphazardly across his stomach, both their mouths opened wide. Steve peeks over her shoulder and he barely stifles a chuckle at the sight, pulling his phone out to take a few pictures.

When Natasha moves to take Rose, Steve gently pulls her back. “Let them sleep a bit longer. I could use a nap.”

“An actual nap?” Natasha quirks an eyebrow, and Steve wraps an arm around her waist.

“I’d indulge, but I really am tired, plus,” Steve lowers his head down, lips hovering over her temple. “We wouldn’t have enough time.”

“Oh, really?” Natasha smirks. “I like tired you.”

“Come on,” Steve sighs softly, tugging them to their room. “You know what they say. Sleep when the baby sleeps, or something to that effect.”

They make quick work of dressing out of their uniforms and cleaning themselves up before settling side by side under the covers, swiftly falling asleep out of sheer exhaustion from the past several days. 

Rose lets out a soft hum upon waking up at around nine, stretching a bit after being in an awkward position the entire night. She wraps her blanket around her shoulders to protect her from the morning chill and steps out of the fort, and when she spots the familiar sets of shoes by her parents’ door, she rushes towards it, turning the knob quietly and grins when she sees them sound asleep.

She clambers up from the foot of the bed and squeezes herself in between them, and Natasha slowly opens her eyes to see her daughter’s shiny ones staring right back at her.

“Hi, Mama,” Rose whispers, and Natasha helps her go under the covers before she melds her little body against hers, sighing deeply.

“Hey, baby,” Natasha murmurs into her scalp, wrapping an arm around her and nuzzles her nose into the crown of her head. “Did you just wake up, hmm?”

Rose nods against her chest, and when she feels more warmth pressing from behind her, she turns her head with a soft giggle. “Daddy!”

“Good morning, sweetheart,” Steve’s voice is groggy, but his happiness is clear in his tone. “We’ve missed you.”

“Miss you,” Rose allows the both of them to plant kisses all over her face, making her laugh and squeal when they start gently poking her sides. “Mama, Daddy, s-stop!”

“Hmm, what do you think, Nat?” Steve holds Rose loosely against his chest, her back to his front. Natasha stalks towards them with a large, dopey grin, her fingers poised to strike.

She tickles her sides and neck, not even sparing the soles of her feet, and the little girl laughs heartily as she flails against Steve who was playing along, his eyes bright.

“Mama!” Rose squeaks out when she blows a raspberry on her stomach, and they relish in the sound of her laughter. They finally let up after a short while, allowing her to catch her breath before taking her from Steve and landing a sound kiss on her cheek.

“Come on, I heard you made breakfast for the team,” Natasha hums, settling her down on the floor and putting her robe on before stepping out of the room, finding that Peter had already taken down their fort, folding the sheets and setting the pillows back on the couch. 

“Good morning, I heard you guys were already awake so I figured I should be heading out,” Peter greets hesitantly, and Rose wriggles a bit in Natasha’s hold, bounding towards him as soon as she lets her down. “Hey, squirt!”

“Muffins, P’ter,” Rose pulls him towards the kitchen counter, and he lifts her up to sit on the barstool. “Mama, Daddy, see? We made breakfast for ‘v’ryone!”

“These look great, Rosebud,” Steve praises, his eyes flickering to Peter for a brief moment. “You want me to call the rest of the team here?”

“Yeah!”

Peter suddenly feels out of place as soon more Avengers file in, all of them making a beeline towards the compound’s youngest resident as she hands each of them a muffin before giving him a long glance when she introduces him as 'my friend Peter'.

"So you're the Peter who's been sending all those pictures," Sam comments, taking a large bite. "Damn, these are pretty good."

"Language," Steve and Natasha berate simultaneously.

"Steve would send them to the rest of the team,” Clint snarks, but it lacks the usual sting. "Haven't seen the kid let loose like that since...ever."

“What did I tell ya? Underoos can be trusted,” Tony adds in, ruffling Peter’s already messy hair. “And to think that Mama and Papa bear doubted me. The audacity.”

“For the record, Mr. Stark, they’ve only just met me a few days ago. I completely understand,” Peter comes to their defense, and Steve gives him a thoughtful look as he wipes Rose’s cheeks with a tissue. “Plus, Rosie was perfect, didn’t give me any trouble at all.”

“That’s good,” Natasha hums. “Anything else you left out from your updates?”

Peter’s eyes bugged out a bit, how did she know? “A few tears last night, but we got through it pretty quickly.”

“We played game, Mama,” Rose swings her feet back and forth by the counter, Steve’s hand on her stomach to make sure she doesn’t fall off. “I blow really hard until he felled over. I won.”

“Breathing regulation technique I found online,” Peter explains, shrugging his shoulders, and Natasha softens a hair.

“Thank you,” Natasha smiles warmly, and he preens a bit under the genuine praise. “Can you still make it to school?”

“It’s—,” Peter checks his watch. “—already second period. It’ll be lunch by the time I get there, I think I’ll just take the day off. I got my friend to cover for me anyways.”

“Come with us!” Rose beams. “We’re goin’ to the zoo!”

“Hey, where’s my invite?” Clint jokes, causing the rest of the team to pipe in with their mock accusations.

“I, too, would like to see the penguins.”

“I haven’t been to the zoo in years. What time are we leaving?”

“I heard there’s a new exhibit—,” 

“It’ll draw too much attention if we invited everyone,” Steve cuts everyone off as soon as he notices Rose looking overwhelmed, cowering a bit at the group grumbles.

“Not if we close out the zoo for a private event,” Tony suggests nonchalantly. “Just say the word, Ro. Uncle Tones can make it happen.”

“No,” Natasha puts her foot down. “The plan is the four of us. You guys can plan another team outing next time, alright? Peter included.”

“Four?”

“Wanda’s coming along,” Natasha shrugs. “Now, if you could so kindly finish your muffins and leave our floor, that would be great.”

They eventually finish up and get ready for the rest of the day, Steve and Wanda wearing baseball caps and Natasha slightly contouring her nose and fixing her hair into a braid to help blend in. As soon as they arrive at the zoo, they’re relieved to see that it’s not as busy as they expected it to be and Natasha taps on Steve’s arm, pointing at the ticket prices.

“Look, Steve, senior citizens are half off,” Natasha reads out in a mischievous tone. “Did you remember to bring your ID?”

“Very funny.” 

Wanda snickers in front of them, having heard the exchange before allowing herself to be pulled forward by the excited four year old with an iron grip on her hand.

Steve pays for the four of them, ignoring Wanda’s insistence of paying for herself, and they grab a map by the entrance, Steve hoisting Rose up onto his shoulders. “Where to first, Rosebud? You wanna find the giraffes?”

“Yes, p’ease,” Rose grins from her perch, holding onto his cap as they navigate towards the exhibit. She gets a glimpse of her favorite animal and she taps his head excitedly. “Daddy, look! Giraffe!”

“That’s right,” Steve affirms, holding onto Natasha’s hand as they move closer. As soon as Rose sees the sheer size of the giraffe up close, the squirms from her place on his shoulders, asking to be held instead.

“Would you like to feed her? It’s her snack time,” One of the zoo keepers approach Wanda, offering a small branch of acacia leaves.

“Rosie, would you like to feed her with me?” Wanda asks, reaching for Rose’s hand. She takes a deep breath and reaches out for her, Steve easily transferring her into her hold and taking his phone out to record the moment.

“Her name’s Lydia,” The zoo keeper smiles, and Rose looks tense despite her earlier excitement. Wanda takes the leaves from him and reaches up and outward towards the giraffe, and as soon as Lydia’s head comes close, Rose presses her front against Wanda’s, reaching out for her parents behind her.

“I thought giraffes were your favorite, malyshka,” Wanda reminds her, turning to give Natasha a look when she feels her ready to pluck her out of her arms. “Look, look. She’s eating, see?”

“Too big,” Rose’s voice is muffled by the fabric of her shirt, but Wanda hikes her up higher on her hip and she turns her head to take a peek at the creature a few feet away from her.

“She is very big, but she is gentle,” Wanda nods, looking between Rose and the giraffe. She hears Rose sniffle a bit, and when she looks down she sees her looking up at Lydia with a pensive but curious look on her face.

“The giraffe has blue tongue,” Rose comments shyly. “Too much candy.”

They hear Natasha and Steve laugh from behind them, and she eases up a bit at the sound, giggling softly as well.

“Do you want to try?” Wanda asks with a smile, and when Rose gives her a tentative nod, she asks for another branch and places it in her hand, wrapping hers around it to guide her.

“Atta girl, Ro,” Steve praises, moving a bit to the side to get a good angle of them feeding Lydia. As soon as they’re done, they thank the zoo keeper and Rose stays in Wanda’s arms, reeling slightly from the experience.

“Did you see me, Mama?” Rose grins, and Natasha cups the back of her head affectionately.

“I did, baby. You were so brave,” Natasha leans to kiss her temple. “What animal would you like to see next?”

“Wanda, wha’s your fav’rite?” Rose asks, tapping her collarbone. The teenager mulls over the question for a moment before letting out a small smile at a particular memory that resurfaces in her mind.

“Otters,” Wanda answers honestly. “I used to have a stuffed otter, and my brother had the other one. Our parents said we used to hold hands when we were asleep.”

“Otters hold hands when they sleep?” Rose’s eyes are filled with wonder at the revelation.

“They do,” Wanda confirms, and when they turn the corner, she spots a small romp of them behind a glass panel. “Here they are.”

“They’re so cute,” Rose gushes, kicking her feet a bit and as soon as she puts her down, she presses her face against the glass. “They swim so fast!”

Wanda crouches down to her level, and she points to two otters floating on their backs, grinning widely at their clasped paws. “See? So they don’t float apart from each other.”

“I like otters now,” Rose declares, holding Wanda’s hand.

“Does that mean they’re each other’s otter half?” Steve barely had time to register the smack against his arm.

“Keep up the dad jokes and I will be making you walk home alone.”

“Come on, Nat,” Steve bumps her shoulder. “We drove here. It’s not like I have any otter options.” 

“God dammit,” Natasha rolls her eyes, biting back a laugh. “Just for that joke, you’re buying us ice cream.”

“It’s not like I wasn’t going to, dear,” Steve kisses her temple before changing the topic, afraid of what she might do if he cracks another joke. “Wanda’s great with her.”

“She is,” Natasha agrees easily, watching as Rose follows an otter swimming back and forth, giggling wildly. “They think of each other as sisters. It’s sweet.” 

After promising that they’ll pass by the otters again before they head out, they roam around the other exhibits before eventually settling down on a bench while Steve swings Rose on one arm towards an ice cream cart.

“Thank you for letting me come along,” Wanda turns her head to give Natasha a tight but grateful smile. “I haven’t enjoyed myself like this in a while.”

“Is this your first time at the zoo?” Natasha asks, and when Wanda nods, the older woman leans forward as if sharing a secret. “Mine too.”

“Really?”

“Zoos aren’t exactly Red Room approved excursions,” Natasha says nonchalantly, and Wanda tries her hardest not to wince. “But it’s nice. I get to share a first with my girls.”

Wanda’s eyes widen at her words, swallowing thickly.

"Did I say something wrong?"

“When I was young, our parents tried to distract us from what’s going on outside,” Wanda reveals, and Natasha leans back in, wanting her to know she was all ears. “Of course they couldn’t, the guns and grenades were always too loud. But we played along, and we appreciated their efforts to hide us from the horrors of the world.”

“They sound wonderful,” Natasha offers, and Wanda nods once, her bottom lip threatening to wobble.

“They were,” Wanda straightens up a bit, her thick accent coming through from emotion. “I am grateful for you welcoming me as part of your family but I cannot help but feel that it is wrong. Like I am replacing them in a way, and I don’t want to.”

“I’m not trying to replace them, Wanda, nor would I ever want to,” Natasha brings her hand over her knee. “But I know a thing or two about losing family, and I can assure you that I still carry that grief with me everyday.”

“What do you do to cope?”

“I’ve learned to give in to it. I remember that there is nothing I can do to change it, but it makes me cherish what I have now,” Natasha looks up to see Rose stepping both her feet to fit over Steve’s shoe as they wait in line, giggling when he lifts his leg to step forward. “It’s okay to move forward, you’re not upsetting anyone in the past by doing so.”

“Thank you,” Wanda whispers, hastily swiping at her cheek. 

“No thanks needed,” Natasha squeezes her knee tightly. “And if you need anything, even just someone to talk to, you know that I’m just here. Steve would say the same, and Rosie can be a real good listener if she tries.”

“I will remember that,” Wanda chuckles, dragging out a long exhale. Steve and Rose come up to them to hand their ice cream cones, and the former raises an eyebrow at Wanda’s puffy eyes.

“You alright?” Steve asks, concern evident in his voice but Wanda only gives him a small smile.

“I am now.”

They go through the rest of the exhibits as they finish their snack, and after a few hours, they notice Rose starting to drag her feet, yawning every once in a while. She tries her best to soldier on until they reach the lions, but she staggers and finally relents, holding her arms up to Natasha and she lifts her up without hesitation.

“Are you tired, baby?” Natasha wipes the sweat-damp hair matted to her forehead with her hand. “Do you want to go back home?”

Rose shakes her head stubbornly, not quite ready for their outing to be over. “Jus’ resting, Mama. M’okay.”

“We should’ve brought the stroller,” Steve says as they take the scenic route to the exit. “Might’ve been easier.”

“It’s alright, I don’t mind carrying her while I still can,” Natasha pulls her daughter higher up against her front, little legs dangling limply by her sides. “Do you wanna get her something from the gift shop?”

Steve nods, ushering the three girls in first into the shop and he looks through the shelves, grabbing a frame magnet and a child sized shirt with the zoo’s logo on it as a keepsake. He turns the corner and sees an assortment of stuffed animals, his hand automatically reaching for the small giraffe on the top shelf. He sees Wanda a few feet away from him, her fingers tracing the synthetic fur of a stuffed otter.

“We can get that if you’d like,” Steve offers, and Wanda jumps a bit, hastily putting it back.

“Oh, no, it’s alright. I’m too old for it,” Wanda turns him down quickly, but Steve, as stubborn as they come, was already grabbing it and adding it to the basket. 

“I heard what you and your brother had, the stuffed otters,” Steve wraps an arm around her shoulder. “I know it’s not the same, but I want you to have something to remember today by.”

Wanda doesn’t think she could forget about today even if she tried, and she’s constantly taken aback by their kindness and easy acceptance. With a steady gaze, she turns back to the shelf and grabs a smaller baby otter, holding it as if it was the most precious thing in the world.

“As long as you do not separate these two.” 

Steve thinks she’s not just talking about the otters, and it’s only confirmed by the way he sees her looking back at Natasha gently swaying Rose where she’s standing, her cheek resting on the top of her head, lips murmuring words he couldn’t quite make out.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” 

**Author's Note:**

> I've read so many Mama Nat fics, I couldn't help but write my own. I've also read The Name of The Rose comic and just had the urge to tie that particular aspect of her character in here. I'd love to continue this verse if any are interested to see (and I'm open to any suggestions!)
> 
> feedback is very much appreciated, thanks for reading x


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